How To Approach A Girl.

Alright, im 17 first of all.
There is this girl that sits across from me in one my of classes, and she is pretty attractive.
Definately interested in getting to know her better.
I catch her looking at me/smiling at me some times, and we have caught eye contact a few times.
I want to go talk to her, but I dont know how to go about this.
Its the initial part that I struggle with, once we get talking it would be fine.

And I dont know anyone that knows her, nor is it an option to talk about the class. Any suggestions? And how to get her number?

Two steps.

Participate in class to make you look like you're interesting, smart and you'll stand out a bit so she notices you.

Set things up so you accidentally run into her after class, "Hey! Aren't you in my class?" introduce yourself, then it's easy from there.

It gets easier to meet girls in class once you're in college since you really have no assigned seats and can choose to sit next to them, haha.

:)

Thats true.
I think shes somewhat attracted to me, but is shy.
As for getting her number, should I just talk to her for 5-10min and then say something like "hey, ive gotta go, can I get your number?"
Any tips are appreciated, I just need to build up a bit more confidence to get this going. Initially starting the conversation will be the hardest.

go for it dude. just simply introduce urself say something like hey wanna hang out sometimes? and ask for her number.

"Hey wanna hang out sometimes? can I have your number?"

LOL! sorry dude, that is to funny by itself....and weird.




TS: Why don't you start off with a small flirt? See what her reaction is. What is important is that you pay attention to her body language and reaction.

Why don't you start by just saying hi and the rest is easy presumably. If she is interested in you she will keep talking to you in somewhat.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Only-virgins [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

"Hey wanna hang out sometimes? can I have your number?"

LOL! sorry dude, that is to funny by itself....and weird.




TS: Why don't you start off with a small flirt? See what her reaction is. What is important is that you pay attention to her body language and reaction.

---

its worked a couple times for me ;)

Jastela, approach her after class and introduce yourself. This shouldn't be difficult since she already smiles at you. Keep your conversation brief. I recommend no more than 2-3 min. max. The less she knows about you, the better.

"hi, my name is _____."

then she says her name. Shake her hand.

"How do you like (name of school)? What classes are you taking? etc"

find something you both like or dislike and talk about that. One of the best ways to instantly hit it off with a person is to agree on something.

"well, it was nice talking to you _____. I need to get going to my next class. We should hang out sometime."

girls love it when you remember their name. It shows you actually pay attention. By taking control of the conversation and you cutting it short instead of her, it makes you look more important. Purposely don't ask for her number at the end. Two reasons: 1) if she is interested, then she will give you her number 2) she will be expecting it b/c that's what every other guy would do. You need to stand out from everyone else. It will make her more attracted to you.

What Neo is suggesting might seem simple.., and the thought inside your head might be.., "that's it? really? what about some magic line? spell? voodoo? this would never work!".., but believe it or not.., it's very smooth and effective..

In sales.., the worst thing to do is try and sell something from your point of view.., you always have to go into the point of view of the buyer (her)..

Ask yourself this question.., (give this some serious thought).., If you were her.., and you really liked some guy in the class.., what would you do so that you could start dating him?

Go ahead.., think about it..

Well? ... Nothing huh?

Consider this now.., what if this guy suddenly came up to you.., and handed you a chance.., a rope.., an opportunity to start getting the ball rolling.., ANYTHING! It doesn't matter.., "sup?" or "were you listening when she was talking about ___? did you take notes on it? do you mind if I copy them after class? thanks.. I just focus on some things the teacher talks about sometimes and I end up lost in thought here and there.., and before you know it.., it seems like I skipped over 10 minutes of class.. have you ever had that happen do you?"

What would you do? Wouldn't you at least be excited? Wouldn't you feel a sense of relief that he did all the work and took away all that anxiety and pressure from how YOU are going to make things happen?

This is your gift to.., not just her.., but to all girls.. You have the ability to take away that anxiety and pressure.. You can escalate and make things progress.., you can set the pace.., and make it easy for her.., where all she has to do is follow..

Warning:

Women are the opposite of politicians..

If a politician says "YES".., he means "maybe".., if he says "MAYBE".., he means "no".., and if he says "NO".., then he feels like a bad politician..

If a woman says "NO".., she means "maybe".., if she says "MAYBE".., she means "yes".., and if she says "yes".., then she feels like a bad woman.., (i.e. "cheap".., "desperate".., "easy".., "slutty".., or as if she is projecting the message to everyone else including you that she likes you more than you like her)

It's a tragedy for both of you when your frame is too strong.., when you phrase things in such a way that it creates a lot of pressure.., and doesn't afford her any good excuse to deny to herself and her friends that "oh no.., we're not going out on a date.., he just wants me to show him the park next to his house".. When you ignore her comfort and place her in a high-pressure situation because you think it's the confident and honest thing to do.., then you've carelessly put her in the difficult (yes/no) dichotomy position.., whereby she "wants" to say "yes".., but saying it would make her feel and look (cheap, desperate, easy, slutty, etc).., so she's "forced" to say "no"..

So you have to structure your rope (like Neo already has) in such a way that you're simply "handing her the opportunity for her to grab on to".., but never "pressuring her to grab hold of the rope"..

In other words.., it's a "soft sell".., not a "hard sell".. At least at your age range.., If you start thinking about women in their 30's.., they're fed up with this childish indirect bullsh*t.., some of them might even feel insulted you think they wouldn't be able to handle a direct approach.., some of them might see it as you being dishonest or nervous instead of just trying to make them feel comfortable and ease any pressure.. (worry about that when the times comes)

Your biggest concern as of now is not "how you're going to get the ball rolling".., but..

1. Am I attractive to people who notice me? How can I improve this?
2. How will I get her to notice me

and then..

3. How will I get the ball rolling?

If you have the looks.., and you have a couple of other girls in the class talking about you who think you're cute.., then for all practical purposes.., you can ignore steps 1 & 2.. Because you'll fly by them anyway..

But if you don't think you're the type of person who can just fly by steps 1 & 2.., if you don't think your looks alone can take you directly to step 3.., then you might want to consider asking yourself a different question..

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by GrkScorp [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

What Neo is suggesting might seem simple.., and the thought inside your head might be.., "that's it? really? what about some magic line? spell? voodoo? this would never work!".., but believe it or not.., it's very smooth and effective..

In sales.., the worst thing to do is try and sell something from your point of view.., you always have to go into the point of view of the buyer (her)..

Ask yourself this question.., (give this some serious thought).., If you were her.., and you really liked some guy in the class.., what would you do so that you could start dating him?

Go ahead.., think about it..

Well? ... Nothing huh?

