the old and gray

today i was in the public library studying for finals and of course there are other people there studying. well there was an older gentleman i'd say in his 50's or so. i noticed him because he was reading a newspaper on the table next to me.

and then this high school girl comes and sits on the 3rd table next to us and i noticed that his eyes gaze over at her and i think nothing of it because everyone looks when a girl walks by. however this guy then gets up, and wanders around for a while then moves behind the girl making as though he is looking for a book or something. i can see him out the corner of my eye, staring at her, which then kinda grossed me out. later he then sits by her being that he was right behind her, and the table that she is sitting on would be the closest table. again his eyes stare her up and down and then i didn't even wanna bother with them anymore.


now tell me what you think of this. yes it is quite normal for guys to stare at girls but when there is an age difference of about 40 or so years, how do you feel?

raverboy

I don't know about you, but when I'm 50, I'm sure that a 20 year old will STILL look attractive to me. And I intend to look. I'll NEVER stop looking. I'll just be more cautious about getting caught as time goes on or if I'm in a serious relationship.

Rod Steele

i personally think its sick..if its a highschool girl and hes in his 50s, i would have probly had thought about swinging on the guy..but then again i may have some anger problems.

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Originally Posted by Clifton

i personally think its sick..if its a highschool girl and hes in his 50s, i would have probly had thought about swinging on the guy..but then again i may have some anger problems.

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Why would you swing at him? He didn't do anything. He saw something he liked, so he kept looking. No harm, no foul.

its a guy in his 50s staring down some girl who as at oldest, 18. so staring at a little girl, and most likely making her extremely uncomfortable, in an inviornment where she is trying to do work, is no harm? hmmm...

sounds like he was kinda stalking her though. i can see him checking her out but sometimes guys check out girls and it looks like they're gonna rape them. it's scary. i've had guys check me out and sometimes it's okay, even flattering. but when an old man is staring at me non-stop i do tend to get a little freaked out.

once it happened to me that when i finished reading the book on bus stop, there was some old man (>60 for sure) looking between my legs when i had minidress. So i dont affraid their loose appetit when goes over 50. My father for his age is also very "about life" :-)

So Clif,

If you were at a library and some 20 year old was staring down a girl who was trying to ignore him would you swing at HIM?

oh come on leave clifton alone. he's just being protective of a girl and that's okay. i'm sure he wouldn't deck him as he said but he's paying attention. ain't nothing wrong with that.

I agree with alexi, actually. Raver didn't mention anything about the girl being uncomfortable or even noticing the guy looking. Raver noticed, but the dude doesn't have to care if Raver notices, as long as he's not making the girl uncomfortable, he can look and there's not harm. He can look at a young girl in a magazine or a porn movie just the same if he's 50 or if he's 20.

Now, assuming he is making it obvious and/or coming on to the girl. That's a whole other thread...one about age difference and whether it matters and, of course, there are many different ways of viewing it, with attention to each individual scenario.

Freds

It's absolutely gross. I hate it. And I have the worst attitude towards men like that.

If I see a gross guy or man staring at me in a suspicious way I just give him the dirtiest bitchiest scariest look. Usually it helps. I gave one of my signature looks to some nasty bastard on the subways once and I believe he called me "bitch from hell" or something like that.

well the girl didn't notice, only i did. personally i can't look at girls that have just come out of high school. there is about a 6 year different and they look so young that i don't even wanna bother looking. like i'm crossing a boundary that i'm not supposed to cross. when i'm 50+ i believe that i'll turn my head if a girl crosses my path but nothing more. i don't want to stare and drool her at making like she's the first girl that i've ever laid eyes on.

raverboy

I wouldn't even care if the guy started trying to flirt with her. He's just trying to get some. And some girls are into the WAY older men. An old friend of mine (lost touch) was into that and ended up marrying a guy twenty two years older than her. How is he going to find out if she's one of them without even trying?

Some may consider it dirty, but if he's a single guy, what the hell is there to stop him from trying to get a piece of younger ass? Of course assuming not under 18, but whatever. Besides, I lear at a good looking women no matter WHAT her age. Or what my age. Whether she be fresh outta high school or a great looking fifty year old, an attractive woman is just that. It isn't hurting anyone.

Rod Steele

That's what I preach too...as long as it's not hurting anyone, but consider also that making someone unnecessarily uncomfortable is also a form of hurting. A couple of girls here have pretty much said it makes them uncomfortable, so where do you draw the line. Again, if the girl never noticed, why should we care that he took a gander at her. If he was staring her down and really making her squirm in her seat, that's when I say it's not cool. But like Alexi says...it is true that some girls are into old farts (or maybe that's just a porn fantasy/illusion)..so nothing wrong with asking, again, if the girl isn't being made feel uncomfortable.

Freds

The other night i went out to eat with kenny and he told me that there was an old man starring at me across the way, & i told him no hes not but the next tim ei looked he was looking my way. I wasnt uncomfortable by it. I guess even when you are 70 u are gonna find a young woman or man attractive to you. & when you get to be that age you can really give two shits about alot of stuff, it seems as you get older the less you care about what people say or think. I honestly think that if you have made it to the age of eighty or more you have the right to do whatever you want, i mean as long as you are not direspecting, but lets face it the deerly is the edlerly

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Originally Posted by Killerbabe

It's absolutely gross. I hate it. And I have the worst attitude towards men like that.

