Mixed Signals?

I really like my friends house mate, hes a very nice guy and completely opposite to the previous guys I was with (which didnt work out). I get the impression he likes me and twice we've slept in the same bed but did nothing but cuddle. Firstly do you have basic tips on how to know if a guy likes you, especially if hes bad with technology so you cant judge by texting or that? Secondly, we went out for his birthday and things were going great, thought something might happen but there was an awful lot of girls all over him and he ended up kissing someone else. Later he told us all about this girl he kissed-though he was saying it in a bad way-and was talking about some other hot girl he saw out. He always mentions that a girl is hot if she walks by. Does this mean he only sees me as a friend or is he trying to make me jealous? Also, advice on whether to make a move or not and how? I reckon he must know that I like him as I make an effort to hang out with him as well as my friends/his housemates. Appreciate the input, cant really go in to much more detail as it would all be small little details of different incidents. However,once my friend alluded to me and him being cute together and he did go red and laughed.

Judging from what you've written, I'd say he's not interested in you.

A classic female mistake is to not pursue the guy. He might be waiting for you to say something first. But I do know from experience that if I like a girl, I will NOT talk about how hot another female is in front of her, as this would obviously show her I am not interested, rather I am interested in this other girl.

Does he compliment you at all? I doubt he is trying to make you jealous.

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Firstly do you have basic tips on how to know if a guy likes you,

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Ask him.

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I reckon he must know that I like him as I make an effort to hang out with him as well as my friends/his housemates.

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Nope. That means nothing. It just means you like him as a friend.

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However,once my friend alluded to me and him being cute together and he did go red and laughed.

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That also means nothing to a man. So ask him on a date. Then you'll get your answer for sure.

He does compliment me, but its more when its just the two of us coz he knows we'd get some slaggin from the girls if we were outwardly flirty or whatever in front of them! He is 25 though so id imagine if he liked me he would be a bit straightforward about it, though he is extremely shy! Only significant thing would be that he just randomly hugs me and kissed me on the cheek the whole time? I'll see if he gives any indications of liking me as more than a friend,if so I may as well as him on a date. Otherwise you guys could be right about him not liking me! Cheers for the input.. :)

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Originally Posted by indielover [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I really like my friends house mate, hes a very nice guy and completely opposite to the previous guys I was with (which didnt work out). I get the impression he likes me and twice we've slept in the same bed but did nothing but cuddle. Firstly do you have basic tips on how to know if a guy likes you, especially if hes bad with technology so you cant judge by texting or that? Secondly, we went out for his birthday and things were going great, thought something might happen but there was an awful lot of girls all over him and he ended up kissing someone else. Later he told us all about this girl he kissed-though he was saying it in a bad way-and was talking about some other hot girl he saw out. He always mentions that a girl is hot if she walks by. Does this mean he only sees me as a friend or is he trying to make me jealous? Also, advice on whether to make a move or not and how? I reckon he must know that I like him as I make an effort to hang out with him as well as my friends/his housemates. Appreciate the input, cant really go in to much more detail as it would all be small little details of different incidents. However,once my friend alluded to me and him being cute together and he did go red and laughed.

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I don't think he is interested in you. You were in bed together twice and he didn't want to touch your private parts, or stick his in yours??? This should be telling you something already... Sorry...

Wow, what a bunch of damaged males post here sometimes it's amazing. So a guy can't just cuddle without wanting to copulate with a woman he LIKES, does not desire apparently, and that says he's not interested. Uh-huh.../facepalm.

And OP, on all your questions:
Ask him.
Ask him.
Ask him.

And be forward. It's not true that "guys don't care about that", like getting red over someone commenting on you two. It's not true that he's not interested just because he's not going for your pants immediately. Maybe he's just a nice guy and no thoughtless dickwad like some others. BUT, you'll only get to know from HIM, and noone else. Tell him you like him, maybe even initiate physical intimacy. Guys actually dig that. Above all, just be honest with him and don't hide your feelings. Maybe you'll get burned, but you'll get over it and at least you won't suffer uncertainty, which is unecessary. Best of luck.