Consider this now.., what if this guy suddenly came up to you.., and handed you a chance.., a rope.., an opportunity to start getting the ball rolling.., ANYTHING! It doesn't matter.., "sup?" or "were you listening when she was talking about ___? did you take notes on it? do you mind if I copy them after class? thanks.. I just focus on some things the teacher talks about sometimes and I end up lost in thought here and there.., and before you know it.., it seems like I skipped over 10 minutes of class.. have you ever had that happen do you?"

What would you do? Wouldn't you at least be excited? Wouldn't you feel a sense of relief that he did all the work and took away all that anxiety and pressure from how YOU are going to make things happen?

This is your gift to.., not just her.., but to all girls.. You have the ability to take away that anxiety and pressure.. You can escalate and make things progress.., you can set the pace.., and make it easy for her.., where all she has to do is follow..

Warning:

Women are the opposite of politicians..

If a politician says "YES".., he means "maybe".., if he says "MAYBE".., he means "no".., and if he says "NO".., then he feels like a bad politician..

If a woman says "NO".., she means "maybe".., if she says "MAYBE".., she means "yes".., and if she says "yes".., then she feels like a bad woman.., (i.e. "cheap".., "desperate".., "easy".., "slutty".., or as if she is projecting the message to everyone else including you that she likes you more than you like her)

It's a tragedy for both of you when your frame is too strong.., when you phrase things in such a way that it creates a lot of pressure.., and doesn't afford her any good excuse to deny to herself and her friends that "oh no.., we're not going out on a date.., he just wants me to show him the park next to his house".. When you ignore her comfort and place her in a high-pressure situation because you think it's the confident and honest thing to do.., then you've carelessly put her in the difficult (yes/no) dichotomy position.., whereby she "wants" to say "yes".., but saying it would make her feel and look (cheap, desperate, easy, slutty, etc).., so she's "forced" to say "no"..

So you have to structure your rope (like Neo already has) in such a way that you're simply "handing her the opportunity for her to grab on to".., but never "pressuring her to grab hold of the rope"..

In other words.., it's a "soft sell".., not a "hard sell".. At least at your age range.., If you start thinking about women in their 30's.., they're fed up with this childish indirect bullsh*t.., some of them might even feel insulted you think they wouldn't be able to handle a direct approach.., some of them might see it as you being dishonest or nervous instead of just trying to make them feel comfortable and ease any pressure.. (worry about that when the times comes)

Your biggest concern as of now is not "how you're going to get the ball rolling".., but..

1. Am I attractive to people who notice me? How can I improve this?
2. How will I get her to notice me

and then..

3. How will I get the ball rolling?

If you have the looks.., and you have a couple of other girls in the class talking about you who think you're cute.., then for all practical purposes.., you can ignore steps 1 & 2.. Because you'll fly by them anyway..

But if you don't think you're the type of person who can just fly by steps 1 & 2.., if you don't think your looks alone can take you directly to step 3.., then you might want to consider asking yourself a different question..

---

For a bigger challenge.
Now how would one do it to a complete stranger on the street. Like you spot her walking or like waiting for the lights to change and you spot a cute girl or sitting in a crowded bus???

This topic is great for information I was looking for :)
Im thinking ill talk to her on monday after class.
I almost feel like I should ask for her number though, even though what you are saying about not asking for it makes sense.
Because IF she was interested when I said we should hang out sometime, she would give me her number.
Hmm.

Don't ask her for her number yet! U crazy?
You'll run out of things to say and u'll be in that creepy silence!
Get her IM/MSN/ICQ/SKYPE and just chat with her online.... its way easier.... then you ask for her number!!

So just walk up to her! She won't bite.... just make sure you do it at the right moment.... during class notice her, see if she struggles with anything or in the hall... just approach her and say hey! that you are from her class and that you noticed her.... ask her if she likes your teacher..... if she likes the subject....stuff like that!
Cmon you can do it!

:)

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Jastela [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I almost feel like I should ask for her number though, even though what you are saying about not asking for it makes sense.
Because IF she was interested when I said we should hang out sometime, she would give me her number.

---

Not to bash Neo's advice.., but to simply add to it again..

I want you to picture a "half circle"..

On the left-most side.., are girls.., girls who are young and inexperienced.., some have had a boyfriend.., others.., believe it or not.., are still virgins..

On the top-middle part of the circle.., are teens and 20y/o girls who you can easily label "sophomores".. They've had their first taste of relationships and sex.., they've got their feet wet in the dating game.., and along with that follows guilt! Guilt you wouldn't understand unless you were a woman.. The guilt of not being pure anymore.. Remember.., image.., reputation.., character.., dignity and respect all matter to a woman..

On the right-most half of the circle.., are your women.., lower 20's and 30+.. It's safe to assume they've been around.., don't waste your time asking how many people she's been with.. (1) because you don't want to know.., (2) because no matter how many it is.., she'll always give you a number somewhere between 2-4.. Despite being a fan of a more direct.., less childish bullsh*t approach.., they also want to hold onto their respect and dignity.. They might be older.., they might not be the hot babe they once were.., but they still want to feel chased.., desired.., and wanted.. Even if she really likes you.., she doesn't want to feel or seem desperate and give you her number.. You HAVE to ask for it.., or else you're not getting it.., purely out of pride on her part.. One person has to put their delicate ego aside on this one.., and that person has to be you..

Despite stratifying the different categories by age.., age has very little to do with it.. That's like measuring education as a proxy for success.. Guess what.., education has a self-selecting sample of intelligent people.., who are.., well.., intelligent.. In this case.., age tends to have a self-selecting sample of experience.. You may find that a woman in her 30's is actually a freshman! You may also find that a woman in her teens is a senior! Just a matter of knowing where each woman figures into..

Number closes can work directly or indirectly.., but they'll never work by you doing "nothing".. If you don't give her the luxury of a direct #-close.., then at least provide a comfortable medium for an indirect #-close..

Indirect Example: (e-mail)

Pierce: I'll be in the city this Friday, because I have an interview to go to in the morning. If you're not too busy on Friday, why don't we meet up later? Have you ever been to Lanterna?

Jessica: So this is my plan for Friday, I have classes until 6, then I'm heading to Astoria to pick up my car and head to Long Island because a friend of mine is having a get-together that night. But, I can meet up with you for a while before I go. Will you still be in the city around 6? If not, do you want to meet up in Astoria? Have you ever been to the cafes on 30th ave?
I've been to Laterna a couple of times...I really like it! But it's better to go there evening hours when there is music... we should definitely plan that some other time!
If Friday doesn't work out for you, we can always do something next week! Let me know...

