Giving up...

I've been heads over heels in love with this girl for about 4 months now. We've been out once, which was an "alright" experience, wasn't the best date that i could've hoped for. Right now we are pretty much just friends. We talk on IM quite frequently when she's on, but the problem is, she hardly ever is on... which leads me to suspect that she's not very enthusiastic about chatting with me. I've asked her to go to two parties with my friends, but so far she's turned them all down with excuses that I think sounds quite phoney. I've tried chatting with her on the phone, but she's never too enthusiastic either... awkward silences galore.

I still like this girl, but just not with the same intensity i had 2 months ago. (time cures all, right?). My friends and I are seeing another movie this weekend.. I'm really fed up with her cold shoulders, since i'm pretty much convinced she's not interested in me any more than a friend. But i still kinda want to ask her to my senior prom (not sure yet).

Should I just forget her and not ask her this weekend? i think one thing she dislikes is going to movies with a buncha strangers beside me... but i guess i'm not her brain, so i don't know...

ps: nothing with this girl can last for more than another 3 months.. cause i'll be gone for college. so probably not worth it right?

In my opinion, you should treat her like shit and pretend like you just don't care about her.

That'll get her attention ;)

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Originally Posted by LTsK8eR2gO

In my opinion, you should treat her like shit and pretend like you just don't care about her.

That'll get her attention ;)

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Wow, that's what I thought too. And if it doesnt, sorry pal, find someone else.

Two great 15 year old minds think alike :baby:

haha ya that advice is mean.

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Originally Posted by Off2College

haha ya that advice is mean.

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Yep. OV has a theory that girls like being treated like shit. It seems that their actions tell us more than their words :P

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Originally Posted by LTsK8eR2gO

In my opinion, you should treat her like shit and pretend like you just don't care about her.

That'll get her attention ;)

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Well.. not treat her like shit, but more or less, that is the vibe you should give off..

I still don't think it's too late.. Think of it this way.. You want to brag that you did something that not too many people could.. Examples: get into a tight security club, rub lotion over aishwarya rai while she prepped for a photoshoot, or go to the prom with the "looser" crowd..

Well, for women, this is really the story.. If you can have something, and especially if it asks you to have it, then it's probably not "cool" or desirable enough to be had, because if it was, it would not be available.. That something is YOU.. If you beg, which is what you do when you ask, then you are less desirable than poop on a stick..
Just imagine if there was no security to a club that served fruit punch and played music from the 70's.. wanna go?? imagine if it's george bush's wife you have to rub down with lotion? now all of a sudden, it seems like your offer to go to the prom with the looser crowd..

this is what it seems like in the eyes of women.. and no, I swear, i'm not a chick..
So, it all becomes a question of how to market yourself.. the LESS available u are.. the MORE desirable u'll be.. When she asks u about what ur doing for the prom, DO NOT say nothing, or that u'll be helping needy kids in Turkey.. Say something that's cocky-funny.. like.. "i still can't believe i can only pick one out of everyone who's begged me to go to the prom with me".. (sarcastic please) u need to make it funny..

P.S. DO NOT ASK what she is doing: you could not give a flying crap about her.. remember, nice guys finish last, and this is the rule of highschool to remember..

:french:

Find a new girl to like!

wow u guys are so mean.

i thought u shouldn't believe the phrase, "if u love someone, let her go. if she comes back, then she's real. if not, then move on.. or something like that"

I mean, what if u really start acting cold, and she thinks ur acting cold, and she acts cold back??

blah u guys make this relationship stuff needlessly complicated (me thinks)

If she's not after you, find someone else who is. How is that mean? Stop feeling crappy about this. Some girls have an idiotic way of playing hard to get, I just stop trying then.

ya its funny, cause when i did start acting cold towards her, she starts warming up and at least starts paying attention to me... ie look, talk, even touch me.

yup yup..

so predictable.. so savage.. so woman-ish..

u treat them like a godess.. they enjoy the free ride.. u treat them like crap and give them no attention.. all of a sudden they WANT YOU like you're the last man on earth..

however, i must note.. these are the low-life girls, who's main objective in life, is to find a guy to leech off of in order to survive..

if that's what you're going for.. then whatever makes u happy.. but think about it.. people don't just develop traits out of the blue.. these are survival characteristics in women.. certain women.. not all...

and they are to attract attention.. the easier it is to get attention from a male.. the less worth her time he must be.. the harder it is.. the more valuable he should be in theory.. so the game begins..

think about it wisely.. do you really want to attract a leech's attention?? or do you actually want to find a significant other who is actually worth your time and life??

:french:

I don't think you all need to be so hostile. It sounds like she likes you as a friend, but not a boyfriend. Of course she pays more attention to you when you are acting like an ass. She probably cares about your feelings, (even though she isn't in to you) and is trying to warm you up a bit.

Why don't you try just being direct about what it is you want, and stop trying to manipulate her? That way you will have an answer without playing all these silly games.

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Originally Posted by vashti

Why don't you try just being direct about what it is you want, and stop trying to manipulate her? That way you will have an answer without playing all these silly games.

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As soon as girls stop doing it, guys will stop.

As soon as guys stop doing it, girls will stop.


It's an endless cycle. Both sides do it. It won't stop. Unfortunately.

ahh.. yeah.. ok.. lol

why play a fair and honest game when your opponent is cheating???

see.. if women would play fair and honest, there would be no need for COUNTER-manipulation..

however.. this particular species of female, sounds like she is of the classic kind that desires attention, and has a fixed system of rules when she is looking for a partner..

her selectiveness is based on basic rules of engagment.. if he wants me badly.. that must mean that i'm supurior to him, and he is not worth my time.. if he doesn't want me or doesn't bother to pay attention.. then.. he must be more than worth my time.. and maybe he just doesn't notice me enough..

this gives this type of female the chance to get creative in presenting herself.. since she can now "in her own mind" make a KILLER first impression..

there is no playing fair.. guys who want this type of girl.. and know the rules.. MUST start ignoring, treating her like crap, and acting like she is not worth their time.. if they do otherwise.. such as be honest and share true feelings.. they give up any chance they have of having a relationship or whatever they want to have.. with this type of girl..

:french:

LOL - boy, you guys sure overthink things.

Yes, you could choose to continue to play games, or you can get a quick, direct answer. Your choice.

Seriously No wonder guys have such a hard time figuring woman out...Look at the advice they are given.. pfft!

In any case, I agree with Vashti...and that you should not play games with anyone. Why? So what if they are doing it? That doesn't mean you need to, your just stooping to their level unless that's how you are.

So basically, either aceept that she's probably not that interested in you and just forget about her or ask her out more time with just you two. But I have to say it sounds to me like she's not interested in you dating wise!

ya that's true with stopping the stupid games and crap. WHY MAKE IT COMPLICATED?

Well i mean, i used to be heads over heels in love with this girl, but now, seeing there's only like 2 months left until i move away from my city for college, and most likely never to be back again for any long period of time, i think i am having an "easy" time getting over this one.

The only question is... should i ask her to grad? it seems kinda pointless relationship-wise since that would be one of the last times that i'll likely to ever see her again, and i think she's indirectly shown me that she will be going with her friends (this was like, 2 months ago). But... I mean... it's grad...