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Originally Posted by miffy [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Wow, what a bunch of damaged males post here sometimes it's amazing. So a guy can't just cuddle without wanting to copulate with a woman he LIKES, does not desire apparently, and that says he's not interested. Uh-huh.../facepalm.

And OP, on all your questions:
Ask him.
Ask him.
Ask him.

And be forward. It's not true that "guys don't care about that", like getting red over someone commenting on you two. It's not true that he's not interested just because he's not going for your pants immediately. Maybe he's just a nice guy and no thoughtless dickwad like some others. BUT, you'll only get to know from HIM, and noone else. Tell him you like him, maybe even initiate physical intimacy. Guys actually dig that. Above all, just be honest with him and don't hide your feelings. Maybe you'll get burned, but you'll get over it and at least you won't suffer uncertainty, which is unecessary. Best of luck.

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Buhahahahahahahahahahahaha ;-) cool story, bro ;-)

Let me rephrase: I am now 38 years old. I would NEVER end up in a bed with a woman and just cuddle. I would cuddle after intimacy. I am sure gay men "like" the women they "go to bed together" with, and "cuddle", but I do not think the OP had exactly this in mind when she asked the question.

There are some women I "like" with whom I would cuddle, but never in the same bed. Does this make me damaged? Probably...

There is no way a heterosexual man, past the age of 13 and a half, ends up in bed with you twice and noting happens intimacy wise. Unless, of course, if he is gay or .... ... ... simply not that into you.

Then I pity you as man, sorry to say. There countless reasons why that might not happen. You're just too insecure to admit you could be with a woman and not "jump" her immediately like some animal, for some reason of insecurity about your manhood maybe, I don't know. Just don't extrapolate and assume that it's the same for every man or woman for that matter.

Obviously I post here to get an unbiased, honest and sometimes harsh opinion. I AM acknowledging the fact that he might just not be into me but realistically i dont think its that strange that he can lie in bed with me and not try it on. In fairness, if i rejected him how awkward would that be; "i guess i'll just leave your bed now".. not to mention our mutual friends who he lives with. And the dude also knows that my parents just split up which had me a bit emotionally all over the place, he went through the same thing and coming from a large family with lots of sisters im pretty sure its more a case of him having respect for women. I do appreciate your opinon though, but i dont agree that a guy CANT sleep in the same bed without keeping it in his pants. And for the record, he is most definitely not gay. :)

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Originally Posted by indielover [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

i dont agree that a guy CANT sleep in the same bed without keeping it in his pants. And for the record, he is most definitely not gay. :)

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Well, there's certainly no rule that he can't but obviously when you're sleeping with someone you've not had sex with, it causes confusion about feelings and intentions.

I'm thinking sleeping with someone before you actually know how they feel about you is not the best idea in the world.

Nobody expects you to feel great about having a crush on someone and not having it returned. It's disappointing I'm sure, just have to move on.

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Originally Posted by miffy [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Then I pity you as man, sorry to say. There countless reasons why that might not happen. You're just too insecure to admit you could be with a woman and not "jump" her immediately like some animal, for some reason of insecurity about your manhood maybe, I don't know. Just don't extrapolate and assume that it's the same for every man or woman for that matter.

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I agree you can be with a woman and not jump her immediately. This is perfectly normal behaviour, especially in the initial phases of the relationship.

What is less normal, I think, is when you end up in bed with someone twice and no intimacy happens. I'd agree if it had happened once, you could have argued he didn't want to jump her/"was respectful", etc.

However, if someone (a heterosexual man) finds himself in bed with you twice and he does not try to get intimate with you, there is something wrong. He is homosexual, he does not like you sexually, he is playing with your feelings and expectations, etc.

OP, did you get the feeling that he was expecting you to make a move on him? In my mind, this could explain the situation, but I'd still say you'd be better off with a man who makes things happen while the two of you are already in bed.

