Should I stay with him? Lies

[amyblack]

Hi everyone,

first of all, thank you for taking the time to read this!

My boyfriend recently lied to me, and unfortunately I found out. I now don't trust him, have lost any physical attraction to him, but still think he's an amazing person and partner.

The lie is a complicated one to explain, so please bear with me. We've been together for almost a year. Recently we had a few disagreements about his relationship with his ex. He claims they're just friends but she relies on him a lot for attention and they go to concerts, dinners, exhibitions alone together once in while. He says that she is his best friend and that there is absolutely no sexual attraction between them.

For his birthday, she got concert tickets (for the two of them) for one of his favourite bands. They went together and he didn't tell me anything about it. We spoke on the phone that night (after the concert) and I was under the impression that he had spent the evening at his house, with his housemates.

That was on a Sunday. On the Wednesday he tells me that he's going to a concert with his ex. I was fine with it. (Remember I knew nothing about Sunday). On Wednesday I decided to listen to some of the band's music, to get familiar with his tastes, and Spotify tells me that that band is playing in Glasgow on that exact day. We don't live anywhere near Glasgow. There is no way he could have gone to that concert. He lied.

I confronted him, and he said that he made up the concert on Wednesday because he felt guilty about no telling me about the one on Sunday.

What should I do? Did he feel guilty? Or was he just scared of me finding out from our mutual friends?

Should I trust him? What bout his relationship with his ex?

[daisyflower]

Is it possible for you to go to the concerts with them? Especially if you enjoy the same music.
It's concerning that he lied. If it's all so innocent, then there is nothing to hide and lie about.
It's a tricky one. Try discussing with him that the break of trust is a big concern for you. Also discuss your concerns about their friendship. If he truely loves you, making you feel secure in your relationship should be his priority.
Just my thoughts for what it's worth.
" the best predictor of future behavior is past behavior "