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Thread: I'm totally attracted to one teaching assistant. What should I do?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2016
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    I'm totally attracted to one teaching assistant. What should I do?

    I'll try to make it as short as possible. Hopefully I can get your feedback on this situation going on.

    So, I've met this man, about 10 years older than me, who is one of many teaching assistants in one of my classes at the university. Since there are many students listening to this class, at the lab assignments we have about 4 or 5 teaching assistants at the same time so they can mark our work faster. There was the first time I've came to a contact with him. He is actually self reserved person, even a bit of cold-looking, so he is not really noticed by other female students out here. Heck, I didn't even notice him myself until that very day.

    At the first lab assignment, he picked a group of people in class to mark their work, mine also. He was really gentle towards me and didn't give me a hard time (like other teaching assistants usually like to do). I thought he is such a nice person (also totally my type) so I kinda looked forward to the next time I could see him again. Since the first lab assignment, he always picked me to mark my work and he either let me go without really orally examining me or, if he saw that I have a hard time with something from the class, he would sit next to me and make his time to help me as much as he can. Sometimes, I've caught him watching me. At first, whenever he realized I caught his gaze, he would immediately look away. But after some period of time into the semester, he stopped looking away. It came to a point that, whenever we spotted each other on hallway, we just couldn't stop staring at each other. Even though I always felt this huge chemistry between us, whenever he accidentally touched me during lab assignments, whenever he gets cocky and just won't stop staring at me until I look away - I tried to "get to my senses" by telling myself: you are just one of his students, you are also waaay youger than him, don't misunderstand this whole thing. But I just can't understand why would someone stare at you this much without them thinking anything of you. Because I'm so attracted to him, I even tried to stop this "stare game" and tried to avoid him.. but it's hard to walk past him, knowing he is continuously watching me, without looking back at him.

    I hope I can hear your guys' opinion on this, I really need a few. Do you think I'm just imagining things? should I do something? Please help a girl in need! thanks!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Gender
    Female
    Posts
    190
    Quote Originally Posted by regexus View Post
    I'll try to make it as short as possible. Hopefully I can get your feedback on this situation going on.

    So, I've met this man, about 10 years older than me, who is one of many teaching assistants in one of my classes at the university. Since there are many students listening to this class, at the lab assignments we have about 4 or 5 teaching assistants at the same time so they can mark our work faster. There was the first time I've came to a contact with him. He is actually self reserved person, even a bit of cold-looking, so he is not really noticed by other female students out here. Heck, I didn't even notice him myself until that very day.

    At the first lab assignment, he picked a group of people in class to mark their work, mine also. He was really gentle towards me and didn't give me a hard time (like other teaching assistants usually like to do). I thought he is such a nice person (also totally my type) so I kinda looked forward to the next time I could see him again. Since the first lab assignment, he always picked me to mark my work and he either let me go without really orally examining me or, if he saw that I have a hard time with something from the class, he would sit next to me and make his time to help me as much as he can. Sometimes, I've caught him watching me. At first, whenever he realized I caught his gaze, he would immediately look away. But after some period of time into the semester, he stopped looking away. It came to a point that, whenever we spotted each other on hallway, we just couldn't stop staring at each other. Even though I always felt this huge chemistry between us, whenever he accidentally touched me during lab assignments, whenever he gets cocky and just won't stop staring at me until I look away - I tried to "get to my senses" by telling myself: you are just one of his students, you are also waaay youger than him, don't misunderstand this whole thing. But I just can't understand why would someone stare at you this much without them thinking anything of you. Because I'm so attracted to him, I even tried to stop this "stare game" and tried to avoid him.. but it's hard to walk past him, knowing he is continuously watching me, without looking back at him.

    I hope I can hear your guys' opinion on this, I really need a few. Do you think I'm just imagining things? should I do something? Please help a girl in need! thanks!
    Hi welcome to LF!

    I think you are just obsessing/fantasizing. Most young ladies like yourself find guys who are out of reach, stand off-ish, mysterious, etc. to be irresistible. Every passing day, there's a forbidden glance, wonderment, excitement which is only building up of sexual tension. It's very addicting, you don't want to stop.

    You are not the only one to have a crush on a person of authority or of a teaching position. He may find you appealing but he has a job to do, and needs to indeed keep student assistant relationships professional. Some Uni's have certain rules for student/employees/teacher dating and it's possible he can't be fraternizing with the students. He could very well lose his job. Unfortunately my advice is to back off and keep your emotions in check. You don't want to get him in trouble or cause an unnecessary stir among students and faculty.

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