Hello all, first post here. I am a 27 yr old Male, dating a 29 yr old female.
We've only been dating for around 4 months, and I'd say exclusive for 2. I guess I wouldn't consider myself an "amateur" dater, I've seen pretty much every cause and effect I can imagine in a relationship, and know when to hold my ground.
Up until about 3 weeks ago, everything was always pleasant. I have a very playful personality, and kept her on her toes a lot, and I reveled in her sweet gestures and sex appeal. She is a very confident woman and our chemistry was nearly a "love at first sight" deal, if such a thing exists.
So about 3 weeks the tests started. I would say something stupid, or playful, and she would put a very angry face on, when I confronted her on it, screaming would ensue. The screaming was mostly about the fact that I didn't know what I'd said, and didn't see it as a big deal. The first time, I thought deeply about what I'd said, gave her some space, and came in and apologized for being selfish (as I was being selfish, but didn't warrant a reaction to such an extent). Things seem to move on OK, but I was nearly traumatized by the sudden mood swing she dealt.
So on goes the relationship, as if she had more power as I folded to her sudden mood swing, and she begins to throw them more often. I tried to diffuse the situation in various ways, trying to figure out the goal of her irrationality. The only thing that seemed to work was completely ignoring her, and not acknowledging what a bitch she'd become in a split second. This worked but I wasn't happy, she would still be staring daggers at me as I moved onto a new topic, or when I saw her later after I left the room.
Now, some may say she wants to get rid of me. Well understand the woman still calls me every night when she's off work, asks me to come over, and is perfectly sweet for at least the first hour we're together. The problem is that I now feel like I'm walking on egg shells around her, and can't be myself. So this morning I walked out on her. She saw that I was upset and asked "are you upset?" I paused and looked at and her and before I could answer she said "Good". Completely unprovoked, she'd just been giving me an attitude all morning, so I told her I was upset "because you have absolutely no respect for me", and I left.
Now I know it's natural to be tested in various ways in a relationship, especially when you've become exclusive, but I've never seen the same sort of test go on for so long. It seems like she wants to control me with her attitude, or she's losing respect for me and I have no idea how to react at this point. My closest friend says I need to yell at her, put her in her place and walk out.
I haven't done this yet, and am reluctant only because in the beginning of the relationship she told me how much she hated fighting, was always with very controlling men, and her past relationships always failed because of constant fighting.
I don't know where our relationship stands now as I can't imagine her calling me to apologize, and calling me her would be folding unless I'm calling her to break up.
I guess I'm looking for a female perspective here, as I feel like I'm out of ideas. Any insight will be greatly appreciated!
