Crush behaviour

[Nisa]

i know maybe if i started talking more it could go somewhere but it would be weird as were not that close. We do glance at eachother alot tho so I'd say we look at eachother more than talking tbh. he does talk but it'll be more when its just us which is not often.

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And yeh snapchat and instagram may not be important i just thought if i started to talk to him on snapchat will be closer in person.. he does like my instagram posts tho.

[Hooo!]

then ask him why he doesnt have you in snapchat anyways.

i dont see where the problem is.
Either you like him. Then you make some effort to spend time with him or you dont.
If the whole reason for you two not talking is because you arent in any class together then no adult would get to know another adult.
If you want to talk to people - talk to them.

[Nisa]

Yeah true point just im not that confident in talking to him but thx

[pcmaster]

What helps with confidence is stoppng jerking off so unrelesed sex drive kicks in and makes you do things like talk to opposite gender.

Also confidence comes from experience. First times talking can be hard but it gets better. Especialy when you do it often and with diferent people. Its like sports and warming up. Also when you overcome this shyness it can come back once you stop socializing. So its important to talk regulary with people to keep a social easy going personality. Do some sport to get out of your head. You thibk to much but do too little. So do first and think later. This way you will do more.

[Nisa]

Yeah i think i overthink too much about the whole thing, he probably doesn't even like me like that. Thx for the advise

[Hooo!]

Yeah i think i overthink too much about the whole thing, he probably doesn't even like me like that. Thx for the advise

you miss all shots you never take.

you miss all opportunities you never try

and you miss all the sex you never kissed.

i think you get the idea.

My dad always told me
who doesnt try it will not get
who doesnt **** it gets no kid.

[Nisa]

Aha thats true, but theres no point anymore in trying i do like him but he is not interested as much as i am as he would have made more effort then, so i think i may aswell just try not to be so obsessed and just wait and see.

[pcmaster]

But do you made equal efford? We should give more than we take. Uts a simple law and its a sin not to know it.

Anyway waiting is passive and at this age it dont go far since guys are not serious at teen years. But when you are 20 then you will get most attention and being passive might work. Guys will be easy to start dating when you will join dating site. Till then passive behaviour might not work at all.

[Hooo!]

just because people dont talk to you doesnt mean they are not interested
hell if a girl tells you shes not interested EVEN THAT doesnt necessarily mean she really is not interested.

if people are annoyed by you and if they ignore you usually that means they are not interested. But thats not true either entirely.

[Nisa]

I meant like he does talk but its always if he's just asking me something, its nothing that shows he likes me. I dont know why i just thought it as if he doesn't talk much he isn't interested?. Today he was in front of me waiting for our exam and he saw me then we both looked away, he then started to walk forward so I didn't look and he came up to me but just asked if i had a spare protractor then i said no sorry & he just sed oh ok. I try to not make it into such a big deal like he only asked for a protractor but to me it's like he actually asked me, if you get that.

[pcmaster]

Yes I see Nisa. You didnt had much going on with guys yet so these little things matter to you and makes you think if they mean anything. Well when you will get a bit more experienced then you wont look into these small things cause you will have much more action behind your back.

Again Im putting pressure on your future. In your age I was not experienced too and would start to thing maybe girl likes me if she talking with me about normal stuff. But now when I have much more experience and Im in my twenies I just wish I would have interacted with girls in my teens to have experience earlier and be prepared to be in a happy relationship earlier rather than undergoing trial and errior period when Im an aduld.

So yeah this age right now is a good age for you Nisa to start trying. Even if you are passive theres a lot of ways you can give guys opportunities to talk to you and open doors for conversations. Right now you should be going on your first dates and having your first kisses. That is if you dont want to have these things later when your friends and classmates are getting married and having kids. Sure for everyone their own time, some are late bloomers but generaly at age 17- 18 people are having their first serious GF, BF.
If I were you I would google stuff and watch youtube videos of Mathew Hussey where he teaches girls about guys. Ussualy girls at your age to get attention tries to look as beautiful as they can, what is not a bad idea but can get frustrating fast if nothing happens. Much more results can be achieved by not just being passive but doing something to help conversations happen. Also even when texting there are ways how to make guy think of you in a serious way. You can google 10 texts how to make guy think of you.

This is good age so enjoy it. You have benefit of being in school with same aged people as you, also you can do some sports outside of school and guys are ussualy dominating in sports so even more social situations with guys. Just stay active and live life, then things will happen naturally. Take care girl.

[Hooo!]

maybe he is shy?

i dont get the issue

here are a few facts for you:

1) you dont know how he feels towards you
2) interpreting anything that you dont know and have no good clue on is usually useless
3) if you want something you should not wait for it to come to you - unless you have done something that will make it come to you

maybe he asks you for anything because he likes you and doesnt know how to talk to you
maybe he doesnt talk because he is not interested
maybe he is gay
it doesnt matter

if you want to get to know him
do something for it
if you dont want it
then dont.

and that really is applicable to anything in life.

[Nisa]

Thankyou pcmaster

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[MENTION=85121]Hooo![/MENTION]. I know that he is definitely not a shy person in general as he is always talking to boys/girls, but maybe he is with me as i see him talking to girls completely fine and he actually was talking to my friend when i was stood right next to him and then he was talking to other girls
so he's always talking to them.

Also when you said maybe he asks me for anything because he likes me he actually has asked me questions alot as i said before about the protractor but he's asked me for a tissue, he called me & asked if i had a pen and more so yh he does ask me alot of things. As we only have one lesson together i was walking up with my friend and he was behind, he then said something to my friend about these guys in front then i turned around and he was already looking at me as in he was waiting for me to turn around.
But i know he's not shy with any other girls i just get the feeling he lacks in talking abit just with me

[pcmaster]

It might be so. If he likes you then that would explain shyhness. But its also hard to talk with girls who dont say much. When girl makes first move or initates then its so much more easier for guys. Its not just up to guy. Its also about girl and relationship frame shes building. If you talk a little then thats gona be relationship frame.

You are not a real outgoing girl yet who makes it easy for guys. Taking is easy. You gotta give value as well. Be first to say Hi and ask him questions too - show interest in him too. Show indicators of interest. You might have to leave your comfort zone in order to grow. If you are not doing what you are afraid of you are not growing.

[Hooo!]

do you not understand me or do you not want to understand me
HIS REASONS for him acting a certain way or not ARE UNKOWN to you
SPECULATING about it IS NO USE.

it is therefore even more important to FIGURE OUT WHAT YOU WANT regarding this guy.
and when you know it then all the more it is important to actually DO SOMETHING to GET WHAT YOU WANT.


€ actually im thinking you just like to phantasize about him and like to write here about it. I dont get the inclination that you actually want to do anything to even try make something happen.
and im fine with that - if it is that way. If it is that way - but you dont want it to be that way, then we can adress that instead.