Pierce: I'll probably be done before 12 with the interview. I go to the cafes on 30th all the time! We'll meet up in Astoria after 6. Just let me know which cafe you have in mind! See you on Friday Jess..

Jessica: Ok, how about we meet at Avenue at 6?

Take my cell # (###)-###-#### and text me yours tomorrow so that we can find each other...
I won't have access to my computer most of the day...

See You Tomorrow!
___________________________________

I want you to notice everything that's going on here.. "subcommunication"..

It all boils down to diplomacy.., as my father told me when I was starting out as a Real Estate agent.., "diplomacy is the art of telling someone to go to hell.., in such a way that they can't wait for the trip!"

The indirect approach is an art form.., you should have fun with it.., there's really no pressure.., because if worse comes to worst.., you can just switch over to a more direct approach.. But the indirect approach allows you to gauge a lot of things about the other person.. (i.e. experience.., self esteem.., honesty.., interest.., motives.., etc)

Analysis:

Pierce starts off with a "no-bullsh*t" strait to the point opening after just meeting this girl for one night and having a 30 minute conversation with her.., exchanging e-mails.. He provides a reason why he'll be in the city (where she lives) and offers a very clear suggestion.., with a pretty obvious rope for her to grab onto..

Jessica has diarrhea of the mouth.., she likes Pierce.., is a bit inexperienced.., and is getting nervous but not trying to show it.. She throws ropes his way like they're on sale.., giving him plenty of chances and options.. If not in the city.., then in Astoria.., if not in Astoria.., then back in the city some other time.., if not there.., then maybe something next week! If Pierce is an idiot (don't laugh.., because I've had guys tell me this) he may think "she's not interested.., she doesn't want to go to Lanterna and is making excuses".. But Pierce has been around the block.., he "gets it".., and appreciates her openness.. and thinks her getting nervous but trying to hide it is cute..

Pierce CAN act on the opening here.. to ask for her number.., "why don't you give me your number so I know which cafe' you're going to be at".., but he doesn't.. Remember! Not because he's playing games! He does it because she's inexperienced and nervous.., he wants to make her comfortable and slow down the pace.., he doesn't want to pressure her! So he leaves the ball in her court as a courtesy to her.. He takes command and "tells" her where they are going to meet.., but still leaves her some choice.., letting her pick the cafe' she and her friends want to go to.. He ends by offering her a medium for her to give him her number!

Jessica jumps on the opportunity.., telegraphing to Pierce that she's not one to act coy or play games.., she just earned points.., and she ended to message with an excuse as to why she gave him her number.., "because she won't have access to a computer" and in case they can't find each other in an 800 sq.ft. cafe!

Note: If Pierce would've miscalibrated.., and placed Jessica in the "wrong type".., he may have mistakenly tried to go for an direct approach or hybrid.. If he would have done that.., one of two things or both may have happened..

1. She felt too much pressure.., and simply felt "no" to be a more comfortable answer.., even though she really wanted to say "yes"..

2. Pierce would never get valuable information to confirm his assumption about her type.., he would never see her getting nervous.., trying to hide it.., showing interest.., and not acting coy or difficult.., she would have never earned points in his mind so early in the game..

But as of now.., Pierce has a date this Friday.. :D

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Henry123 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Now how would one do it to a complete stranger on the street. Like you spot her walking or like waiting for the lights to change and you spot a cute girl or sitting in a crowded bus???

---

There's a wealth of literature on this.., but I suspect you're looking in the wrong places..

- Marketing (Management & Strategy)
- Consumer Behavior
- Organizational Behavior
- Behavioral Economics & Finance
- Advertising & Sales (Persuasion & Promotion)

"How do we market a product or service to complete strangers?"

"How do we grab hold of their interest?"

"How do we engage their curiosity and make them want to know more?"

"How do we get them even more interested and maintain that interest?"

"How do we set ourselves apart from the rest of the market?" (Blue Ocean Strategy)

"How do we motivate a buyer and translate that into a sale?"
__________________________________________________ ______________________

Now.., is the dating market really any different?

Think of yourself as a commodity.. a portfolio of assets.., human capital.., and qualities.. That's who you are.., and there's a marketplace you can sell yourself in exchange for an other commodity.., There is a certain demand for your portfolio of assets based on evolutionary biology.., social engineering and cultural practices..

Despite what you may have been lead to believe by an American media that uses "sex" to sell.. This tends to determine the survival rate of offspring..

Erotic & Physical Capital: 20%
Emotional & Intellectual Capital: 30%
Financial & Social Capital: 50%

Now.., fortunately for women.., we live in a hypersexualized culture where from a very young age.., men are conditioned to think of women as sex objects.. This becomes their life-long meta-model for how they respond to very attractive women.. Which means.., that men will ignore a woman's Financial & Social Capital value.., place less emphasis on her Emotional & Intellectual Capital value.., and focus on her Erotic & Physical Capital value.. Making the revealed preferences of men look something like:

Erotic & Physical Capital: 90%
Emotional & Intellectual Capital: 10%
Financial & Social Capital: Who cares?

Eventually.., after a guy gives in to all the advertising and marketing.., somewhere around his 4th or 6th girl he realizes that they're all pretty much the same.., whether she's screaming or silent.., moving or still.., hot or normal.., it doesn't make a difference for his d*ck.., it still feels the same.. So he starts to wonder.., "sex is not all it's cut out to be.., so what am I REALLY looking for?".., that's when the light dawns on his male mind.., "children.., family.., marriage".. His preferences for commodities on the dating market change..

Erotic & Physical Capital: 50% (Hey.., it's a HUGE decrease)
Emotional & Intellectual Capital: 40%
Financial & Social Capital: 10% (Mostly.., he doesn't want to marry someone everyone else has slept with)

So now that you have an idea about the preferences.., you can start to think about a couple of things..

Guys talking about a girl he's interested in to his friends:

- She's so thin and in shape
- She dresses really sexy
- She's got the whole T & A package
- Supermodel legs and blow-job lips
- These amazing eyes and her soft voice
- Ugh.., and she's normal! No drama!

(Dude.., that's awesome.., sounds like a keeper)

Girls talking about a guy she's interested in to her friends:

- He's really really cute
- He takes care of himself and knows how to dress well
- His parents are loaded! Their net asset value is close to $30 million.., I asked the bank for financial statements..
- Yeah.., plus he's an attorney.., making 6 figures a year!
- Has his own car and place.., plus a vacation home in the Hamptons!
- And he's ok.., I guess he's nice and all

(Ugh! You're so lucky!)

Be friendly.
Be nice.
Be approachable.

Say hi to her.
Introduce to yourself .
Tell her that you want to have friends
thats why you approach her.