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Originally Posted by indielover [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Obviously I post here to get an unbiased, honest and sometimes harsh opinion. I AM acknowledging the fact that he might just not be into me but realistically i dont think its that strange that he can lie in bed with me and not try it on. In fairness, if i rejected him how awkward would that be; "i guess i'll just leave your bed now".. not to mention our mutual friends who he lives with. And the dude also knows that my parents just split up which had me a bit emotionally all over the place, he went through the same thing and coming from a large family with lots of sisters im pretty sure its more a case of him having respect for women. I do appreciate your opinon though, but i dont agree that a guy CANT sleep in the same bed without keeping it in his pants. And for the record, he is most definitely not gay. :)

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Thanks, the issue of emotional turmoil could explain a bit his behaviour, maybe he was trying to comfort you in a trying time... But I think to do it in bed with someone, where sexual tension escalates easily, was not very respectful, I feels wrong to me, like he tried to lead you on...

Bottom line for me, if I tried to comfort you knowing you are in a tough spot, I'd not do it in bed with you. If I ended up in bed with you, I'd get intimate with you.

From another vantage point, I would not be in bed with a person I don't like sexually. If I go to bed with a woman I like, and do not escalate intimacy, I'd feel like I am rejecting her, and she would feel that way as well, based on my experience in life so far.

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Originally Posted by indielover [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

However,once my friend alluded to me and him being cute together and he did go red and laughed.

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He cuddles with you and went red at mention of you being a couple?

I'm going against the general group here and say he likes you, but is afraid of you. Do you have a strong personality? Eat babies for breakfast before 11am?

I would say a guy who doesn't like you isn't going to cuddle with you in bed. He likes you but is not sure how to proceed. Ask him if he likes you. If he stammers and blushes, apologize and suggest you go on a date. Good luck. :-)

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Originally Posted by Sixpacj [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

From another vantage point, I would not be in bed with a person I don't like sexually. If I go to bed with a woman I like, and do not escalate intimacy, I'd feel like I am rejecting her, and she would feel that way as well, based on my experience in life so far.

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That's just your excuse for being a cad, Sixp.

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Originally Posted by IndiReloaded [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

That's just your excuse for being a cad, Sixp.

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I had to look up "cad" :-)

"a man who behaves dishonorably, esp. toward a woman: her adulterous cad of a husband."

Why do you feel the need to call me names if you disagree with me. Just say you disagree, or provide evidence/information showing I am wrong.

Your calling me things doesn't make you right or "righter".

The OP wanted a male's perspective. I gave her mine. There was nothing "dishonourable" about it or in it towards women. If there was, please indicate. That you should not play with people's feelings, expectations? Is there an area where it is easier to get hurt or mislead than intimate closeness in a situation of emotional vulnerability?

If the issue at hand were so simple and straightforward, why is the OP here asking for info from males? To get an opinion of a female who thinks she knows about men? And who knows little about male sexuality, or better still, what feelings men have or have not in intimate settings, simply because she is not a man?

She (the OP) does not have to heed it or agree with it, but it is the perspective of a 38 year old man with quite some experience, so she'd be well-advised to take it into account, at least partially.

What are you females so sore about? That some of us have an opinion?

Have I ever told you what you should feel or think for me to approve of you as a female?

Have I ever called you a name for expressing what a female feels in an intimate situation???

There is nothing "dishonourable" about your comments Six. It's just that you generalize and extrapolate from yourself, a fairly typical male view that not going for the nookie immediately makes you gay, a softie, or not interested. It doesn't exactly do your emotional horizon credit, if you want it spelled out for you. Which is another clichée about us males.

I happen to agree with Indi. He likes her, but is scared of acting or of her in some way or form. Him not going for intimacy immediately is on the one hand understandable if they are a bit young-ish, on the other hand also speaks for him, he seems to be a more sensitive and cautious type. One you could build trust with more easily then.

1. "There is nothing "dishonourable" about your comments Six."

Of course, there isn't. I know. That was a rhetorical question. It escapes me why some woman felt it was necessary to call me that, prolly cause she failed to see another way to disagree with me.

2. "It's just that you generalize and extrapolate from yourself, a fairly typical male view that not going for the nookie immediately makes you gay, a softie, or not interested."

Buahahahahahaha man you're killing me ;-) You accuse me of overgeneralisation only to engage in gross and sexist generalisation in the same breath. We all generalise. It is called sharing your experience and the resulting knowledge. Also, in my posts you will find words "some", "in general", etc., and I never write that "women are more ... than men" or vice versa.

