Girl I have feelings for getting taken advantage of...
Okay, this might be a little long, but I do appreciate any insight of anyone who can take the time to read it.
There is a girl. There is me. I am hopeless. I've been in love with her for more than four years. For the first two years we were best friends, basically she had to decide on myself or another guy to date. She chose him since she thought I wasn't interested. Hes was a real jerk, and whenever he treated her poorly she turned to me for support, and ended up cheating on him with me. BUT she decided she loved him (and he would always crawl back to her full of remorse and love filled words/vows) and called it off between us. Oddly enough we stayed really good friends and I learned to ignore my feelings for her. They stayed together for a total of four and a half years. They broke up a month ago. We aren't quite the "BFF's" we used to be, we kind of drifted apart, but are still pretty close friends. On the day of the break-up she came over and talked to me about it, she cried violently on my shoulder. I've never seen her cry half as hard as that.
Of course I am interested by this development, I will admit to being hopeful that something could happen between us. I understand what she must be feeling, so I told myself purposefully that I would not push it and take advantage of her vulnerability, remain friends and be there for her. Maybe something would happen in the future. I'm fine with this.
--Problem-- This girl and myself have a mutual friend who has always expressed interest in her, and actually was quite pushy about a trying to have a relationship with her when she had a boyfriend. (he has an attraction for taken women). To be honest I'm not sure why he and I are still friends. I don't know maybe not for long.
So back to about a month ago - She is sad, crying like I've never seen, was worried she might hurt herself. (which of course worried me) She then disappears for three days, no one can get a hold of her, not answering phone calls, texts, etc. This mutual friend and I are discussing it. More of a me going "Oh dude have you heard from her i'm getting worried, she was talking about hurting herself" his response angered me it was "whatever dude don't worry *rolls eyes* that bitch just said that because she wanted attention". Of course grade A dirt bag statement. She comes back from this, apologizes for making me worry. I am quite relieved.
Oddly enough we all start hanging out again. (this was always our old group that hung out). I try even harder than normal to make her laugh, smile, to help her feel better about the break up. Oddly enough she doesn't have any more serious talks with me like she made me promise to be there for when she needed them. This mutual friend starts acting strange, and I catch on that they are hanging out alone, and he is spending the night over there a lot as well. I still haven't said anything about it. I think he honestly thinks I have no idea.
About 3 or 4 nights ago I became upset, I don't know, a panic attack about the situation. They think I have a problem/jealousy about their relationship. I was given this info from another party. The mutual friend came over "just to hang out" without my invitation. I ignored my previous "being upset" and pretended nothing was wrong. The girl sent me a text, about how if I was hoping to take advantage of her after the breakup, if that was my intention then maybe we shouldn't be friends. In a nutshell that is what it said.
Honestly I'm just happy with her in my life. For some reason she has it in her head that I am like that, but is letting another guy take advantage of her.
Basically I would like some advice on how to make it evident that is not my intent, and how to help with this whole, other guy problem. And yes I have entertained the high possibility that she is just using him for a rebound. >.> Its just driving me insane
