lol.
you're crazy.
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lol.
you're crazy.
I think you are showing signs of passive-aggressive behavior.
lol, soon enough all your friends will be passive aggressive, seriously, stop reading that shit
LOL, well I was kidding with misombra.
The point is that it's really easy to judge a situation when you are on the outside.
Not for the last 8 years at least, since I learnt more productive ways to express myself.Quote:
Originally Posted by Rollerderby [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
Do you think it might have been healthier to communicate to him your frustrations as they happened instead of building them up and releasing them all in one go?Quote:
Originally Posted by Rollerderby [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
well what was the point of you coming in a forum and telling us about the situation and asking what we think?Quote:
Originally Posted by Rollerderby [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mishanya [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rollerderby [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
There are times, when you experience emotions that are not able to be rationalized. For example: The dying and death of my father was the first time I have ever experienced emotions that I had no ****ing clue where they were coming from. Scary. And yes, I did need to express them fully instead of rationalizing them away. There is a process of grieving.
This case is not this extreme. But it's pretty damn close. This is not a friend. This person is like a sister. Read back a few posts. I already have acknowledged multiple times that while things can always have gone better than they did, that this is not a generic situation. Yes, it takes two people. But the point is, in all of our situations together, her and I, I am always fully at fault. In her eyes. The rational conversations we have had for years, have no leeway in her part.
Get it yet? Or do I need to find that picture of the man beating the horse and pin it up?
Misombra, when did I tell you you can't say what you think? I asked you to read something to get a fuller picture. You opted not to.
roller has the fact that you're completely insane managed to escape your attention?
(lol i got that from 10 things i hate about you.)
Lol, I love that movie. But Bianca isn't exactly sane, either.
I think we're going to have to agree to disagree on this one. I think the fact that you have begun name calling me, is really childish and immature. Care to tell me why I'm insane?
Rollerderby this thread has dropped my opinion of you by about 50 points. And it wasn't that high to begin with.
Is it really necessary to say that, Charlie Boy? How is that constructive?Quote:
Originally Posted by Charlie Boy II [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
For what it's worth, I admire Rollerderby for sticking to her principles and not letting all of you bully her into feeling bad. Maybe she was in the wrong, and maybe she'll change her mind about the situation after she cools down, but I personally don't think she did anything that bad, besides maybe pushing too hard when it would've been wiser to wait for a better time.
ah cb doesn't understand, he has no feelings, ain't that right cb
roller, i can understand your situation. sometimes when someone just stands there and doesn't say a word it gets you more angry and you start exploting.
i have also learned that when this happens i go walk off a sec and come back and say lets talk im relaxed. this person obviously cares about your opinion and got a little angry facing reality just she preffered to escape, and probably the best choice.
i can't see how this is a termination to a friendship, you didnt kill her or anything. Just call her up say i was hurt can we talk correctly? if she says yes, go ahead and right down everything and tell her in a nice manner, dont explode. fix it.
if she says no, just leave the situation and coninue your life, im sure she will call you up in very little time.
Charlieboy, my life is RUINED because of what you think of me. JUST RUINED!!! I mean, I thought it was hard having this fight with my best friend. But YOU! MY LORD!!!!! Please don't give up on me!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU ARE MY LIGHT!!!!! You LIGHT UP MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!
eh, or you can go **** off.
^^ no point derby, have a read of this and you'll understand
[url]http://www.loveforum.net/off-topic-discussion/25627-i-think-i-want-get-my-heart-broken.html[/url]
yikes is there an underlining feud goin' on???
i think lovejoy says quite a number of good things and i don't see what she said here was in any way incorrect. but cb doesn;t get emotions so therein lies the miscommunication. it's not like it matters anyway
Actually, you're the one who started the PM-sending, doll. Want me to root that up? :)Quote:
Originally Posted by IndiReloaded [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
CB can stir the pot all he wants. I couldn't care less. I'm entitled to defend Rollerderby if I feel like it, and ask CB what he means to accomplish by publicizing his "Point system for Degree of respect for board members".
And for heaven's sake, do you think "joya" is a word? At least consult a dictionary before you start thinking up your own abbreviations.
LJA
Eco, LOL on that post.
Indi, I have noticed that your posts have seemed a little flip-floppy in this thread. But hey, I'm glad you care more about your own personal vendetta with Gottfried and now Lovejoy, to side with Charlie in his bullshit post to me. I mean, that's only the RATIONAL LOGICAL thing to do, right? I think whenever someone says something to you you don't like, you call it stirring the pot. I think when you stir the pot, it's just fine and dandy in your mind.
And to Charlieboy- I'm sorry you feel so lifeless inside. Maybe if you didn't you would understand what I was feeling with my friend. I think if you want to have your heart broken, you need to practice empathy first.
Quote:
Originally Posted by IndiReloaded [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
Is this your quick wit in disguise? [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
Sorry for derailing your thread, Roller.
LJA is 10-7 for the evening. Out.
Quote:
Originally Posted by IndiReloaded [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
These two quotes seem a little contradictory, but then again you yourself stated that you got an average score on your EQ. I imagine Charlieboy would tank.Quote:
Originally Posted by IndiReloaded [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
Please, also flip to page three, post number 42. I have already acknowledged everything. I think it's really hilarious how people keep saying I haven't. But anyway, I'm out of this thread, if you guys want to fight about other shit, go right ahead.