The OP asked me for an opinion. Me as a male. I gave her one. If you don't agree with mine, fine, present yours, but please spare me all that man-hating BS.

I am going to let you in on a secret - the sexuality of heterosexual men is different form that of homosexual men or females. Different. Mind you, I didn't write "superior" or "inferior".

Do not ever believe when a female tells you what a man should feel in a situation of intimacy, ever. I presented my view as a straight man, one who is rather direct and of a certain age. Other men have different opinions. Hear them out, but you need not judge.

Also, I never said you should go for the kill "immediately". In bed twice is not immediately.

3. "It doesn't exactly do your emotional horizon credit, if you want it spelled out for you."

How old are you? I am 38. I bet I have more of a horizon than you. Have experienced a lot, saw a lot of things happen, have done, seen and been told a lot things you would not believe.. Let me repeat: how old are you?

4. "Which is another clichée about us males."

And another piece of man-hating propaganda. Who is the sexist around here? Can't you string one sentence together without some form of male-bashing? Would you say the same if it were about females? What about Jewish people, or Africans, or homosexual people? Would you repeat cliches about them? Would you???

I frigging dare you ;-)

I sense a lot of shame in you and unresolved issue with your father maybe. Well, this is beside the point anyways and I, like all of us here, have my own issues, as well.

5. "I happen to agree with Indi. He likes her, but is scared of acting or of her in some way or form. Him not going for intimacy immediately is on the one hand understandable if they are a bit young-ish, on the other hand also speaks for him, he seems to be a more sensitive and cautious type. One you could build trust with more easily then."

Finally some sensible information without the need for man-hatred. I don't agree with it but if that is your view, fair enough.

Where do u get the sense of man-hatred? I'm simply annoyed by you implying that just because YOU can't imagine not being intimate when lying in bed twice with a girl, NO man could. THAT is where you are fulfilling a clichée about men in general, one I do not share and it's an image of manhood I reject. I am 27, heterosexual, and have been in several longterm and sexually very active relationships. Not that it matters at all. For that matter, age has nothing whatsoever to do with the level of depth you are capable of. I admit I made the comment out of annoyance and a bit ignorantly so, I'll apologize for that.

However, I am not male-bashing, I am simply stating that you shouldn't lead women to believe that just because you, as a healthy heterosexual man can't imagine intimacy without sex, no straight man could. Your view is one thing, generalizing is another. If you can't realize that I am telling you exactly why THAT is reinforcing a sexist view in itself and defending manhood as much more complex and deep than just that and accuse me of "man-bashing", you have no clue whatsoever.

I wouldnt neccessarily be INTIMIDATING i dont think but yes i would be quite an outgoing fairly self assured person who doesnt take any crap and he knows that-though clueless when it comes to relationships! I do feel like hes waiting for me to make a move but Ive had such bad experiences with this previously that im not sure what the best way to go about it is? Quite frankly, it scares the crap outta me having to lay my emotions out there and making myself vulnerable. We are going out tonight with our friends but I dont want it to be done when drink is involved coz I think that could make him doubt my sincerity?

As long as you're not roaringly drunk, I wouldn't worry too much about it. You're clearly very into him, and he's either waiting on you or intimidated a bit. Make a move, and see how he reacts. Caress his hair, kiss him, get into physical contact. His reaction should tell you volumes ;) Or you could just play it the very safe and cautious way, sit him down in an alcove or whatnot, and flat out tell him you like him. Be brutally honest and tell him you want to be with him. If he's too shy to make a move and kiss you or whatever, YOU do it. Take some initiative, as long as you're sure he wants you and you want him ^^

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Originally Posted by indielover [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I wouldnt neccessarily be INTIMIDATING i dont think but yes i would be quite an outgoing fairly self assured person who doesnt take any crap and he knows that-though clueless when it comes to relationships! I do feel like hes waiting for me to make a move but Ive had such bad experiences with this previously that im not sure what the best way to go about it is? Quite frankly, it scares the crap outta me having to lay my emotions out there and making myself vulnerable. We are going out tonight with our friends but I dont want it to be done when drink is involved coz I think that could make him doubt my sincerity?

