is my penis small?

My girlfriend i've been dating for 2 1/2 year were having sex with me yesterday, She was on top riding me.. I started to pound really fast making long strokes and she started laughing out loud saying "STOP STOP STOP IT TICKLES" i go "whats wrong" she said "I don't know it's tickling something inside and i couldn't stop laughing"... However there's position i put her in and she say it hurts..EXAMPLE "If i hold her in the air and bang her, or from behind..

WOMAN WHATS YOUR OPINION? IS THE LAUGHING BECAUSE MY PENIS IS SMALL? OR THAT HAPPENS DURING SEX?

Yes, your penis is tiny

Where's that penis chart when you need it?

Hang it up so guys can just look at it, get immediate answers without all the torture...

You are hung like an elephant. Man enough for three.

Anything else you need to hear, General X-Rated?

Did everyone's compliments on your mighty organ cause you to ejaculate into your trousers?

I can just picture this (er, NOT that I want to....)...the OP is kneeling in front of his computer reading all of our replies. He's bald, 28, lives alone with his mother and his cat Freddy in an apartment in the Bronx. No air conditioning. His been in and out of employment since 1978 and the girl he to whom he is referring is the girl he had a crush on in 1977 in his junior year of high school...Mary Jane Rottencrotch who had thick glasses. Internet porn has now become so passe for him that he passes his time asking total strangers if his dick is too big for Mary Jane's apparition which haunts him every night.

Okay. He's not 28 anymore...mathematically, he's 49. Otherwise, the story is consistent.

And you would deny him this simple pleasure if that is all that is left to him?

Shame on you Cam.

There must be plenty of synonyms for 'huge' and 'John Thomas' we haven't thought of yet. ;)

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Originally Posted by IndiReloaded [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

And you would deny him this simple pleasure if that is all that is left to him?

Shame on you Cam.

There must be plenty of synonyms for 'huge' and 'John Thomas' we haven't thought of yet. ;)

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Am I really bad?? :upset:

Love,

Cameron

I've refined my picture of Mary Jane, his love interest. She wore those polyester knee length dresses (brown, of course) and an off-white blouse with a winged collar, and a matching brown vest. The shoes? Low heels with the little brass buckle. The glasses (thick, big frames with the stems on the side that had that dip downward to the lower part of the glass frame (remember those?). And, she wore her grandmother's White Shoulders perfume and I'd guess a sun coral lipstick color. Beehive hairdo.

Oh my. Well, if that doesn't scare him off, then I'll post the Python song. Only if he posts again, tho.

i think that everyone's replies to this thread has made him shame...


everyone single one of you members should be ashamed of yourself...

where is my damn "booooooooooooo" button again... vash, you'd better bring this up to LA.

raverboy

I really don't want to picture a penis in my head right now.

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Originally Posted by Raze [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I really don't want to picture a penis in my head right now.

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A penis in your head?????:astonish:

Carl.

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Originally Posted by Raze [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I really don't want to picture a penis in my head right now.

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i don't to picture you with a penis in your head either.. that would mean that you're giving head.

raverboy

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Originally Posted by Illusional [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

i don't to picture you with a penis in your head either.. that would mean that you're giving head.

raverboy

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No, that would mean I'm giving head a thought, which is almost as bad.

literally a dick in your head would be a dick in your mouth. the last time that i checked, your mouth on was part of your head.. unless you're weird.

raverboy

Ugh. okay okay okay okay okay

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Originally Posted by generalx [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

WHATS YOUR OPINION? IS THE LAUGHING BECAUSE MY PENIS IS SMALL? OR THAT HAPPENS DURING SEX?

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Your penis ain't to small untill you have to use one of those to find it:

[Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

^^ HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA! Yup. That would suck.

poor generalx. as entertaining as this has been you guys are meeeeean. so dear generalx here's my 2 cents. i don't know anything about sex but my very experienced sister once told me that it's not about size, it's about "the motion of the ocean ;-)" SO, if whatever you are doing is either hurting her or making her laugh, then work on your moves, instead of worrying about size.

^^ People on here are mean.

What's wrong with laughing during sex? Or about it?

I guess they don't make porn movies that involve affectionate tickle fights leading to lovemaking, do they?

Too serious, lol. I think I will post the clip afterall:

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YxXfwodWChg&NR=1"]YouTube - The Penis Song (from The Sweetest Thing)[/ame]

LMAO i haven't seen that in years

Good song :) And, just so you know...we always tell women that their breasts are perfect, the new dress is very nice (mental note: and will look better when its hanging over the bedpost), and that the lasagna they made for dinner is really delicious...

...oh, and that we'd love to grow old with them (theoretically, of course, and assuming that they don't become post-menopausal nut-jobs and develop cottage cheese thighs).

