frigid bf?

my boyfriend and i have been going out for nearly 5 months. we're both 17.. i think i have had more experience with guys than he has with girls..

the problem is, i think he's frigid..

we've kissed so far and not much else except cuddling/spooning. but instead of what normal guys do, which is push for the next base since we've been going out for pretty long now, he seems clueless. sometimes i take the initiative to "direct his hand" but then he goes back to cuddling me instead. he doesnt seem to be very interested in me sexually? sometimes we talk about it -- and he says he is very interested

what is he thinking?

Maybe he simply isn't ready for sex.

Yeah, believe it or not, 17 is kinda young for sex. Kid might not be mature enough. Plus it can be intimidating your first time, doubly so if the girl's experienced and knows the difference between good sex and bad.

Damn man, wish my girlfriend was so forward.

but im not talking about sex... :surprised

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Originally Posted by wtrmln [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

but im not talking about sex... :surprised

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Oh, really? Where, exactly, are you directing his hand? Have you heard of foreplay? This sounds like foreplay. Foreplay leads to sex. Fast.

aw, he's not frigid, he's just sweet!
even if you actually just want a little foreplay without it leading to sex, he probably (rightly) thinks it will lead there, and he's not ready- or he's nervous.
You just have to be super patient with him. Most guys feel a *ton* of pressure and feel that they are expected to miraculously know how to do everything exactly right, or girls might think they're frigid or some silly stuff like that!

It might not be sex that you want but to him, it might as well be.

And I agree with Tiay. It IS a lot of pressure.
I remember my first time... she kept telling me that's not what she wanted but she sure seemed like it. I was very intimidated too cuz she was older and way more experienced...


Your boyfriend might not be the type to open up as fast. Some people take forever.. others take one night...

So... what do you really want from him? Initimacy or sex?

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Originally Posted by Frasbee [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Damn man, wish my girlfriend was so forward.

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lol, me too

whoever said that guys had to initiate everything... me *winks* at Tiay...

heh well.. there are no hard rules.

yes, there arent... its an art that i know nothing about... my very close friend keeps telling me that i dont know how to get the girl, where i might be the best guy she knows but i dont know how to actually get girl friends... so sad... lol

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Originally Posted by Frasbee [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Damn man, wish my girlfriend was so forward.

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I'll go further and say that I wish all girls were that forward.

Really? I thought it was your dream that all the girls in the world would have their vaginas fused together.

When I was 17, I remember my bf being really trepidatious about that stuff too. I know why though......his parents had him when they were 19, and he didnt want to go down that path. It IS a lot of pressure.

It doesn't help that women are (or perhaps the media makes them out to be) extremely picky about sex. You don't measure up. You don't move it the right way. You're done too fast... So much more pressure. All a woman's got to do is spread 'em and lie still for a few minutes.

Seventeen isn't too early! Hell, I was ready at 12. I think the guy is either gay -- but not aware of it -- or schizophrenic, or has some other psychological problem.

There are plenty of 17 year olds who haven't had sex yet. Maybe this one has some issues with casual sex related to religious conviction. Or, if he is smart, he is afraid of getting a girl pregnant.

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Originally Posted by Gribble [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

It doesn't help that women are (or perhaps the media makes them out to be) extremely picky about sex. You don't measure up. You don't move it the right way. You're done too fast... So much more pressure. All a woman's got to do is spread 'em and lie still for a few minutes.

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SOUNDS LIKE SOME WILD SEX:P

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Originally Posted by Gribble [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

It doesn't help that women are (or perhaps the media makes them out to be) extremely picky about sex. You don't measure up. You don't move it the right way. You're done too fast... So much more pressure. All a woman's got to do is spread 'em and lie still for a few minutes.

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never has it been so poeticaly put.

you are actually worried that he is taking a relationship seriousely?
would you rather he just used you for sex and nothing more?

he is probably worried about your feeling, worried about the fact you are experienced, worried that you seem to want it and worried that he'll do it wrong and with you r experience be able to tell