If I see a gross guy or man staring at me in a suspicious way I just give him the dirtiest bitchiest scariest look. Usually it helps. I gave one of my signature looks to some nasty bastard on the subways once and I believe he called me "bitch from hell" or something like that.

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lol. i utilize that look too. the "don't talk to me or i'll bite your ****ing head off" look!

i use it at the mall when those perfume people try to approach me, or when a dirty old man is staring at me.

i call it flamenco face.

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Originally Posted by misombra

lol. i utilize that look too. the "don't talk to me or i'll bite your ****ing head off" look!

i use it at the mall when those perfume people try to approach me, or when a dirty old man is staring at me.

i call it flamenco face.

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my kind of girl. question misombra, if your with your man, and some girl is staring him down and giggling at him, what do you do?

well for the most part, imagine this, a 70 year old guy is checking out your sister who wasn't at age 18 yet.. or worst, your daughter. now how would you feel? quite different right?? i'm not hating on this guy because i feel at no matter what age guys are, we will look because of the constant desire to spread our seeds over mother earth. now i feel that there is a point a lot of guys past when it's not just a quick stare, but they turn their heads and start to drool. this is usually when the girl feels uncomfortable.

oh and the girl at the library, i doubt she was over the age of 18.

another thing to think about.. i seen this on tv.. ask yourself, why do women dress attractive? oh it was on phone booth. if they are either married or not, why do they wear make up and nice clothes?? it's not for themselves, but it's to attract eyes. if you look at things from this point of view, they want attention. they are out there looking for mr right, and when mr wrong stares at them the wrong way, it's called sexual harrassment. so for all of the ladies.. think about this before you head out to the club showing a little more ass then you'd like to show mr 70 year old who is also at the club. hahaha

raverboy

if i'm with my guy and women are checking him out (which they always do because he is gorgeous) i just laugh. and he tells me that they have nothing on me and i'm happy.

girls that dress scantily are asking to be looked at like a big piece of meat. that's why if i have daughters they're going to have to wear burka's until their 30.

aww, WRONG answer, :( your suppost to go call her a bitch and punch her in the face damnit

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Originally Posted by Illusional

another thing to think about.. i seen this on tv.. ask yourself, why do women dress attractive? oh it was on phone booth. if they are either married or not, why do they wear make up and nice clothes?? it's not for themselves, but it's to attract eyes. if you look at things from this point of view, they want attention. they are out there looking for mr right, and when mr wrong stares at them the wrong way, it's called sexual harrassment. so for all of the ladies.. think about this before you head out to the club showing a little more ass then you'd like to show mr 70 year old who is also at the club. hahaha

raverboy

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We often times forget to consider..simply becauser we're used to dividing ourselves into male and female, no matter what the situation, that some issues are not gender related. I think that men want attention just as inherently as women do. It's just a characteristic of humans..not just girls. Of course, society makes a man who wants attention a pansy while a woman dressing pretty and getting all fixed up is just normal.

Yeah, of course we want attention, and, yeah, of course you'd rather have the attention of the person who's desirable to you as opposed to the old, fat, bald man...unless you're into that...but you cannot please or displease everyone.

I think most people take their chances...look as attractive as they choose to look and hope to attract or have better chances at the desirables.

Freds

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I think most people take their chances...look as attractive as they choose to look and hope to attract or have better chances at the desirables.

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Exactly.

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well for the most part, imagine this, a 70 year old guy is checking out your sister who wasn't at age 18 yet.. or worst, your daughter. now how would you feel? quite different right??

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The point is that noone was with her. If I was with my girl or had and was with a duaghter and guys are blatantly checking her out, then it doesn't matter WHAT the age, it's just rude. But if she's alone, then I don't know about. We don't think about, and it DOES happen behind our backs (people asking out our significant others and whatnot), but we can't stop that from happening unless we're with them ALL the time and/or keep them locked up.

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if you look at things from this point of view, they want attention. they are out there looking for mr right, and when mr wrong stares at them the wrong way, it's called sexual harrassment.

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But something like the original post (an old guy staring at a good looking young girl) isn't gonna do shit in court. Otherwise, girls would have free reign to play a "sexual harrassmant" card on anyone that looks at them that they don't find attractive or don't want looking at them.

Bottom line, I still find nothing wrong with him checking out a good-looking girl.

Rod Steele

I disagree, why cannot i dress nice to feel good and nice? Do you realy thinks, that women are trying to be satisfied with them self just to attract men? Sure it is often true, but i am dressing nice and caring for my self even at home alone, or going to work!

he's not talking about dressing nice, he's talking about dressing "naughty". Girls with their G-strings hiked up above the waist of their hip-hugging jeans, mid-drift tops showing lots of cleavage, etc.

i feel that people dress up because they just want to look their best. i mean everytime i go out, i dress up just because i don't like to appear all hobos. sure if we aren't doing anything spectacular then i don't get all spiffy.

also about attention, i think that most people love attention. eyes looking upon you usually means that someone takes notice of you and in a world full of 100 billion trillion people, it's nice to stand out once in a while.

raverboy