Longing to be loved

[pcmaster]

So I talked to this girl at work and she told me something interesting - she have a sis who live in the house next to me ! So I messaged her sister on dating site and told her whats the deal, that I want to meet. Its funny that we live so close, it would be crazy not to meet.

[TheEvilJester]

Wait, this is the sister of the gal you were sort of dating? Or this is a completely different person? I'm assuming you meant that the gal at work is somebody completely different. In that case, I would say to just tread lightly since this is the sister of somebody at your work. But, it isn't like you work with her sister, so I see no reason not to give it a shot. If she's interested, go for it.

Still, there is that connection to work so at least be a little careful. Good luck to you! Hope it goes well. Good for you for being ready to bounce back and try again.

[pcmaster]

Thanks for suggestions Jester.

This is different person. But I didnt messaged her on dating site. Was thinking I did cause I pressed "Send Message" Button but on that stupid site you have to press Enter on you keyboard to send a message. Anyway I added her on FB instead but she didnt accept. So whatever. Shes not that beautiful - didnt wanted to take her out or something just wanted to talk with her cause she lives nearly.

Another thing is that the girl I been chatting with for 3 weeks kinda broke up with me. She said - "We dont and wont have anything in common." So yeah will have to search for new girl to go with me to work party. Im already buying new suite for party. Actually it will be more like Prom because people will be in suits and dresses and dancing to live music. Last year I went alone in my old suite that I have since 9th grade - yeah 11 year old suite, my first one. And its not actually a suite just a combo of pants and jacked. So decided will buy a suite this year. They are pretty cheap - like one weeks pay at my work. And you can choose colours and fabric.
But really need a girl to go with. Dont want to get stalked by that crazy dude from last year who ended up folowing me everywhere until I had enough and left.

Have 10 more days to find a girl. If I will have totaly no luck then will have to ask that girl from work to go with me - theres a small girl with glasses and perky boobs who single now, the girl I talked with suggested me to ask her to prom. But that is my last resort.

- - - Updated - - -

Me: For Christmas I want a dragon.

Santa: Be realistic.

Me: Ok I want girlfriend.

Santa: What colour do you want your dragon?

[TheEvilJester]

LOL! I like that little Santa exchange at the end. Sounds like my life. ....Though, these days I think I might actually rather have the dragon. Definitely seems a lot more realistic for me.

Anyways, why do you NEED a date for your company Christmas party? It's not like it actually IS prom, even if people are getting dressed up and all that. Typically a company Christmas party is for people who work at the company. Sometimes family or dates are welcome, but even so I don't see why you should feel you NEED a date for it. Heck, office Christmas parties aren't usually anything all that great. ...But then again, maybe I'm not the right person to ask. I'm not much of a party animal in general.

[pcmaster]

Well I explained before why I need date. Besides the whole thing will happen across the street from my house in a college. Last year there was not just food and booze but also shows and some smaller celebrities from TV. So some fun as well. Besides it wont be office party because we are freaking factory. And it happens only once a year. Basicaly its my time to shine lol. Actually everyones time to shine cause we work like cinderellas in that factory and see eachother in work clothes. So here the reason to wear suits and dresses.

LOL someone said that its easy to find girls for entertainment. But in my case they dont even care to reply to my messages. Last girl couldnt or didnt wanted to find time for a date. Now dont even replying to my messages too. This all, all this BS experienced lately with girls just makes me miss more previous girl. Her motto was that man should leave house with full stomach and empty balls. And indeed I had the chance to eat at her house twice and she was good cook and amazing in bed. It was actually impossible to leave her without having sex - at least no ordinary guy would resist tempation I did.

Dont know whats wrong with girls these days. I keep hearing words from them like - I can live without sex for long. - both girls who told me that actually did masturbate, so in my eyes this dont counts like being able live without sex when you satisfy yourself.

Here I am now 4 months without jerking off and thinking seriously about having sex. This sex drive gives me serious focus on girls, Im serious about dating girls and wont leave unused chances to meet girls, like I did before. Now theres no maybe. Such word dont exist in my dictionary. If theres gona be chance to meet or date girls I will use it.