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If being the one to pursue has turned out badly for you in the past then why would you do the same thing again and expect a different result. Perhaps it wasn't you doing the pursuing or initiating that caused the disaster but rather how you went about it that made is so?

Have you ever read the book "He's Just Not That Into You" or watched the movie? I think alot of it was bunk but certainly not all of it and if you haven't read it, it might give you a different view on things.

I tend to think that if a guy really is into you, then no matter how shy he is or how inappropriate he is trying his best NOT to be, he will still show you without doubt that he wants you. Even my own brother who was so painfully shy got the nerve to ask my best friend out and they later married.

Stop sleeping in the same bed with him. It's giving you angst and it's confusing you because you don't know what his intentions are. In fact, next time that opportunity presents itself and you tell him you're not going to sleep in the same bed with him, it may raise the opportunity to speak about things if he asks why.

Frankly, I know you'll do what your gut tells you to but I'd not be spilling my guts to him just yet. Show him how you feel in actions first and ask him out one-on-one. Gauge his response and go from there. One step at a time.

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Originally Posted by indielover [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Quite frankly, it scares the crap outta me having to lay my emotions out there and making myself vulnerable. We are going out tonight with our friends but I dont want it to be done when drink is involved coz I think that could make him doubt my sincerity?

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Just do what IndiReloaded suggested and ask him straight out if he likes you tonight, it's not making yourself vulnerable.

You seem to be struggling with reading his intentions, so just put it out there. If he says he sees you as a friend, then you won't waste the night watching him flirt with other girls wondering if he likes you. If he does, then you can focus on the two of you.

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Originally Posted by Sixpacj [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I had to look up "cad" :-)

What are you females so sore about? That some of us have an opinion?

Have I ever told you what you should feel or think for me to approve of you as a female?

Have I ever called you a name for expressing what a female feels in an intimate situation???

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Actually, I was just teasing you but left off the ;-) I don't know if you are really a cad or not. Sure, go ahead and have an opinion. I love opinions. I love the crunching sound they make when I gnaw on them. Grr.

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Originally Posted by indielover [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I really like my friends house mate, hes a very nice guy and completely opposite to the previous guys I was with (which didnt work out). I get the impression he likes me and twice we've slept in the same bed but did nothing but cuddle. Firstly do you have basic tips on how to know if a guy likes you, especially if hes bad with technology so you cant judge by texting or that? Secondly, we went out for his birthday and things were going great, thought something might happen but there was an awful lot of girls all over him and he ended up kissing someone else. Later he told us all about this girl he kissed-though he was saying it in a bad way-and was talking about some other hot girl he saw out. He always mentions that a girl is hot if she walks by. Does this mean he only sees me as a friend or is he trying to make me jealous? Also, advice on whether to make a move or not and how? I reckon he must know that I like him as I make an effort to hang out with him as well as my friends/his housemates. Appreciate the input, cant really go in to much more detail as it would all be small little details of different incidents. However,once my friend alluded to me and him being cute together and he did go red and laughed.

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He's one happy dude. Why would he ever give up all that attention from other girls to date just one girl. He's a flirt and likes to work it with the ladies.......he's a ladies man.

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Originally Posted by indireloaded [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

actually, i was just teasing you but left off the ;-) i don't know if you are really a cad or not. Sure, go ahead and have an opinion. I love opinions. I love the crunching sound they make when i gnaw on them. Grr.

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hahahahahaha!

OP, from what you said, I think he might be really shy around you and unsure as how to proceed with you. I think you should tell him or otherwise let him explicitly know that you are into him. See how he reacts, as IndieReloaded said. That should give you an idea. I really don't find it all that difficult to imagine a guy sleeping with a girl he likes and NOT trying to have sex with her. He might have at least tried to kiss you, that's for sure... but then, he may be just REALLY shy.

I think you should lay your own cards on the table - you've got nothing to lose after all and if you don't, you may never know.

