Kind of embarrassing.

So my boyfriend and I have been dating for about 3 months and the sex is not so good. It wasn't that great in the beginning but I wrote it off as normal. But the problem is that it hasn't gotten any better, at least for me. Although there are a few issues with the sex, the biggest one for me is his noises. He seriously sounds like a girl when we have sex and it turns me off! I have no idea who to talk to about this or how to approach him on it. He is constantly wanting to have sex (of course) but the more he pushes, the more I think about cheap female porn stars faking it (because that's what it sounds like)

I hope I didn't offend anyone here, although it is quite humorous, it is far from sexy. Please HELP!!!:P

Oh, my God. How do you get through it without cracking up? I wish I had some advice to offer, but all I can give you is sympathy.

I used to laugh on the inside, now i just get frustrated because I lose my potential orgasm. I mean c'mon! I thought guys sounded like they were crossing a frozen lake of thin ice when they had sex, not like janna jameson!

It's awkward, but you need to talk to him about this. And if he can't control himself and his girlie noises, then you may have to just play some loud music whenever you have sex.

Hahahahahahaha!

Oh man.

How have you not laughed him out of the bedroom yet?

Um, lesbian fantasy perhaps? Imagine you're having same-room sex with another couple and the other girl is getting off?

That still wouldn't be enough to get me not to laugh. The whole time I'd just be thinking, "My boyfriend sounds like a girl. My boyfriend sounds like a girl."

And something tells me he wouldn't take it well if you were brutally honest with him.

It's really sad but I wear the pant in the relationship, so this just seals the deal in the wrong way. I DONT WANT TO WEAR THE EFFIN PANTS!

I have tried pretending lesbian sex, but the whole penis thing is just to realistic to pretend its made of plastic.

Last night I actually plugged my ears, but then I heard him in my head. This sucks. Thanks for the loud music suggestion!

I find myself having sexual fantasies about other men and them making their manly sounds. I miss it. I miss the grunting. I can't believe I miss the grunting.

Well if you really like the guy I think you need to talk to him about it and ask if he can shut the **** up. Maybe he just thinks that is what he is supposed to sound like for some reason?

But sounds to me like this isn't the only part of the relationship he has some feminine qualities if you feel your always wearing the pants so I say dump the guy but don't actually tell him why...no need to bruise his confidence.

This is f'cking hilarious !

Pretty soon he will be handing you a strap-on and asking you to do him in the ass !! :D

Yikes !!!

Run like the wind.

LOL! I hope he doesn't ask me to do him anally. I can be kinky, but not THAT kinky! Another issue we have sexually is that he has NEVER masturbated. According to him. He was brought up in a super religious household so I can sort of believe him, but relying on me to take care of his "needs" is effing rediculous considering his feminine screams of ecstasy.

Omg. I am dating a girl. It all makes sense now. The not masturbating (like a lot of women) the screaming, the 'cuddling' all the time. :(

Makes me want to date a rediculously manly man.

Given what you say I don't think you should talk to him I think you should dump him. You don't even seem to like him that much. (this is based on this thread and your other one). He doesn't sound like the one for you.

Doesn't he even care (or notice) that you're not having an orgasm?

I wouldn't be able to keep a straight face.

Gawd, I couldn't be doing with a guy who moaned like a girl...it would be enough for me to dump him.

I was once with a guy like that. It was a huge turn-off. Anyway, the early stages of a relationship should be some of the sexiest. If you and your boyfriend don't have that sexual chemistry or if you are turned off by his noises, then you should think about whether you want to be with him regardless of it. I just don't think it's gonna go over really well if you approach him with "Baby, you sound like a woman in bed and it turns me off."

GRAB HIS BALLS GIVE THEM A HARD SQUEEZE...AT LEAST HE WILL HAVE A REASON TO SOUND LIKE A GIRL! Seriously you did not say anything about the rest of your relationship. If you think there is something worth trying to save approach him on it gently and supportively. Say I don't know if you have ever noticed but when we have sex you sound remarkably like a girl. What is going on? See how he handles it.

....he watched some weird foreign porn and he thinks that that's the way to do it.
i would've been biting my lip HARD.

Maybe he is really a woman and had a sex change - anythings possible these days.

Oh my God I just realized I do that to my GF : (

I tend to breathe heavier, talk dirty, as I get close to finishing I say some profanity and usually there is sort of a grunt/growl I guess and then I exhale, relax and am ready for a nap....but no girl noises.