But all jokes aside.., It's not what goes on externally that's important.., but what goes on internally that's interesting..

As a guy.., a woman could have all the money in the world.., it wouldn't make her more attractive.. I don't know any guy who looks at Oprah and thinks.. "oh baby! I'd spread my legs for her just to have the peace of mind of a secure future for the rest of my life for me and my children".. That doesn't happen..

But can a supermodel look at someone like Donald Trump and say.., "sure I'll marry him!"??? :P

Let's be honest here.., There's no shame in this.., Just because it's funny doesn't make her a gold-digger or shallow.. But when she finds out that this cute guy (or at least "not ugly") is packing on some serious currency in his accounts.., or comes from a family with a lot of old money.., She doesn't know why.., but all of a sudden.., she finds yourself more motivated to start a relationship with him and go on a hot pursuit after him.. And honestly.., there's nothing wrong with that.., there's nothing wrong with her fantasies of a secure and stable future for her and her children.., that's not what makes her a gold-digger.. What makes her a gold-digger is if her only motives for pursuing him either directly or indirectly are for his money.., what makes her a whore is if she is making herself sexually available to him just to get to his money.. But genuinely being more motivated to someone for their money as simply an added bonus is normal and natural..

Yes yes.., I know.., you can't just say that! Very few women can be that honest with themselves and everyone else.. So you have to answer the question of "why am I interested in him?".. Or else either he.., his friends.., his family.., or your girlfriends will catch onto why you're really interested in him.., and that might make you look bad.. So you have to say.., "no no.., it's because he's cute" or "he's just such a nice person.., we really had that connection" or "he's very smart and intelligent.., I never go for the strong and buff popular guys.., I always had the hots for the skinny & scrawny unpopular kids in my class"..

There's nothing wrong with that.. I don't like the view of some men who look at this and turn around to say something obnoxious like.. "aha! all women are whores!".. Yes.., it's true.., whores are in the business of spreading their legs for money.., and women in hot pursuit of high-net-worth men are counting on their looks and sex to get them the guy.., they are COUNTING on it.., if it doesn't work.., they have no other means of getting the guy! They have NOTHING else to offer him! (note: did you ever wonder why women place so much weight on the way they look? did you ever notice which kind of women they usually are? Not exactly doctors or lawyers..)

The reason I say there's nothing wrong with that is because I can easily make the argument and case for women that.., "If you're desperate or stupid as a man.., then you'll fall for it.., so unless you don't have money.., stop b*tching and start enjoying being the hunted and pursued.., just don't be too much of a d*ck about it.. Pretend you're clueless and unaware of all your wealth.., that won't intimidate her.. and it won't make you seem out of reach or self-absorbed.. It'll make your life easier.."

The transaction:

90% survivability meets 70% survivability.., children? A little more than 80% survivability (because of dominant & recessive genes)

The negotiation dance:

- She sees you and believes she has all this sexual power over you.. Don't get upset.., she has reason to believe she does.. The media.., other women encourage her and tell her so.., and there are plenty of men out there who are just looking for sex and will do anything to get it (desperate).. So you can't be upset if she has such thoughts in her mind.., you can't let it get to you if she looks at you like she's doing you a favor by even talking to you.. That should signal something to you.., but under no circumstances should it get you upset.., because if you've been around and have any considerable experience.., sex is the last thing on your mind.., and the only thing that gets you upset is that you see a beautiful girl who is degrading her own value down to just sex..
- You see her.., and think she's just after your money.. While in probability this may be true.., who the hell are you to conclude that this particular girl is only interested in you for your money? You haven't even talked to her yet! (also: if you make under 6 figures a year and have a net worth of under $1 million.., or if your family's NAV is less than $5 million.., just do yourself the favor and cool it.., she's not after you because of your money.. so relax).. Unfortunately for so many great women out there.., there are always a few that will only be interested in men who provide a free pass on life.., and are still sexually desperate.., frustrated and unfulfilled.. Because they can always tell themselves and those around them that they like something else about you.., they'll never have to live with the guilt of dating you or marrying you for your money.. But truth be told.., NOT all women are like this.. (get this through your head!)..

Note: The same way a man would be insulted if a woman thinks he is just interested in her because of sex.., even though he isn't.., is the same way you would insult a woman if you think she is interested in you because of your money.., even though she's not..

A bit of economics:

Visible & Latent Utility & Disutility..

Examples:

Visible Disutility: The person is ugly.., dresses badly.., is sloppy

Visible Utility: The person is attractive.., dresses well.., carries themselves well.., seems well-liked and popular

Latent Utility: The person is funny.., smart.., fun.., interesting.., nice.., caring.., compassionate.., thoughtful.., romantic.., supportive.., motivating.., sensitive.., gives great oral.., is loaded..

Latent Disutility: The person has low self-esteem.., is insecure.., egotistical.., abusive.., jealous.., selfish.., inconsiderate.., lazy.., mucho drama & emotional baggage..

Now.., I want you to imagine the market for dating like the NYSE (New York Stock Exchange)

Every person is a security.., publicly traded.., there is only 1 of them in the whole market.., but there are many other securities on the market just like them..

You don't know anything about the security.., aside from how it looks like and the "price"..

However.., be skeptical about "price" in the dating market.. Who sets the price? In classical economics.., the market.. In dating economics.., the person! The assumption is that "Price = Value".., and so.., you can expect.., at any individual's discretion.., for them to simply price themselves more than they are actually worth..

An other thing price reveals.., "self esteem & confidence".., Think about IPOs (Initial Public Offerings).. new to the market.., these securities sharply discount themselves when they're first traded.., simply because they don't know what they're worth! Given enough time and trading history.., the market will allow the individual to get a good idea of how much they are worth.. If a person is "shy".., chances are you're looking at an IPO or something with low self esteem.. As investors in the dating market take their chances with this security.., you can expect their confidence to rise.., and you can expect their price to rise..

Price signals information about that security.., information about confidence and self esteem.., information about how desperate it is to sell.., experience and market history.., fundamentals (looks.., personality.., and financial position).. More importantly.., the way a security is priced may signal information to investors.. (what is the net of latent utility vs. latent disutility?).. However.., this is an ambitious assumption.., since most people don't like to project or show their negatives (much less admit them to themselves).., and will only highlight and advertise their positives.. You can expect the same with pricing..

Strategic pricing in the dating market:

Unfortunately.., as it turns out.., a security that's priced high is unattractive for men.. Simply because there are so many other ones on the market that are fairly priced and of similar or greater value.. However.., what's interesting is that a security that's priced high is "sometimes" attractive for women who are unable to distinguish price and value and believe the two are the same.. (example: cocky guys.., jerks.., arrogant self-absorbed guys).. While some women easily mistake egotism and insecurity as confidence.., other women rightly so find it unattractive.., "because the security is pricing itself much higher than its actual value"..

