BFs ex is seriously a sociopath

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by vashti [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

It just makes me sad. This young girl has had her family ripped apart. Her mother is despicable, and her dad acts like she's in the military. To top it all off, she has both parents dragging new people (with new kids!) around in HER home, none of this with her consent. And BTW - she's supposed to be happy about it so the adults don't have to actually feel BAD for what they have done to her life. I would be furious and acting out, too. Icing on the cake is to have dad's new honey running around calling her a liar. Jeezus, have a heart. This girl didn't become a mess on her own.

---

It's not like that at all! Her mom left for another man, for like the 50th time, no one knows what to do about the behavior cause nothing works! Dad didn't drag me and my son into her life without her consent, we took things very slow. She's not an angel and this whole post was supposed to be about the mother. The mother's BS has rubbed off on her, and thats no one's fault but the mothers. I would hope to find a way to get past this, as none of the adults can figure it out, I would hope that if I came to a "relationship advice forum" that people would help and not put so much judgement into it. You have no idea what this woman has done to this man or her kids, shes the devil!

What else am I supposed to call her after last night? There was a phone call to the house, someone prank called, pretended to be her mom. I called, she acted funny, said mom called looking for dad, dad is at work, everyone knows that, why is mom calling the house looking for dad? She thought he had today off. Dad calls me, asks me if I called the house, I said yes and told him what was said... I get home. More about the funny prank call comes out. Mom said it must have been me. I asked her if she was sure her mom said that cause the woman had to check her own phone to make sure she didn't make any calls because she is loopy from pain meds. No, Mom really said it must have been you. I sent mom a text, mom calls the house, and then we get the truth about it all, at least we think? Mom never said it. Later that night, Dad, Mom and I had a chat. Mom and I are trying to get along, but the oldest is making it rough by pinning us against each other. NO ONE knows what to do about the lying, it is getting out of control, the therapist isn't helping and they are talking about behavior specialists!

The problem is, the girl is acting like her mother, no on knows what really is going on because neither one can tell the truth. The kids know why mom and dad are getting a divorce, it's cause she likes to sleep around, although mom states it's something totally different, and no where near any reason to cheat on a man non stop for 10 years with who knows how many men!

Continue on the path you are on and you will get where you are going.

What you are doing isn't working. So, you must try something else. Or get exactly where you don't want to go, per the old quote^.

I already told you 2 posts up what to do to change the dynamic. YOU are the adult, tho this girl has figured out your buttons well enough to push them. Are you smarter than the child, or not?

You need to step back and let dad take the active role in things. So far, you have set yourself up as 'bad cop', and are just shooting yourself in the foot. Why would you text the mom? I wouldn't; I would have let dad know there was a call/msg & he should deal with it.

You may not be the direct source of the problem, but you don't know how to defuse situations either. It requires some self-control on your part, to disengage from things, but I would strongly suggest you try. I'll post a link you can use to help. But remember: if you want a particular behaviour from this girl, you need to convince her why its a good thing for her. Otherwise, why should she listen to you?

Good luck.

[url]http://conflict911.com/guestconflict/resolveconflictusebedrolmethod.htm[/url]