Just bought a house together..now she's changed :((

[dv123]

Hi everyone
This is my first post on here so bear with me. Here's my story. Me and my girlfriend Katie have been together for three years and they have been great with lots of amazing memories with loving families and jobs. She is a gym instructor and I am a sea lion trainer. Just before Christmas we bought our first house. She was so happy when she found the house and was very excited about making that next step with me. It was a stressful time for her as its a big step for both of us but we got there and all was good. Life was sweet! Her job is very stressful and she has just started socialising with a group of people who are a bit younger than her and all single. She has begun neglecting me and the relationship along with her family, appearance etc. She looks ill, has a girly medical problem that she wont get sorted and her pay at work has been reduced. After a night out all of her friends including her stayed at one of the guys houses, I don't initially mind but then I thought we've just bought a house and I wasn't comfy abut her staying at a guys house. I wasn't angry with her but mentioned that I would prefer it if she came home. Since then she has had no regard for anyone or anything and has got more distant and doesn't make any plans anymore with me or even seem like she wants to be around me. It is a complete 180! Her folks are so disappointed in her as they invested a lot in the house too and everyone is puzzled by her behaviour. She is very close to her sister and she asked if there is anyone else and she said 'no I love Damion and want to be with him but I feel like I'm not good enough and that I keep hurting him with my actions'. The final straw was on Saturday when she went out and didn't even contact me all night. She came home the following morning a mess saying that she got really drunk and made an idiot of herself in pub by being sick!! This is completely opposite to what she is normally like. A very caring, career driven, mature head strong girl. I asked her to pack her stuff and leave the house as she had over stepped the mark. It killed me seeing her sitting on the floor sobbing her heart out but I had no choice, she's been hurting me for too long. She is now living back at her parents and they say she is very quiet and upset. I am leaving her alone now as she says she is 'flat, lost and confused'..maybe she is having a reality check about the house when all her single mates are free to do what they want, or maybe her feelings have just gone, or maybe she is very stressed...am I doing the right thing by leaving her alone to figure it out?

[Hooo!]

what do you want?

[pcmaster]

I think you kicked her while she was down. She mught have drug problem. Anyway one of the wires are burnt andthere is finding to do which one. I thing she needs love now to heal and additional help to get well. She have a problem thats too big for her alone.

[melancholia]

I am not an addictions specialist and I highly doubt any of us subscribers are psychologists or psychiatrists who are equipped to diagnose, but it sounds like she is suffering with depression and an alcohol dependency problem that could lead to severe addiction. You may want to contact an addiction counselor so you can get better advice on how to approach this with her. Speak to a professional, as they are educated and properly equipped at handling this kind of problem and they can give you sound advice on what to do and how to approach your girlfriend on this situation.