The optimal pricing strategy might be counter-intuitive:

Think about this.., you see a security with a value of 80.., you have your own security to invest with a value of 75.., you price your security at 70 because you're modest.., and the other security is priced at 65! How attractive of an offer is that? I know what you're thinking.., "why would the other security price itself at 65?" Modesty? IPO? Not confident yet? It's not that their value is lower.., you're given that the value is 80.. It's an attractive offer.. The only negative is that the investor runs the downside risk of losing the security if it will grow to be more confident and wants a higher price for itself..

Preselection: You know the boy-band effect? Lots of girls chasing after a guy automatically makes that guy seem more attractive? Well.., imagine a security that everyone is buying.. Heard behavior will just cause more people to want to buy it or at least be curious about it.. The increased demand will cause the security to ask for a higher price.., which will in turn put a limit on how much the market is willing to offer it as investors will no longer see it as attractively priced relative to its value.. (note: this is why people who are full of themselves are unattractive.., they're simply pricing themselves too high relative to their actual value)

So.., now that you're well-versed in the economics of dating.., let's talk about opening game..

You see her on the bus.., traffic light.., bookstore.., coffee shop.., guy's locker room.. etc..

You know that once you start talking.., once you pass that hook-point.., you're solid.., there's no way she can't see who the real you is.., and you're confident once she gets to know who you really are.., she won't be able to help but to fall in love with you..

So my question is.., logically.., what's the problem? I hope you're not sitting there doubting yourself.., I hope you're not there thinking.., "she wouldn't be interested in someone like me.., she wouldn't like me.., I don't know if she would like me.., am I her type? She looks like she's really outgoing.., I don't really like clubs.., I say I do.., but I don't.., they bore me to death.. blah blah blah".. If you are.., you need to work on that..

But if that's not what's going through your mind.., then you're more likely faced with.., "what do I say? wait.., maybe I'll..., no that's too cheesy.., but maybe.., nah.., I don't know.., that's not really me.., oh.., I got it! yes! that's perfect.., but now isn't the right time.., I'll wait for that right moment.., crap! There goes that moment.., damn it! Ugh! What do I say now? Common think! Just do it! No! Crap.., she left! Ugh.., whatever.."

This reminds me of two things..

1. The Greek joke with the "grillo" (the thing you use to change a tire)

- Guy gets a flat tire.., in the middle of nowhere.., it's 4am and raining heavily.., deep into the darkness of the night he can see a faint light.. He starts walking towards it and realizes it's a house.., So he starts to think to himself.., "It's 4am.., so I'll knock on his door and tell him I'm sorry to bother him so late but my car broke down.., no.., that would be rude.., I have to at least introduce myself to him.., yes.., but what if he doesn't trust me? Then I'll have to pay him something for bothering him so late.., but what if he's cranky and doesn't want to help me? What if he just shuts the door in my face and won't even let me use his phone? Does he have no heart? I can't believe he could be such a jerk!".. He finally reaches to the door and knocks.., the owner wakes up and opens the door.., just as he does.., the guy punches him in the face screaming.., "fcuk you and your grillo!"

2. People who make up excuses for themselves when it comes to losing weight..

- I'm not fat
- I'm still beautiful
- It's not easy
- After a certain age.., it doesn't matter
- I'm already married.., what's the point?
- It's because I'm married!
- It's YOUR fault.., you cause me so much stress!

The point is.., don't make excuses for yourself.., and don't fall into a mental conflict with yourself.. Just stop "thinking" and start "doing"..

I remember asking my first girlfriend out.., I remember thinking.. "oh man.., what if she doesn't like me.., she probably doesn't like me.., what the hell.., who gives a sh*t anyway.., it's not like I'm going to blow up if she doesn't like me".. I had never talked to her before! EVER!

Me: Hey..
Her: Hey..
Me: Umm.., are you doing anything this weekend?
Her: I'm actually busy this weekend.. why?
Me: I just wanted to go somewhere together.., but since you're b..
Her: OMG! (hugs)
Her: I think I have some time on Saturday!

Afterwards I thought to myself.., "wtf? This didn't just happen.. no way this just happened.. NO WAY! I refuse to believe it.. I'm going to wake up in 10 minutes.., ugh.., WHAT! AHHH! OMG! I can't believe it! NO WAY! NO WAY! NO WAY! wtf?!?!?!?!?".., Yeah.., it was pretty unreal.. my how things change.., now it's so routine.. like a well-developed process that's observed as a function of time..

The advice that saved me was my uncle's.. "There's no such thing as a bad approach.., there's only a good approach and a better approach.., the only bad approach is no approach".. That's a very masculine view on things.., (translation: don't make excuses for your problems.., just find solutions for your problems)

If you are aware of your own value.., your human portfolio.., your commodity on the dating market.., your visible utility.., and your latent utility.. Then true confidence isn't an issue.., there's no reason you should feel the need or urge to "act" or "be" confident.., you should find a grand sense of comfort in being natural and just being yourself..

Also.., a sign of insecurity and low self esteem is withholding interest! Let me repeat that.., People who are insecure or have low self esteem will try not to let their interest in the other person show.. It's a distancing technique.., like in writing.., when you see someone talking in the 3rd person or using abstract or vague language without capturing anything of substantial emotional depth.., it's because they don't want to reveal too much.., they're afraid to.., afraid of being judged.., afraid of others knowing what they know or think.. It's the same with people.. As you get more confident.., you'll find yourself naturally taking pleasure in giving genuine compliments to others and gladly telegraphing interest to those you are interested in.. Because for you.., it's like you're doing them a favor of letting them know you like them.., you're not phased by their lack of showing you interest because you "already know they're interested".., and understand they are just feeling a little "insecure and intimidated" by you.. You also understand the female politician.., how hard it is emotionally for a woman to express her interest in you before you express your interest in her.., how hard it is for a woman to accept and allow for things to escalate even though she's interested in you..

Don't be frustrated with the workings of her ego or self-image.., don't try and analyze the overall picture and consider what is "fair" or "just" or "equal".. This isn't a courtroom.., it's dating.. Just be understanding and compassionate.. Respect her need to feel chased.., desired.., wanted.., sexy.., even play along and make her feel like she has sexual power over you.., don't be offended.., just play along.. It's important for her self esteem.., and it makes her feel good about herself.. Yes.., you have dignity and respect for yourself too.., and I know it doesn't seem fair.., but honestly.., is it really as important to you as a guy as it is to her as a woman? No.. So be considerate to her needs as a woman in your whole approach..