[url]http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=internet+drama[/url]
This one is more for online gamers, but I think it applies here. There is a quote from this link below.
[url]http://wadewilson.livejournal.com/11285.html[/url]
"How do you combat the dreaded scourge of Internet Drama?
If you wish to stop misunderstandings, misconceptions and miscommunications from festering until they explode into Internet Drama, which no one intelligent enjoys, it is important to remember The 3 Ps.
P1.) Perspective.
Perspective, as used here, is defined as the choice of a context or a reference from which to sense, categorize, measure or codify experience. In other words, the filter through which you will view a person, place, thing, idea or event.
Many users of the internets tend to make the mistake of viewing each particular questionable incidence within the series of tubes through only one perspective - their own initial perspective. If left unchecked and unmitigated, this initial perspective, if negative, can build upon itself until it becomes a full-blown irrational response.
Most children's television and common sense will tell you to consider more than that - the perspectives of the other people involved. You may feel wronged, but they may feel just as wronged, or may just perhaps be unaware that you would feel wronged by something they did.
And so on.
These are important to take note of, these other perspectives on what has galled you. However, the perspective I speak of is a grander scheme."
Oh, here is a quote that links directly from what we have discussed here. This is from the link above.
"P2.) Passive Aggression (Don't Do It)
Passive aggression, as defined here, is the highly annoying and frustrating tactic of saying the opposite of what you mean in order to keep discussions peaceful and not appearing to be a troublemaker or to cause conflict, but implying heavily what you really mean through dissembling, indirect speech and the spreading of guilt to others for having opinions that differ from yours. This isn't necessarily a conscious behavior, as those exhibiting it may honestly be trying to keep the peace rather than being deceptive, but one must be on guard for this.
At least three quarters of every tube within the Internets is stuffed full of passive aggressive people, because the Internets allow the aggression of interacting with people while also necessitating the passivity of not having to look at or hear the people you are interacting with. People who spend a lot of time on the Internets are, in a general sense, not good at and don't entirely grasp the workings of interpersonal relationships. It helps to remember this, and respond accordingly when confronted with these situations.
Honesty and flexibility are required to combat this problem. You have to be able to be honest without being a self-righteous dick about it. It may rankle one's sense of justice, but there's a difference between coddling someone and just being polite and disarming. Couching your statements in language that indicates you're not being insulting or goading goes a long way towards keeping emotions at an even keel. Sometimes it's a subtle thing, other times, it's obvious."
Which would you rather see in response to something you've written?
"Sorry, let me clarify, I actually meant that I find melted cheese to be a delicious substitute for personal lubricants."
or
"You misunderstand. I clearly meant that melted cheese is great lube, but you've misconstrued what I said."
Both statements saying the same thing, but the former is not assigning blame or being condescending, and is a polite way to defuse a potential annoyance while furthering a calm debate.
"Those exhibiting passive-aggressive behavior have trouble adhering to this notion, as well as the rule of keeping a proper perspective. If an argumentative and mildly condescending post like the latter example above does manage to get through someone's personal manners-filter, perhaps defensive in tone but clearly on a relatively insignificant and harmless topic, the passive-aggressive person will often overreact to this terrifying threat of confrontation, retreating with over-concession and massive abuse of the smiley emoticon until it reeks of insincerity.
"I'm sorry, you're right. :)"
"Really, it's okay. :) Cheese is probably much better than what I was thinking. :)"
"In fact, maybe I'll go get some cheese :) Try it out :) Prove you right :) Never mind what I said :)"
This would be the passive part. They will not go get cheese or try it out.
This is followed later by statements like:
"Wow, this cheese is... never mind. No, whatever people want is fine. No, it's just... it's fine. Whatever, it's fine. :) I mean, I've never used it and won't so I don't really feel like I'm... but whatever, it's fine. I thought we were going to use the other thing, but it's fine. :) Just tell me what you want me to do. :)"
Repeated occurrences of this sort of thing have the effect of spreading guilt for disagreeing with the person, while at the same time serving to derail and drag down the cheese lubricant scene until it's no fun for anyone involved, even the people that enjoy cheese, because it can eventually come to feel like pulling teeth to get a solid, unequivocal response. The PA person may feel as though they're being peaceful and mitigating and a good sport, and on the surface, that's what the words mean, but in actuality, it serves to frustrate the people trying to work with them because this is actually the PA person constantly waving the "I AM NOT ENJOYING MYSELF" flag, which tends to destroy fun.
There are ways to have a civil debate without tempers flaring, but it requires honesty - the polite sort of honesty discussed above (as well as perhaps some cooling-off time before the debate, to vent negative emotions). If an honest impasse is reached after such a thing, well, this is where flexibility comes in. Perspective helps to realize any big impasse about a role-playing game on the Internets is really not THAT important to be stubborn about, and being flexible enough to find a workable compromise helps to legitimately keep the peace. It also requires you do not then proceed to start whining, however subtly, about not getting your way. This is key. This is called being an adult. "
LOL derby, that was perfect! now people, you've been told! lol
you must have a lot of time on your hands to be writing out all that stuff.
I just haven't been feeling it lately.