An older man.

Hey.

Before i get started, i am 13 years old. At my martial arts school there is a guy who is an assitant teacher and he is 18 years old. I will call him A.

Ok so, i know it is common for girls my age to have crushes on older guys, and i think that is what has happened. But he seems to like me (atleast as a friend) and he (what i think) flirts with me alot when he isnt teaching. Like he will kick at me and if i flirt with him, like poke him or bump into him or play name games, he usually does it back. And i have been catching a lot of eye contact with him. I could just be getting it randomly but who knows.

Anyway though, i recently got his phone number because i took a picture with my phone and he wanted me to send it to him. I sent him some txts and he has answered every one. I am trying not to seem too into him and so im keeping my txts short and to the point.

Would it be weird if i tried to get him to like me? I would really like to have him as my boyfriend, but i dont know if he would want to be with a young girl like me. I am in 7th grade going into 8th and he is graduating next week. I have alot of feelings for him and i dont want them to go to waste since i usually dont fall too hard for guys unless they are "perfect".

What do you think i should do?

You're 13... and he's 18... he'd have to wait 5 years before you could legally be his girlfriend.

You can't expect him to break the law for you and date you now... and I doubt he would wait 5 years for you.

So, this crush won't become anything more than a crush... try to see him less... and hang out with your friends more.

I always heard that he could be my boyfriend, we just couldnt do anything sexual past kissing or else it would be illegal.

Right?

Should i just suck it up and wait 5 years and see if my like for him is still there?

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Originally Posted by shorty10 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I always heard that he could be my boyfriend, we just couldnt do anything sexual past kissing or else it would be illegal.

Right?

Should i just suck it up and wait 5 years and see if my like for him is still there?

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An 18 year old will need a sexual relationship -- something you, as a 13 year old cannot provide.

You need to suck it up and let him go... before you get your hopes up too high and get crushed when you see him with a girl his own age.

Seriously... hang out with your friends and less with him. If possible.. try to find a boy closer to your age who has some of the traits this 18 year old does...

There are 2 other usernames under her current IP, 1 at least is a male.

Just sayin'.

Well i love martial arts and there is no other good school around here so i cant leave, and that is the only time that i spend with him unless we go to tournaments. Sometimes when we go we go to movies and the last one i sat next to him and he didnt seem to mind at all.

Do you think all 18 year olds need a sexual relationship?

And that is my brother, who also does martial arts. He is the one who led me to this site, frasbee.

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Originally Posted by shorty10 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Do you think all 18 year olds need a sexual relationship?

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18 year old guys? Yes

Alright. Well thanks.

So any tips to help me get over him? Like i said i cant avoid spending time with him.

Don't communicate outside of class.

Don't text him anymore, and try not to reply if he texts you. Also stop "flirting" with him.

Going into a relationship with this guy will put him in jail for statutory rape and believe me, 18 YR OLD DUDES will do anything to get in a girl's pants.

And even if you did pursue a relationship with this guy, it is still unhealthy. You are not yet EMOTIONALLY mature yet and at this age, you are still going thru a lot of confusing states like puberty and hormones will just add to the mental confusion.

No.

Just.. no.

ew this is so wrong. you don't fall for guys unless they're perfect?

You're 13. I don't think you have the slightest idea of what falling is. If he is even considering you that means there is something seriously wrong with him and you are jailbait!!!

I dont think he is into me. He just kicks at me if i kick at him or whatever.

I stopped texting him and he doesnt seem to treat me any different. I dont want to make him get in trouble...

And no i didnt mean i dont fall for anyone that isn't perfect. What i meant was i think he is perfect and i dont think i could fall for anyone else while knowing i like him.

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Originally Posted by shorty10 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I dont think he is into me. He just kicks at me if i kick at him or whatever.

I stopped texting him and he doesnt seem to treat me any different. I dont want to make him get in trouble...

And no i didnt mean i dont fall for anyone that isn't perfect. What i meant was i think he is perfect and i dont think i could fall for anyone else while knowing i like him.

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Well you are young, it's natural to have a crush on someone older. I'm glad that he isn't in hot pursuit of you, that would be really wrong of him.

By all means be friends with him. You never know what could happen in the distant future, but don't hang your hat on it.

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Originally Posted by Rollerderby [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Well you are young, it's natural to have a crush on someone older. I'm glad that he isn't in hot pursuit of you, that would be really wrong of him.

By all means be friends with him. You never know what could happen in the distant future, but don't hang your hat on it.

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I definitely agree with what you said.

@TS:

You're still 13 and you still have all the time in the world to fall in love and you still have a lot to learn about love because love isn't just about the happy endings that go with it, but you make it through to get the happy ending that you want and believe me, at 13, it's still not yet possible for you to know what you want in a relationship. Take time and hang out with your friends and don't be embarassed about having a crush on someone older than you because it is completely normal.

I would be very happy if we grew up and he was still the one i wanted. Before i moved i had liked a boy too and he was 3 years older then i was, and i never stopped liking him until i met this boy. Maybe the same thing will happen i dont know.

So it is ok to still be friends with him and still have hopes? I know they might get crushed but still, it would be nice to think i have a chance.