Road-side bombs:

- I have to point this out in case it's news to you.., but no matter how great her personality is.., or how smart she is.., nearly all women think that every man who wants to talk to her.., wants to get into her pants.., There could be a supermodel standing next to her.., and she'll still think that you want to get into her pants because you're talking to her.. This is the ego at work.., at times she's unaware of the fact that she's not the only woman on earth.., definitely not the most attractive (don't tell her that!) and this is the most difficult idea for women to wrap their heads around.., when you go up to her to talk to her.., it's not because you want to get into her pants! (However.., don't waste your time explaining all that.., just take her internal thoughts and perceptions about you as a given.., and proceed with caution)

The approach:

There's no thinking involved.., if you're thinking.., you're losing! Remember that! (ugh.. stop thinking!)

Everything is natural.., no.., don't tell yourself.., "be natural".., because then you're not being natural..

Natural is me walking outside my house.., unshaved.., my hair is a mess.., wearing the same clothes I wore the previous day.., meeting up with my friend Tony who is decked out and all dressed up like he's going to a wedding.. and just start talking to people.. Who do you think has more success? Take a wild guess..

Fine fine.., do you think I have more success when I dress up.., (style my hair.., dress up.., etc).., or dress down (messy hair.., look like I just came out of bed)? I actually do a lot better when I'm not trying.. A LOT better.. BY FAR!

Remember.. "pricing".. Whoever is looking can tell that I obviously can look a lot better if I get dressed up.., they feel like they're the only one who can see that.., so they jump on the opportunity.., (and who says women like a challenge? women like it easy too).. PLUS.., I don't come off like I'm on the prowl.., it doesn't look like I came out to hook up with random people like the other 99% of guys there.. Gel never touches my hair.. it's always soft and easy to run your fingers through.., easy to play with.., it offers an excuse for her to keep touching me.. "because my hair is so soft" supposedly..

Hands down.., the more you try.., the worse you do.. The less you try.., the better you do.. This is not about you pretending to not be interested or acting aloof.., you're still being yourself.., but part of being yourself and being natural.., is not doing things you wouldn't normally do.., things you're not comfortable with.., so don't try hard.. there's no reason to..

Opening: (Your sticking point)

Honestly.., what I'm about to tell you.., is the fundamental theorem of opening.. "it doesn't fcukn' matter what you say.., just say something!"

I can isolate the problem down to male perfectionism.., like when your girlfriend tells you.., "i'm bored.., pick something fun to do".., your male mind is trying to think of a place and activity that will give you both the optimal amount of fun.., you won't settle for anything less.., and you wouldn't allow yourself to give your girlfriend anything less than the best.., so you keep thinking and thinking.., and you can't find anything.., so you end up telling her.., "I don't know"

Get over this now.., When you see whoever it is.., on the bus.., in a class.., on the street.., etc.. "it doesn't fcukn' matter what you say.., just say something!"

All you're doing by opening.., is handing her a rope.., no pressure.., soft sell.., but you're doing her the favor of giving her the opportunity to interact with you.., or else she would just sit there the whole time and pretend to not notice you as she tries to get your attention and hope you feel motivated enough by the way she looks.., so that you can go over and talk to her.. (it's actually very hard being in her position.., if you were a woman.., you'd probably kill yourself and hope to come back as a man)

That's all there is to opening! "It doesn't fcukn' matter what you say.., just say something!".., anything.., hand her that rope.., and she'll gladly grab hold of it.., she'll thank you for doing so.., eventually..

Just make sure your rope can afford you close to 5 minutes of conversation.., or enough time to talk about something interesting.. That way you can keep the medium in which the interaction takes place alive.., "the conversation!"

Don't: (Pick for straws)

You: What kind of dog is that?
Her: A Terrier
You: He's so cute.., can I pet him?
Her: Sure.., he's friendly.., he doesn't bite.., I hope he doesn't bite..
You: How old is he?
Her: He's 5 now
You: Is this as big as he gets?
Her: Yeah.., they stay that size..
You: What kind of dog food do you feed him?

(The point is.., you're picking for straws.., you have to realize quickly.. at around "can I pet him?" that you need to take the conversation someplace else if you expect to keep it going.., her dog isn't that interesting.., and it's going to get boring.., then awkward.., then you have no excuse to keep talking.., she may still want to keep talking but won't want to be the one to push.., so unless you keep the conversation going and interesting.., game over)

Examples of successful openers:

[url]http://www.loveforum.net/personal-development-forum/21193-opening-my-situation.html[/url]

Also..

Situation: Girl sits down with a biology book and diet pepsi in her hand and is clearly a college student..

Guy: Is that a diet pepsi?
Girl: (obnoxious) Yeah?
Guy: I wouldn't be drinking that right before an exam..
Girl: Why not?
Guy: It has phenylalanine..
Girl: What's that do?
Guy: Wow.., I hope you're not pre-med or pre-pharmacy.. lol
Girl: No.., I'm going into nursing
Guy: That's even worse! You have to know pharmacology like the back of your ass!
Girl: Haha! Well.., what the hell does it do.., now you got me all worried..

Situation: I'm sitting down and drinking a regular pepsi..

Girl: Is that rice pudding?
Me: What?
Girl: What are you having?
Me: Oh! It's a pepsi..
Girl: Really? I've never seen that before!
Me: Yeah.., it's like Coke.., but better..
Girl: No way.., Coke is better..
Me: Try it..
Girl: (sips) Wow! This is way better!
Me: So.., what cave are you from?
Girl: Huh?
Me: You have to be living in a cave to not know about pepsi..
Girl: Haha! I'm originally from Riverhead.., but I moved to the city a year ago..

So you see.., as hard as it is to believe.., with all this analysis and theory behind it.., as you get into the habit of opening.., you'll start to realize that "It doesn't fcukn' matter what you say.., just say something!"

GrkScorp, wtf man?!

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Only-virgins [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

GrkScorp, wtf man?!

---

I don't know if I'm just nervous about my interview or date later on today..

I mean.., it is Deloitte and Sullivan & Cromwell..

And then again.., this girl doesn't seem like a nut job.., she's extremely intelligent.., a future lawyer.., goes to NYU right now.., I've met her mother and really got along well with her.., could totally see her as a mother-in-law.. I don't know.., we just really clicked.., and that hasn't happened with anyone for a really long time.., like EVER!

Yeah.., fcuk the job.., it's because of the date..

Oh well OV.., I guess you're probably wondering what she looks like.., knock yourself out.., I should probably get some sleep and try to take the interviews a little seriously tomorrow..

