My girlfriend always flirts and is super jealous.

We have been going out for 14 months and everything is going great, she is a little jealous and there is a trust issue with me going out, everytime i go out without her i get the vibe that she really doesn't trust me and she texts me a lot.

When we go out somewhere like last night, she kinda ignores me and she flirts with everyone. If i was single i would get the sign that she was saying 'Hey i'm single and ready!' with the dirty dancing she does to other guys but when a guy makes a move on her she does turn them down.

I think its starting to break my trust, like if i wasn't there what would happen?

I told her this morning and she said i'm just flirtatious but i'm yours.

When she does something i don't like i would tell her then i say what if i done what you just did, she said she would freak out.

I really don't know what to do but its been building up for a while now and sometimes i'm close to ending it as if there is no trust there is no point.

What should i do...

hmmmm double standards.....

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Originally Posted by Bumble_bee [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

hmmmm double standards.....

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hehe


RG, it sounds like you two just need to communicate a little better. Have you had a serious heart to heart about this or just the little texts and teases? If you haven't had a sit down, sounds like it's a good time before someone blows up.

We talked about it this morning but she didn't really take it serious, she just said thats who i'am and that she means nothing of it.

I think she is doing to just to get a reaction out of you.
Do the same thing at the same time and I bet she would become sick to her stomach.
I'm almost willing to bet she would stop doing that shit.
If she doesn't... then consider it a double standard.

RG, I think CC could be right, it sounds like maybe she's trying to get a reaction out of you, I don't know.

The flirting doesn't bother me, I've been with the biggest flirts on the face of the earth. The grinding/dirty dancing wouldn't go over with me at all. I can be possessive when I'm smitten.

In the end, if she doesn't respect what does or doesn't bother you, that speaks volumes. I know you know that.

I don't really mind the flirting as much as the grinding/dirty dancing, when she does that i'm like eh hello, am i here?! i would not dare do it front of someone i was going out with.

She is such a nice person when its me and her...when the drink comes out she is someone i cannot stand, she knows it annoys me becuase i kind of go into a silent mood and she will suck up to me when we go home.

Just after watching the way she gets on when i'm there makes me wonder what does she do when i'm not there, also when i go out she always says silly comments that hint that she doesnt trust me so i'm worried she thinks i'm going to cheat so she will too.

Wow. What a little asshole. The next time she starts grinding, go over and buy some other girl a drink.

Should i bring it up soon or wait till she does it again then tell her, what should i say?

Lets say she doesn't take it seriously and doesn't stop what should i do, end it?

i feel like i'm loosing trust really bad, i have never had trust issues with anyone before which is making me kinda loose interest in her.

We will be going out for 15 months next week and we were together for 4 months before we actually went out so i don't really want this to happen as apart from this i'm really happy but i shouldn't have to put up with this.

u should do what CC said and do the same thing to other girls next time u go out, see how she feels about it! ;)

You need to talk to her properly about it now, dont wait til she does it again- you need to show her how serious you are about it and how much it bothers you. If she still does it after you have made it clear how you feel then is this girl really someone you want to be with?

Even if she is doing it for the reaction, theres no point in you doing the same just to get back at her...thats just makes you as bad as her.
I hate game playing.

This is really a clear example of insecurity. I used to be just like this girl: didn't want my guy looking around, but definitely took all the male attention I could, so long as it didn't cross the "cheating" line. You need to tell her that either she starts working on her confidence issues herself, or she finds someone new she can use for a boost.
I wish guys in my past had had the self-preservation to do that, it would have gotten me in line a lot faster. I used to think (in my deranged little head) that this sort of behaviour was okay, too, but it's absolutely inexcusable. If she needs that sort of attention to make her feel good, she has a lot of "inside" work to do, and you cannot do it for her.

When you show her the same courtesy she shows you, make sure you tell her it's just who you are. And snuggle up to her like she does you. Get the upper hand in the relationship. This girl is playing you like a middle school-er. How old is she?

I spoke to her yesterday and when i brought up the subject she didnt really take it seriously, but then i blew up and got my point across, i was so close to breaking up becuase at the start she didnt really see the problem but when she thought about it she got quite emotional and said she couldnt believe she could be so stupid, she said she only noticed it was so wrong when i pictured herself in my shoes and me doing it.

She said it'll never happen again, we talked about it for around 2 hours and everything is sorted now...or until next time but if it happens again i'm out as she knows my limits now and if she crosses them she is doing it on purpose.

well im glad at least she seems to acknowledge what she does is wrong.
I hope it works out and she doesnt do it again.

There's not an old saying 'words speak louder than actions' for a reason RG. Let's see how she is over the next few weeks...I know she sees the error in her ways, hopefully she can correct them.

I'd break it off with her, simply for that reason. She is blatantly disrespecting you! She doesn't like you! If she did, she'd not do that! If she's doing it to get a reaction out of you, she's an immature little brat that doesn't know the key to healthy relationships: COMMUNICATION!

If she doesn't like what you do, she should communicate with you about these things... NOT go off and rub her privates on some guy in a club! ABsolutely not relationship material, my friend. Break it off ASAP, if you ask me. Her actions speak loud enough. Don't give her another chance, because in the long run, she's going to do something even worse, and it's going to hurt you a LOT more than what she did already.

Trust me. When women see guys folding and not sticking up for themselves, these women will continue to do even more things to manipulate in order to get their way. This is disgusting.

Find a good girl. This current girl sounds like an immature brat-child. Sorry man, but it had to be said. Why? It's the truth, according to what you said in your first post!