LOL this reminds me of good old army motivation -

Defeat Retreat, those are not in my words.
I don't understand those definitions.
I don't understand when things go wrong.
I don't understand mistakes.
But I do understand this.
I understand victory and I understand never surrendering.
No matter how bad things go. My heart my mind will carry my body when my limbs are too weak.
WHO AM I?
I AM A CHAMPION !
HISTORY WILL REMEMBER ME !

https://youtu.be/rYEw-8ZPrT8?list=LLsx6isKCu4vxjq1nsEMHFlA

[TheEvilJester]

God, I so missed my calling, I think. LOL! (Or at least one of my possible callings.) Only recently in life have I felt like I would have always been perfect for the military, and things like that passage you shared above are why. When I was younger, I was just too much of a frigging mess. It never really even seriously occurred to me to join the military. I was also sort of focused on starting my career/adult life and just never thought of it. ...But, frankly, I've always had the kind of drive and refusal to give up in me that would probably have made me great for the military.

Now, I'm just too damn old to start. LOL! I mean, I'm technically still of appropriate age, but I still think starting now would just be ridiculous.

Anyway, this isn't the first time you've equated a desire (or lack of desire) to find love to whether or not you (or the person in question) is regularly "taking care of themselves" in that way. To be honest with you, I really don't think that is the right way to look at it. You shouldn't be looking to find a girlfriend because you desperately need sexual release. You should be looking to find a girlfriend because you want love. So, to be perfectly honest, if you were "taking care of yourself" every day and STILL met somebody you thought you maybe could love... THAT would be a better time to meet somebody. Not when you haven't had any release in months, so in large part whether you realize it or not you are probably just motivated by needing that.

But, hey, if it works for you, then more power to you. Good luck to you either way.

[pcmaster]

Its not too late Jester. You dont have to join military right away but you can at least find out about their daily routine and at least do or try the same training as they so you see where you stand in terms how much your body is prepared. Some guy once posted on here a navy seal training routine and it made a lot of sense. Think there was push-ups and pull-ups too in there.
Hardest about the army is that you are alone and away from home. Its mentaly hard because your body and soul is getting challenged everyday.

Anyway I feel like Im taking care of myself without masturbation. I have more energy and need less sleep. But I should sleep more and work easy, otherwise Im killing myself.

[ajuna]

Thanks for replying Jester. People been replying to all these BS topics but missed most important one - my topic.

So yeah. I understand that you want love. You are not teenager who is raging with hormones. You get turned on by love cause when you get older brain do rewire in this way that love is more sexy than sex.

Anyway man. WHat you need is find a right girl at the right time. Someone who would be ready to love and there will be you - just in the right time to steal her heart. Sounds easy I know. But it seems like that is what we need to do.

My love horoscope on http://www.astrosofa.com says interesting things about me and I find it to be true. -

-Most people need the physical presence of their partner in order to carry on a love affair, but you are quite capable of conducting an affair at a distance.-
-You may find that for you, sex is not a necessary component of a close love relationship and that intimacy of the mind is as important as physical intimacy.-

Also I it said that "Although you find sex naturally satisfying you can carry out love affair without it."

So yeah [MENTION=71386]TheEvilJester[/MENTION]. You should check your love horoscope and portrait too to see what applies to you. We might be a like as it seems.

It just sucks that I waited for so long cause now these days Im so tired from work alone. I know how tired I am after making out, not even talking about sex here. Already 4 years ago when I was 23 I was afraid of sexually demanding girl cause knew it would take more energy from me than I want. Then again at 20 years of age I was not afraid from sex at all. Just wish I had more energy now. Still have sex drive so at least not completely old lol. Despite that previous girl said that Im hiding something from her since I sleep so much - I must be 40 years old just lying to her cause I look younger.

Now chatting with 25 year old girl. She agreed to meet when I was still with previous girl. Now messaged her again and she seemed okay with it. But shes not a big chatter. Just want to chat with her as much as I can before meeting cause know I wont be able to say everything and might even lose speech once we meet. Want to feel at least comfortable in chat before meeting in person. Even if we meet, I dont thing that without a lot of chatting relationship will be sustainable.