[url]http://s306.photobucket.com/albums/nn250/SummaFelix/Jess/[/url]

P.S. : In case it's not obvious.., she's the blonde that shows up in every picture..

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by GrkScorp [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

If a woman says "NO".., she means "maybe".., if she says "MAYBE".., she means "yes".., and if she says "yes".., then she feels like a bad woman.., (i.e. "cheap".., "desperate".., "easy".., "slutty".., or as if she is projecting the message to everyone else including you that she likes you more than you like her).

---

lol not sure about that theory grk, when i say NO i mean it....and god help the person who doesn't believe me.......

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by GrkScorp [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

It all boils down to diplomacy.., as my father told me when I was starting out as a Real Estate agent.., "diplomacy is the art of telling someone to go to hell.., in such a way that they can't wait for the trip!"

---

another way of putting it that i like

Diplomacy is the art of saying 'nice doggy' until you can find a rock.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by GrkScorp [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Girls talking about a guy she's interested in to her friends:

- He's really really cute
- He takes care of himself and knows how to dress well
- His parents are loaded! Their net asset value is close to $30 million.., I asked the bank for financial statements..
- Yeah.., plus he's an attorney.., making 6 figures a year!
- Has his own car and place.., plus a vacation home in the Hamptons!
- And he's ok.., I guess he's nice and all

(Ugh! You're so lucky!)

---

omg.....that is such a sterotypical view on women....maybe it's a big deal for some but jaysus my ex came after me because of my social standing and what i had to offer him financially....this is what i truly believe anyway....men are just as bad sometimes

I told my ex 10 things i liked about him....real personal....nothing matierialistic/superficial...well except for saying he was hot and knows what 'he's doing'.......i remember asking my ex to name things he liked about me....because i had my suspicions....he couldn't actually come up with 1 thing even though i said take as much time as you need...email me if you want....he forgot (fine) i reminded him....he said....'i like the way you are independant and want to become financially secure'!.....nothing else.....

i realise that pressure can be factor for not coming up with something originally....thats why i didn't care originally....but i do think he gave the answer he was thinking in the end

and he used to go on about designer clothes and labels....i hate them btw....i'm no sheep....he was seriously materialistic



oh and good luck with the job and the date :)

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by ecojeanne [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

omg.....that is such a sterotypical view on women....maybe it's a big deal for some but jaysus my ex came after me because of my social standing and what i had to offer him financially....this is what i truly believe anyway....men are just as bad sometimes

I told my ex 10 things i liked about him....real personal....nothing matierialistic/superficial...well except for saying he was hot and knows what 'he's doing'.......i remember asking my ex to name things he liked about me....because i had my suspicions....he couldn't actually come up with 1 thing even though i said take as much time as you need...email me if you want....he forgot (fine) i reminded him....he said....'i like the way you are independant and want to become financially secure'!.....nothing else.....

i realise that pressure can be factor for not coming up with something originally....thats why i didn't care originally....but i do think he gave the answer he was thinking in the end

and he used to go on about designer clothes and labels....i hate them btw....i'm no sheep....he was seriously materialistic

---

It happens.., but remember.. Not all women are like you.. How many exceptions can there seriously be? When you ask people if they consider themselves above average.., what does everyone say? Yeah.., I think I'm slightly above average.. Well.. if everyone is above average.., then what the hell is the average? What's the definition of average?

I'm not doubting your honesty to yourself.., but I do doubt most people's honesty to themselves.., when they look at this.., the truth bothers them.., and they feel the need to write back something in an effort to reject the reality.. The reality of things brings them a most unpleasant sensation and feeling.. (guilt, shame & vulnerability)

You.., are financially independent.., maybe your family is as well.., which gave you the luxury of perhaps never looking at men like your means of survival.. But do understand.., that not just "some".., but "a lot" of women don't truly share the same tale..

Also.., your ex boyfriend sounds a lot like a girlfriend.. Though I must say.., I'm happy I was right about you from the very beginning ecojeanne.., If there were more women like you out there.., it would be a lot better world to live in.. :D

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by ecojeanne [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

oh and good luck with the job and the date :)

---

Interviews where ok.. I really do feel a bit odd for not feeling more nervous about them.., I almost feel like I should.., it's the rest of my career and life we're talking about.. But oh well.., we'll see what happens..

As for the date.. yeah.., 19.., on the same level.., I'm very excited.. I look at her.., talk to her.., and just think to myself.., "marriage".. She's definitely the kind of girl you want to get married to and just call your wife.., the mother of your children.., your life partner.. The connection is definitely there.., like we're the same two people.., on the same wavelength.., but in different bodies.., waiting to finally meet..

Obviously.., yes.., I know.. I have to control myself.., I can't just say something like that.., because the tragedy is.., which is why I hate some guys.., that she may think I'm just saying it to get into her pants..

AHH! I could just see it now.., lawyer couple.. By the time she's out.., I'll be a couple of years away from starting up my own office.., our own office.., :love:

Yeah ok.., /end vent

I need to snap out of it like right now.. :P

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by ecojeanne [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

lol not sure about that theory grk, when i say NO i mean it....and god help the person who doesn't believe me.......

---

I mean during the chase..

A girl needs to put up some resistance so that she doesn't feel cheap or easy.., since she's a little girl.., that's all that's drilled into her little head.., "don't be cheap.., don't be easy.., you're worth more than that! go YOU girl! you're not a slut are you? don't be a whore like those other girls! have some class and respect for yourself!.., blah blah blah"

For example.. if you told me "no".., would you really mean it? ;)

Grkscorp, you make some great quality posts :)
Well, ive decided after class im going to just go up to her and introduce myself, ask her how she likes the class and let it go from there.
Considering either asking for her number/email as I dont like not asking for either, id rather get a straight "No thanks" then leave it open.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by GrkScorp [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

[url]http://s306.photobucket.com/albums/nn250/SummaFelix/Jess/[/url]

---

I would go for her brunette friend if I was you, while it's still early.

Alright, so this is what i figure im going to do:

*walk up to her after class*
"Hey, im ____"
"So, how are you enjoying the class so far?"
etc etc for about 2-3min

Then, close with saying.
"We should hang out sometime. Any chance I can get your number?"

What do you all think.

Oh my god, GrkScorp , the bit about the yes/no/maybe thing is dead on!!

Grk, she's smokin' hot. That bikini shot was, like....rawr! Don't let the bet contenders see that.

Does she have any idea that you are posting her pics for all the world to see? I'd be a little freaked out if someone posted my pics all over the net without my knowledge.

EDIT: Come to think of it, she might be the type that would like that. She definitely doesn't seem shy in front of the camera.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by starbuck [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Grk, she's smokin' hot. That bikini shot was, like....rawr! Don't let the bet contenders see that.