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Originally Posted by IndiReloaded [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Actually, I was just teasing you but left off the ;-) I don't know if you are really a cad or not. Sure, go ahead and have an opinion. I love opinions. I love the crunching sound they make when I gnaw on them. Grr.

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Buahahahahahaha yeah... you crunch... you Tarzan... you gnaw... you tough... on the Iterwebz ;-) lol

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Originally Posted by smackie9 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

hahahahahaha!

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And smackie again trolling ask a male thread lolz... Well, she has an opinion, you know... because she knows... she read so many books, you know... :-) :-)

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Originally Posted by miffy [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Where do u get the sense of man-hatred? I'm simply annoyed by you implying that just because YOU can't imagine not being intimate when lying in bed twice with a girl, NO man could. THAT is where you are fulfilling a clichée about men in general, one I do not share and it's an image of manhood I reject. I am 27, heterosexual, and have been in several longterm and sexually very active relationships. Not that it matters at all. For that matter, age has nothing whatsoever to do with the level of depth you are capable of. I admit I made the comment out of annoyance and a bit ignorantly so, I'll apologize for that.

However, I am not male-bashing, I am simply stating that you shouldn't lead women to believe that just because you, as a healthy heterosexual man can't imagine intimacy without sex, no straight man could. Your view is one thing, generalizing is another. If you can't realize that I am telling you exactly why THAT is reinforcing a sexist view in itself and defending manhood as much more complex and deep than just that and accuse me of "man-bashing", you have no clue whatsoever.

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1. Where do u get the sense of man-hatred?

From every (second) sentence you write. "more men are douchbages than females", you repeat cliches about men. This is sexist, man-hating bullshit.

Let me repeat now:

I beg you, beseech you, ask of you: please repeat some cliches about females (better still feministas), black people, Jewish people, etc.

Will you do it, smartass? Will you? Until you do, remain silent.

2. I'm simply annoyed by you implying that just because YOU can't imagine not being intimate when lying in bed twice with a girl, NO man could.

You are annoyed at something I never wrote or said. Again, read my posts. If you are annoyed at something in your life in general, like your father, please work on that.

3. THAT is where you are fulfilling a clichée about men in general, one I do not share and it's an image of manhood I reject.

You are repeating cliches again. See my item 1 hereinabove. A lot of women, including here, fulfill some cliches about females. Please repeat some of those cliches about females. I beg of you.

Then again, it is good you have an image of manhood. We can maybe talk about it in a different thread.

4. I am 27, heterosexual, and have been in several longterm and sexually very active relationships. Not that it matters at all. For that matter, age has nothing whatsoever to do with the level of depth you are capable of. I admit I made the comment out of annoyance and a bit ignorantly so, I'll apologize for that.

Apology accepted.

5. However, I am not male-bashing,

Yes, you were. By repeating cliches and hurting stereotypes promoted in order to further the man-hating feminazi agenda of blaming males for all ills of the world and absolving females of all responsibility. I am having none of this bullshit.

6. I am simply stating that you shouldn't lead women to believe that just because you, as a healthy heterosexual man can't imagine intimacy without sex, no straight man could. Your view is one thing, generalizing is another.

Again, I never wrote what you are alluding to. If I have and have forgotten since, can you please quote where I am saying I don't imagine intimacy without sex? Otherwise, you are misrepresenting...

7. If you can't realize that I am telling you exactly why THAT is reinforcing a sexist view in itself and defending manhood as much more complex and deep than just that and accuse me of "man-bashing", you have no clue whatsoever.

Manhood is indeed complex and deep and, truth be told, I am happy you care about it. Men like us, who care about it, need each other to refute this insane man-hating BS that we are being force-fed (suffice to say please watch some "Western" media and mind how men are portrayed there, read some statistics on divorce, divorce settlements, the plight of men in such situations) which is actually hurting females a lot as well.

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Originally Posted by Sixpacj [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Buahahahahahaha yeah... you crunch... you Tarzan... you gnaw... you tough... on the Iterwebz ;-) lol

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LOL, yes exactly. We all have our fun here. Some just have it in non-standard ways. It gets boring giving the same old advice to the same problems. We used to be able to refer to our archive, which was awesome, but I think we lost it when the forum platform was changed several years ago. Anyway, Jane say sorry for invading your Man-Thread, Tarzan.

