Why do i bother with her ?

went out drinking the other day, my female friend was out and asked me to see her so I did, we went to different clubs later on, she kept texting me asking where I was and asking me to go to the club she was in. eventually I did and she greeted me with a long hug, I spent the rest of the night with her, walked her to a taxi, she got in and left the door open so I got in as well.

She asked are we going to yours or mine so we went to hers, shared her single bed and cuddled abit, next morning she wasnt so cuddley but I had my arm over her at times and she didnt move away or cringe or anything. Its the first time i've been out to town when she was out and i've never went to hers or anything like that before. The texting in the following days was short and weird at first but is starting to go back to normal, i asked her to the pics not as clearly as i could have, her response was ''aw i didn't think you were asking me to go haha'' I replied ''yea i was'' she then said ''ahaha oh sorry'' Why do i bother with her ?

What? I need clarity, this makes no sense to me.

Yea clarity would be good, a good case of 'you got played stop crying and get over it' you know something along those lines or perhaps if your feeling more feminine and don't want to rub your big butch internet balls all over me, a dissection of the the night out and following events with the reply to my obvious date request and a conclusion on what as female you believe could be in this girls head would be pretty good. Since posting this i ignored her she texted me again i havent/wont reply, if that adds anything.

Edit: Ask a female forum. Your male.

You ask for help...and then go act like a dick. Well played Maestro..

I'm not meaning to be a dick, so i'm sorry. These things don't normally bother me, but it obviously is, hell i dont even know what i was expecting [osting this thread but yea, i apologise.

I read the thread over and over but did not quite understand what the question was, and especially what "I asked her to the pics" meant. There is a language barrier that female nor male can understand which needed clarity as IncognitoSir asked, or rewording. Of course, you'll get little advice out of anyone if you bite their heads off.

pics = cinema. Yes i know, again i apologise for my earlier post, it was out of order and disrespectful when people are giving me advice. I am sorry. Anything else that isn't clear in my post please just ask, thank you.

Edit: Had i bothered to think before post my question would have been somthing along the lines of : Dont get her, should i just give up ?

No problem. I get the gist of what your thinking...but it's a little unclear. there's no clear question cos you just want advice on the situation? It sounds like she just wanted the company. Best thing to do is just talk to her about it. If you like her...tell her. If not then just leave it as they are. Maybe it means your going somewhere...maybe just got closer friends. Ask. All you can do really.

After the night out i was 99% certain she liked me and was just shy, (she says she shy and kinda is), but her response to my text's asking her to the cinema has thrown me off completely, a complete reverse on how i was feeling when i sent the messages.

Oh the cinema! Sorry, that was what I wasnt getting. Okay so correct me if Im wrong: You end up meeting her at a club, spend the whole time together then you go back to her place. No sex, just cuddling? Then the next few days texting is a little awkward but starts getting back to where you guys are mostly comfortable again with each other and you end up asking her to the movies but she says "haha sorry"?

So she said no to your date offer?

Girls love to use alcohol as an excuse to be a whore. It sounds like she might have been having a great time drinking then invited you over for sex (when she can use alcohol as an excuse that she wasnt thinking clearly) with no intentions of actually having you as a boyfriend.

Also text messages can be very unclear!!! Try asking her out in person next time.
Its also possible she was apologizing due to not understanding you were asking her and she hasn't gave you her answer yet or didnt know to give an answer. You should ask again if you think she really likes you!

Basically yes, I wasn't particularly clear i was asking her to the cinema, i asked if she had plans and said i wanted to see something at the cinema and i would be able to go around 9, she said she didn't realise i wanted her to go with me, she just thought i was saying i wanted to see the film i was on about. Then she said sorry, but she didn't ask to go another day or anything like that.

The night out is correct, however she asked me to go see her and after i went somewhere else with other friends she kept asking me where i was and to come to the club she was at which i eventually did and things went from there.

Which is what has thrown me off, she was giving me signs she liked me then but the next few days she wasn't and even though i wasn't 100% clear on my intentions its not hard to see after the night out that i like her and so i don't understand why she was like that on the night out but the opposite now ?

It sounds like a big miss-communication. Her not going with you to one movie doesn't mean she doesn't like you. So you ask her on one date and she says no and now you want to give up? Unless she has been acting very very cold to you then I think that you haven't been trying all that hard to get her.

If anything i was acting cold to her, after the movie thing i started ignoring her most the night, eventually when i came to my senses i text her and we started talking about the night we where out together, short texts nothing major, today its like nothing ever happened, she's texting me pretty much the same as she normally does, nothing out the ordinary. So should i try again another time to ask her out ?

I think the whole situation was all in your head. It sounds like she didn't do anything wrong/ like she didn't realize she hurt your feelings at all, and because of your insecurity at the movies it ruined your chance for a great time. If shes still texting you like normal then it sounds like there's plenty of opportunity to ask her to something else. Maybe wait for a fun casual event like OysterFest or whatever goes on in your town ;P

Yea i had work from 7pm till 6am then i had a trip across the country to my boxing training all of 4hours, little sleep plus boxing and emotion didnt bode very well to say the least. The thing that bothered me so much was that on the night out when we went back to hers we were all cuddly and close then the next day less so, and since then neither has brought the what happened up, though we have talked about the night.

It's more like why does she bother with you? You chicken crapper....you had your chance to make a move on her and you didn't. So I can see why she got distance there....because she was taken back by the fact you didn't and she's thinking you don't find her attractive enough...you let her down man.

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Originally Posted by Balance11 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

since then neither has brought the what happened up, though we have talked about the night.

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I wouldn't think about it too much. You guys had fun and cuddled, shouldnt be something you lose sleep over. Next time you have the opportunity to be at her place or yours then take it one step further and see how she reacts. She has to like you if she invited you over..