This is very interesting! Why would you hide something from her just because you sleep a lot?
Maybe you have a lack of vitamins, do you go outside a lot? I guess you have to do something for yourself, to be happy and healthy. Get your circulation going.
Once you are in balance with yourself then you are able to be open for a real relationship. It's not like you have to have a relationship to feel good it's the other way round.
Take care of yourselves!

[pcmaster]

Thanks ajuna but I lack energy more because I work hard and are experiencing cosuqences of accident.

[MENTION=71386]TheEvilJester[/MENTION] Its been a while but now have a new girl Im chatting with. Messaged her because of her big juggs. Well she responded but in week of chatting I found nothing more interesting about her. She have 2 kids and shes a teacher at pre school. Whats diferent about this girl is that I told her Im a virgin. Took her a while to believe. Anyway we are both on same dating sites and I bought her a VIP on one of them. After that she started to message me. She said I need sex and said she have a big boobs. I feel like shes coming on to me. Also yesterday she messaged me on my phone despite that we are chatting on FB. Said she wanted me to have her number.

Now the problem is that I want to take it slow and meet only after few months. I could wait with sex till summer. But she said she had sex recently like last year. For me it seems like shes looking at me to have sex cause she migh be horny again. Now this girl can get laid easy if she wanted cause people offer her sex on a street and offer her money on internet. Somehow its hard to blame girls for being slutty with us normal guys.
Like I said I really want to take it slow but feel like I have only 3 dates without sex until girls start losing interest big time. Been talking with this girl and she said sex are important and everything is arranged to sex. Sex is first nowadays and feelings comes after. Problem is I want feeling to be first and only then sex.

[TheEvilJester]

I mean, frankly, if you want to get to know somebody first before it even leads to sex, then it sounds like this gal is already obviously the wrong one for you. Sounds like that was practically the first thing out of her mouth. Nothing wrong with that if that was also what you want, but it's not.... so why waste your time? Or hers, for that matter.

Now, I'm certainly the wrong person to ask about this (I'm not like normal guys, sex isn't as important to me as it seems to be to most men), but I wouldn't think 3 dates without sex should seem so bad. Again, not like I'd know, but I don't personally think I'd want to have sex with somebody until we've at least been dating a little while. That isn't to say we can't kiss, make out, or whatever else feels right. Heck, that also doesn't mean I'd avoid it if it happens to feel right to us both.... but I don't think it should just be expected that date 3 = sex, or even date whatever equals sex. It should just flow naturally for the couple.

[pcmaster]

Hi man ! [MENTION=71386]TheEvilJester[/MENTION]

Its been a while. Not so agressive with girls to meet them but. Girls been getting agressive lol. At least the ones I chat with. So few days ago this second girl - the one who agreed to meet while I was still with first one. She messaged me first on FB despite that didnt often reply my messages. She said that shes waiting all the time when I will go to her shop to talk to her. She is selling mobile phones in a shopping mall. Its like 10 minutes walk from my home but when I pass by her shop I ussualy never see her except once when saw her for like 2 seconds
Not so great looking in real life but I said that she looks better in life than in pictures. Anyway I dont wanna talk to her at her job yet cause its always been bad luck for me to talk with girls at their shops. So I told her.


And another girl - the one about who you talked in your previous post. Shes only one who knows Im virgin and yeah she says I have to try it. She asked when we are gona meet. Funny she assked ir the same day second girl messaged me saying shes waiting fir me to visit. Anyway she called me on the phone yesterday and we talked. She sounded girly and not very confident, that was first time I heard her voice. However it was nice to talk and I felt energetic after the talk. Still not feeling ready for anything. Dont feel stable enough. She wants to meet saturday for tea. Lol, for the first time I feel like tea is okay, after I been inviding girls to restaurants all the time. Really I just wanna talk, kiss and make out. But thats the problem - then what? Soon she would need sex and I dont feel ready for anything serious. Besides she asked with how many girls Im chatting despite that I see her on datung site almost everyday. Again double standarts.