Holly hell... men don't really require that much lying to boost their egoes... do they?

Eventually they do figure out they're around average in size and learn to cope... just as everyone else learns to adapt to any other shortcomings... .... right?

Or am I giving guys too much credit here?

LOL Cam, you are flattering me. That song is stupid, but funny in a juvie sort of way. I almost didn't post it. Except it does make the point.

I was going to post the Python Penis Song, but then I realized that those who would find it funny already know it, and those who don't probably wouldn't. Or something convoluted like that. :lol:

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Originally Posted by CAM [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

and that the lasagna they made for dinner is really delicious...

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You mean its not?? I always thought my husband loved my lasagna... ;) I make it with pesto mixed with creme cheese, and I use my arrabiata sauce not a generic bottle sauce...

I'm all for flattering the missus, but I am also all for being honest to her.

Sometimes she experiments in the kitchen and sometimes it turns out.. well.. deadly... I won't lie to her if whatever she tried to cook tastes bad, but I still will compliment her for trying and encourage her to keep on experimenting.

Hence, I love to cook myself and screw up occasionally. Who doesn't? I prefer she tells me if what I cooked sucks, instead of being nice about it. One has to be able to take criticism.

My signature dish for years has been a Thai Mango chicken curry. I think I was feeling generous and posted the recipe here a while back.

Tho, when I was in Oz, I saw that you can buy *bottles* of this sauce now. LOL.

We should revive that recipe thread (Mishs?). I could use some new ideas.

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Originally Posted by IndiReloaded [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

My signature dish for years has been a Thai Mango chicken curry. I think I was feeling generous and posted the recipe here a while back.

Tho, when I was in Oz, I saw that you can buy *bottles* of this sauce now. LOL.

We should revive that recipe thread (Mishs?). I could use some new ideas.

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Well, I'd eat your chicken curry any day. I make lots of curry dishes, too. Very good stuff and very good for you, too.

PS. And when one is dealing with a lady such as yourself, there would not be any need to be deceitful---you are a class act.

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Originally Posted by IndiReloaded [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

My signature dish for years has been a Thai Mango chicken curry. I think I was feeling generous and posted the recipe here a while back.

Tho, when I was in Oz, I saw that you can buy *bottles* of this sauce now. LOL.

We should revive that recipe thread (Mishs?). I could use some new ideas.

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If only you knew the recipe for Nigerian Curry Goat over Rice... ever since I left Dallas, I have been in dire need of that recipe... the sauce, the spices, the juicy texture of the meat, all mixed with the delicate rice was absolute perfection. I'd damn near pay real money for the recipe... :P

Do you got a hairy dick?
if you do, pubes can pop in and cause it to tickle. if that's the case, TRIM YOUR ****ING PUBES!!

if a certain position hurts and taking long strokes, then obviously your dick can't be that small.

hell, I know a girl who told me about some sad sack of shit, that had a dick so small, that the second guy she slept with ended up busting her cherry.

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Originally Posted by Aeradalia [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

If only you knew the recipe for Nigerian Curry Goat over Rice... ever since I left Dallas, I have been in dire need of that recipe... the sauce, the spices, the juicy texture of the meat, all mixed with the delicate rice was absolute perfection. I'd damn near pay real money for the recipe... :P

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I think that we should all get together for a chicken curry and we can have a Penis Insecurity Summit to discuss the OP's problem. If necessary, "Thelovedoctor" can give a lesson on pube trimming. Cameron Diaz (yes, I caught the irony there Indi...it would be Cameron and Cameron) and I can discuss the "felicity of duplicity" in relationships and sing a song :)

HAHA pube trimming

Cam, you attribute more intelligence to me than I deserve. I wasn't digging at you with that clip, really. Tho, it IS funny now that you mention it.

It just happened to be on the same page as the Python Penis Song and I thought it suited LF better.

Thanks for the compliment. It was delightful to read. I'm reassured after posting that awful clip that my ladyhood wasn't irreparably damaged. :)

Here is the thread with the mango curry recipe:

[url]http://www.loveforum.net/off-topic-discussion/23086-what-you-enjoyed-today-3.html#post355291[/url]

We also have a recipe thread:

[url]http://www.loveforum.net/off-topic-discussion/25324-what-your-best-meal-recipe-2.html#post389744[/url]

I hope that never happens to me :)

i don't know how this went from small dicks to recipes, but i'm all for recipe discussion! probably should start a new thread somewhere else for it though... :-)

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Originally Posted by lostinconfusion [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

i don't know how this went from small dicks to recipes, but i'm all for recipe discussion! probably should start a new thread somewhere else for it though... :-)

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Just click on my second link & revive the thread.

Only the size of the balls