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Lol, I can see why you'd think I was trying to get out of it. Honestly not. I'm just somewhat worried about tying up the line but I guess you're right. Is it OK if I keep the phone conversation a bit above brief?
Also, I don't quite know what to ask during the second/re-do phone call...I am not a good phone person at all.
Have some questions let her talk and tell a joke, ask her to tell a joke too. Compliment her voice lol.
I think I'll definitely do that (compliment her voice). Not a naturally hilarious guy, though; especially not on the spot. Damn,,
Don't "ask her to tell a joke" That's lame IMO. Humour should be spontaneous and it shouldn't be about "telling jokes" It would go over much better if it was just something silly about what has been said between the two of you or something within her profile that can be innocently made fun with. Complimenting her voice can be cool as long as you don't come off as trying to start something verbally sexual. Just a little flirty... (for now ;))
BTW: You can be spontaneously witty. You've shown that side of you here in this forum on several ocassions.
Then just tell her you're not a good phone person when it comes to "getting to know you" type convos so if you are asking too many questions that would be why. Then just sequence into a question about her. Like: "So, tell me about yourself?" What does (insert name here) do for fun?"Quote:
Originally Posted by Love'sReject [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
You would do well to get a part-time job in sales where you have to talk to people. It will help you handle all situations with more confidence which means you'll transition your convos with an easy flow of back and forths.
You're doing well.. keep on, keeping on. :)
Her profile was written so that it already described herself adequately and what does for fun..leaving me kind of in a hole. I get what you're saying and would totally ask those of any girl who's number I had whose profile left those areas open to ask about..
Without reading a single other post in this thread, this looks like an excuse.Quote:
Originally Posted by Love'sReject [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
Lol, wtf? It wasn't meant to. I am trying really, really hard. In fact, I begin to wonder if something is wrong with me that it requires this much effort, planning and consulting.
Yes, there is something wrong with you... you are over-analyzing all of this. This doesn't require much effort and planning. The more you think about what you're gonna say or do, the more awkward and ****ed up it's gonna be. Just be yourself, relax, go with the flow.
Just get her to talk about herself and keep her going. Remember the Dale Carnegie book. Most women don't wanna hear what a guy has to say, and if they do, they'll ask. Anyway, most of them already know what we're thinking.
Why is tying up a family landline so concerning? I'm a parent and I couldn't give a toss if my kids tie up the landline. It's not like I need it for dial-up internet. If someone wants me and the phone is busy, they'll call my mobile instead. You're having issues with something so incredibly insignificant.Quote:
Originally Posted by Love'sReject [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
Besides, isn't the phone call only to organise a date? It will take 5 mins max. But if you do find yourself in a flow of talking....just go with it.
Yeah, I'd thought of it only to organize a date...She mentioned in her profile about going slow, so this is on top of other things that have me kinda off my proverbial game.
Hm, didn't answer at the agreed upon time...Trying not to rush to conclusions, but these stick out to me: a) this is some kind of a game b) she changed her mind c) she was talking to another, better guy
Even if all three are true it doesn't mean that you should be anything more then slightly disappointed. Keep looking and sending out messages to other girls until you meet this one. If you never meet her, then you'll have other options to consider.
Don't put all your eggs in one basket at this point.
To add: Did you leave a message for her to give you a ring back when it was convenient for her?
Maybe she's playing hard to get.
I'll try again tomorrow.. I'd be very disappointed. Although I tried not to get too excited, I kinda celebrated it somewhat publicly that I got a phone number (on FB). If it turns out to be a dead end again....I haven't even received a response from the other girl that had the decency to reply.
Well, you can't tell the next group of new forum members that when you online dated you got zero responses. That's one step up. :)
If you're "very disappointed" then you're expectations are too high for what's transpired this far. Keep it in perspective or you'll shoot your self in the foot in the emotional sense.
I guess I must be a **** up. Now I know with a certainty that the other girl has no intentions to respond. :(
Well then if you know for certain, that's a positive. Now you can get onto the next one without worrying about her anymore.
NEXT!
That would ordinarily be the case...but something must've gone REAL wrong (i.e., my second message was incredibly lame): she initiated something by rating my profile with high regard. Whatever the problem is, if I don't find out what it is and get better at that, then all I will have is a decent enough first message and no substantial ability to send a second..
Well, nowadays, when you get a number, you are supposed to text back and forth for a while. They use this to screen you to see if they even want to talk to you or not.
Not sure if it's a landline or cell, though...and I did call about a half hr. ago. Should I follow up with a text, then? My gut says probably not.
Pretty much what I was thinking.Quote:
Originally Posted by Wakeup [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
I would send a text saying something like "I tried to call you, but you didn't answer." That way she knows you are a man of your word and it puts the ball in her court.
Then send a text to it. If it doesn't accept texts, most cell phone providers have a bounce-back message.Quote:
Originally Posted by Love'sReject [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
If you didn't leave a VM, send her a text that says "tried to call, got no answer. Hope everything's alright."
LOL, jinx Dem86!
Those both sound good. Conflicted as to which to use; don't want to sound dramatic, obsessive or controlling..
Just send a short text.
Beginning to wonder if this isn't actually for the best...Maybe I don't have the mental pathways it requires to talk to girls. The cosmos is easier to understand than girls..
Ya gotta develop your mental pathways. Learning doesn't just mean school.
Neither one sounds controlling or dramatic, just informative. Lets her know you tried, and want to make sure everything's alright.
I wouldn't send her anything else via telephone. Email her through the site again and tell her you called but it went to voice mail and if it's more convenient for her to call you when she can then please do.
Then forget about her and go onto the next gal that's within commute distance to you.
If only there were an affordable camp or something...
huh?.......
A camp for training guys how to talk to girls..
There is.. It's called Youtube or just google... How to Pick up Girls.
Here you go LR:Quote:
Originally Posted by Wakeup [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
http://lmgtfy.com/?q=How+to+Pick+up+Girls
I wouldn't go back to the site. That's a step backwards. The goal of the site is to get the number. The goal of the number is to arrange a meeting. The goal of a meeting is to set up a date. The goal of the date is to.... usually it is to get in her pants, but let's just say "get to know her better."
Each date actually has a goal. The first date is to set up for the second date. The second for the third. She doesn't know this, but you gotta constantly do reconnaissance for your next step. Find out what she likes and dislikes and build your next contact around that. Don't fret it. You're a guy. This is naturally engrained. It comes with the spacial skills and map reading skills.
It's only a step backwards if he's accomplished a step forward, no?
So no response to the text...Call tomorrow same time as one last shot?
If it fails, this'll be a devastating blow. She is/was soooo pretty and seemed to have the qualities I look for (and which are rare)
True. But he got her number already. If he goes back to the dating site, he will be competing with the 5-10 e-mails per day that she gets from other anonymous guys. He has already advanced to level 2. There is less competition at the texting/phone level, but the stakes are higher.Quote:
Originally Posted by Wakeup [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]