Girls wouldnt be a problem for me if they didnt want sex. Just really hope that there is some girl who puts feelings before sex. As few experienced girls havw told me - these days sex comes first and only then comes feelings, relationships a d sex. Basically bonding happens with sex.

Again Im not looking to get my heart and feelings fcked. Whats the point for me to sleep with a girl and get attached to her if she wont feel the same way. Its easier for virgin to fall in live than for experienced girl to have feelings after sex.

[TheEvilJester]

I mean, I'm certainly not the person to ask about how things are these days. I'm so out of touch it goes from being funny to being sad right back to being funny again. LOL! But, at least when I was younger, it always seemed like the opposite was usually the problem. Guys just wanted sex however, whenever, and with whomever they could get it and women wanted a more serious relationship before sex.

Maybe that's changed these days, I don't know. And, of course, no two people are alike. So, whether or not that's changed, there are going to be some women who are more so interested in just a lot of casual sex, and there will be women who are interested in deeper feelings BEFORE sex becomes involved.

So, really you just need to look for somebody who more so matches what you are looking for in a relationship. If you want a deeper relationship before sex becomes involved, there is nothing wrong with that. If any particular gal you are chatting up wants to just have casual sex with guys an worry later about a serious relationship (or even not at all if that is what they choose), there is nothing wrong with that. ....BUT.... that would be one example where maybe you two aren't the right match. So, again, why waste your time?

Good luck to you either way. I definitely know how you feel because I've always been very different from most man in this way. Personally, I'd rather just never have sex again rather than to just randomly have it with whatever woman will let me. To me, sex is part of a serious relationship. I need the deeper connection before sex even interests me. That may make me weird, but I'm fine with that.

So, as far as I am concerned, there is nothing wrong with it if you feel that way.... you just shouldn't settle for somebody who doesn't match that.

[pcmaster]

Thanks [MENTION=71386]TheEvilJester[/MENTION] .
Really should just find a girl with who I match. Its like I match in some ways with girls but not all. Yesterday chattet with a second girl and it seems like we both dont rush with sex. She said that she finds hard to trust people and especially guys. Its been only a 14 months since she broke up with her ex. So yeah still wounded she is as I understood from chat with her. However will hit her up again if things with third girl ends then will take it slowly with second girl. Big plans for summer planning to take it more serious with girls.

[TheEvilJester]

I mean, you'll probably never match with anybody in all ways. No two people are exactly alike. So, not matching in certain ways CAN be okay, heck it can even be good.... it is just a matter of specifically in what ways do you not match. It depends on how big of a deal they are. Sexual incompatibility is one example where that is big enough to possibly be enough of a deal breaker. Sex shouldn't be the end all be all of a relationship, but it is important.

Good luck to you in finding a gal who matches you in all the best ways. Maybe this new gal could be it.

[pcmaster]

New girl is so great in many ways. I dont have to run after her. Its like shes a stalker. Been texting me since 6AM since I wake up and calling sometimes even 2 times a day. Previous girl never called me and I had to call.

Yesterday was cool. I started moorning with lyrics. I was at work about to start but she had day off. I wrote - Someone will say I sold my soul, that my success is only a budget. But while you be eating breakfast ! I will earn for lunch for us .- And it was payday and I got paid more than ever in 2 years of work. I texted her and said that its a payday and indeed I have earned for us for lunch. And invited her to Sushi restaurant. She agreed. Then later she called me and said she bought tickeds to Ice sculptures for us. Also she asked what is my next move and she said if things were in her hands then she would want me to spend this night with her. Yes she wants kisses and caresses already.
I think things are going pretty damn good especially because we been met only once for tea and first messaged in new year.

Theres only one thing that is a problem now - no much to talk about. She called me just now and was so silent. I talked a bit then she talked but there was a lot of silence in middle. Its akward on the phone. On a date silence was not so akward but on the phone you can feel it.
With friends I can talk a lot or they can talk but now it seems like we dont connect so well in this verbal area. Maybe we are just incompatible in talking. Wish we had some common interests but we are pretty much different.