---

Hey hey! No wanking off to my future wife! :mad:

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by starbuck [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Does she have any idea that you are posting her pics for all the world to see? I'd be a little freaked out if someone posted my pics all over the net without my knowledge.

---

Good point.., I should probably kill the link..

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by starbuck [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

EDIT: Come to think of it, she might be the type that would like that. She definitely doesn't seem shy in front of the camera.

---

No.., don't be fooled.. All this social butterfly does is socialize.., that's it.., nothing more.. She's in front of books or her computer all day.., studying or working.. For someone so social.., she's very shy.., but hides it really well.., and she's very nervous and quite inexperienced which is fine.., I don't really mind it..

Conservative.., Greek Orthodox.., Republican.., with an overly protective father.. It might be a difficult transition for me to make.., but it'll definitely be interesting.. Regardless what she wants to do.., I do want to wait at least 4-6 months before we start doing anything.. Only because she's inexperienced.., I don't know if she can catch on to the fact that I'm not there because of the sex.., so that's enough time for her to talk to her friends and family and get the positive feedback of.. "ok.., he's not that kind of guy".., that she wouldn't likely be able to derive for herself.. Not because she's dumb or anything.., but because she lacks the experience..

I'm actually very excited though.. Sure.., she doesn't have that liberal uninhibited sexuality inside her (please.., spare me the "you never know").. she doesn't.. But I'm not only fine with that.., I like her more for it.. I can look at her.., her eyes.., when she laughs.., and just think to myself.., "I can totally see myself married with her.., spending the rest of my life with her.., she would make such a great mother and wife.., such a great friend and partner".. I just melt when I'm next to her.. And I really don't give a sh*t about the loss of control over my own self.., I feel comfortable enough with someone as honest and genuine as her to completely let myself go and get lost inside our own little world..

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by GrkScorp [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

There's a wealth of literature on this.., but I suspect you're looking in the wrong places..

- Marketing (Management & Strategy)
- Consumer Behavior
- Organizational Behavior
- Behavioral Economics & Finance
- Advertising & Sales (Persuasion & Promotion)

"How do we market a product or service to complete strangers?"

"How do we grab hold of their interest?"

"How do we engage their curiosity and make them want to know more?"

"How do we get them even more interested and maintain that interest?"

"How do we set ourselves apart from the rest of the market?" (Blue Ocean Strategy)

"How do we motivate a buyer and translate that into a sale?"
__________________________________________________ ______________________

Now.., is the dating market really any different?

Think of yourself as a commodity.. a portfolio of assets.., human capital.., and qualities.. That's who you are.., and there's a marketplace you can sell yourself in exchange for an other commodity.., There is a certain demand for your portfolio of assets based on evolutionary biology.., social engineering and cultural practices..

Despite what you may have been lead to believe by an American media that uses "sex" to sell.. This tends to determine the survival rate of offspring..

Erotic & Physical Capital: 20%
Emotional & Intellectual Capital: 30%
Financial & Social Capital: 50%

Now.., fortunately for women.., we live in a hypersexualized culture where from a very young age.., men are conditioned to think of women as sex objects.. This becomes their life-long meta-model for how they respond to very attractive women.. Which means.., that men will ignore a woman's Financial & Social Capital value.., place less emphasis on her Emotional & Intellectual Capital value.., and focus on her Erotic & Physical Capital value.. Making the revealed preferences of men look something like:

Erotic & Physical Capital: 90%
Emotional & Intellectual Capital: 10%
Financial & Social Capital: Who cares?

Eventually.., after a guy gives in to all the advertising and marketing.., somewhere around his 4th or 6th girl he realizes that they're all pretty much the same.., whether she's screaming or silent.., moving or still.., hot or normal.., it doesn't make a difference for his d*ck.., it still feels the same.. So he starts to wonder.., "sex is not all it's cut out to be.., so what am I REALLY looking for?".., that's when the light dawns on his male mind.., "children.., family.., marriage".. His preferences for commodities on the dating market change..

Erotic & Physical Capital: 50% (Hey.., it's a HUGE decrease)
Emotional & Intellectual Capital: 40%
Financial & Social Capital: 10% (Mostly.., he doesn't want to marry someone everyone else has slept with)

So now that you have an idea about the preferences.., you can start to think about a couple of things..

Guys talking about a girl he's interested in to his friends:

- She's so thin and in shape
- She dresses really sexy
- She's got the whole T & A package
- Supermodel legs and blow-job lips
- These amazing eyes and her soft voice
- Ugh.., and she's normal! No drama!

(Dude.., that's awesome.., sounds like a keeper)

Girls talking about a guy she's interested in to her friends:

- He's really really cute
- He takes care of himself and knows how to dress well
- His parents are loaded! Their net asset value is close to $30 million.., I asked the bank for financial statements..
- Yeah.., plus he's an attorney.., making 6 figures a year!
- Has his own car and place.., plus a vacation home in the Hamptons!
- And he's ok.., I guess he's nice and all

(Ugh! You're so lucky!)

---

Thanks Bro.
You open a window for me.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Jastela [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Grkscorp, you make some great quality posts :)

---

He's the MAN :cool:

Yeah he helped me alot in the past. He understands where alot of AFCs are comming from. He knows how the game better than anyone here.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Jastela [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Alright, so this is what i figure im going to do:

*walk up to her after class*
"Hey, im ____"
"So, how are you enjoying the class so far?"
etc etc for about 2-3min

Then, close with saying.
"We should hang out sometime. Any chance I can get your number?"

What do you all think.

---

Anyone????

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Jastela [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Anyone????

---

Great!

I like it.., simple.., to the point.., shows you're not afraid to be direct and obvious.., but at the same time.., not too forward.. really great job..

Depending on how well the conversation goes and what vibes you're picking up from her..

Ehh.., so-so: "We should hang out sometime!"

Good: "Why don't we hang out sometime?"

Both of them work well.., don't drive yourself crazy over them.. :D

But DO change the "ANY CHANCE I COULD get your number?".. to a "why don't you give me your number and.., I'll call you to go hang out sometime".., or "why don't you give me your number so I can have it on my phone.., and maybe if I'm doing something this weekend I'll call to let you know"

Good luck! Relax.., looks like you have some good instincts that you're not even aware of yet.. Stop doubting yourself and start having a little more confidence with the way you think.., it's working.. ;)

Best,

GrkScorp

**** I didnt get a chance to ask her after class today >.>
Gotta do it sometime this week for sure, i cant let this one go.
Id rather know that she isnt attracted to me, then not knowing at all.

do it tomorrow and film it.

any update?