Brother in law

[kaz6y]

So I've known my brother in law for the past 16 years. We would speak but it would be awkward. Then 5 years ago everything changed and he started to become more chatty. It may be harmless fun but anytime we are cooking a meal together and we both taste something off the same spoon he says "it's like we're getting off with each other". He has said this on several occasions and even once when my husband was in earshot. I must add that I just brushed the comment off. Last month we were at a family gathering and he came up to my end of the table, sat in the chair next to mine and started pressing his leg really hard against mine. It wasn't like he was short for space!! Every time I moved so did he. I'm starting to get a bit concerned he might be wanting to be more than my brother in law and I was really just looking for some advice before making a fool of myself and confronting him!!

[richiro]

the answer is yes he's definitely giving off creeepy signs.
yes i woudl definitely address this now and let him know that you would like for him to stop maing the comments, making physical contact with you of any kind.. and that you are asking him nicely and graciously between the two of you to stop it and be appropriate around you.
IF he refuses, then "he leaves you no choice" but to tell your husband that you will no longer attend anything where he is present, and that he is no longer welcome in your house.. and you won't tell him why.. but if your husband asks why, he (the brother in law) leaves you no option at that point but answer your husband's questions. IT'S UP TO HIM...

its very important to emphasize that its up to him and that he is leaving you "with no choice" if he doesn't respect your wishes and request, and that he knows you are GIVING him the chance to end this quietly without embarrassment and drama within the family.

good luck. i would only do this in a public setting or at a family gathering (but off to the side) so that if it gets uncomfy you can escape or atleast easily get back into others' views so he won't be able to impose his will on you without witnesses.

hang in there!

- - - Updated - - -

i should also say. if you feel it is putting yourself in danger to try and do this quietly and alone with him - then by all means go to your husband to deal with it and let him know and let him know you are asking for his help b/c you don't feel safe/comfy around his brother.

good luck

[Jffs24]

Tell your sister, end of it. Tell her he is acting strange with you, if he wants an affair he doesn't need to go within his wifes family to do it -- you owe her the truth about how he is making you feel and if you don't want to tell her tell your husband and he can talk to him. Either or.