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Originally Posted by IndiReloaded [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

LOL, yes exactly. We all have our fun here. Some just have it in non-standard ways. It gets boring giving the same old advice to the same problems. We used to be able to refer to our archive, which was awesome, but I think we lost it when the forum platform was changed several years ago. Anyway, Jane say sorry for invading your Man-Thread, Tarzan.

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Hahahahaha yeah, that is actually quite funny Jane ;-)

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Originally Posted by Sixpacj [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

And smackie again trolling ask a male thread lolz... Well, she has an opinion, you know... because she knows... she read so many books, you know... :-) :-)

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Want some cheese with that wine?

[Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

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Originally Posted by Sixpacj [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Buhahahahahahahahahahahaha ;-) cool story, bro ;-)

Let me rephrase: I am now 38 years old. I would NEVER end up in a bed with a woman and just cuddle. I would cuddle after intimacy. I am sure gay men "like" the women they "go to bed together" with, and "cuddle", but I do not think the OP had exactly this in mind when she asked the question.

There are some women I "like" with whom I would cuddle, but never in the same bed. Does this make me damaged? Probably...

There is no way a heterosexual man, past the age of 13 and a half, ends up in bed with you twice and noting happens intimacy wise. Unless, of course, if he is gay or .... ... ... simply not that into you.

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That is where you state exactly that you cannot imagine being in bed with a woman and not try to copulate with her. You even admit it makes you seem damaged. You also say there is "no way" a heterosexual man could keep his cock in his pants apparently, only if he were gay....so that's exactly what i'm talking about, you have your way of doing things and are generalizing for all mankind. That is ignorant, you are reinforcing a sexist clichée about men with your statements, it's not me talking about stereotypes, it's you behaving like one. Again, just because you behave that way doesn't mean all of us do.

Again this is all for the attention, the more you post against him the more attention he is getting.......you are feeding his addiction for getting you all rialled up lol.

Thanks for the quote, I now see where you are coming from.

1. That is where you state exactly that you cannot imagine being in bed with a woman and not try to copulate with her.

Errr.... actually, yes, you are right. With one correction, not always "intimacy"="copulation"...

And yes, If I were in bed with a woman twice and nothing happened (nobody made a move), I'd feel very strange about it. I'd think either she isn't into me, or I am not into her... So, yeah...

2. You even admit it makes you seem damaged.

I was trying to be sarcastic but failed, shoulda put an emoticon there... I may be damaged but probably not for the reason(s) we are discussing here.

3. You also say there is "no way" a heterosexual man could keep his cock in his pants apparently, only if he were gay....so that's exactly what i'm talking about, you have your way of doing things and are generalizing for all mankind.

I think you are making a connection here where there isn't one. True, I think a heterosexual man would not be in bed with a woman twice and nothing would happen. I did not mean to say that only a gay man would do such a thing. A straight man might end up in this position, but there would be something mighty awkward about it, I think...

4. That is ignorant, you are reinforcing a sexist clichée about men with your statements, it's not me talking about stereotypes, it's you behaving like one.

Again, why do you insist on typecasting me as this or that stereotype??? As I wrote before, would you repeat cliches, however justified, about other groups? Would you reproach a Jewish man for acting in a way that reinforces some cliche you hold??? Or a black woman?

I am not reinforcing anything except my own view, based on my experience, if you don't like it, fine present your own opinion, but only because you don't like it, it don't mean my experience or opinion is "wrong" or politically incorrect... I understand I represent about the only group of people (white, heterosexual, non-Jewish males) who can be slurred and denigrated without major consequences, but please... you are going too far...

Only because you hold a certain position it does not mean other opinions are "ignorant".

5. Again, just because you behave that way doesn't mean all of us do.

This much is obvious, but why do you need to state this time and time again? I never said I wanted you to be or act like me? Fine, say you do not agree with me, but what is this? Do I keep telling you that not all people think or act like you? Of course not! Why? Cause it is obvious!

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Originally Posted by miffy [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

That is where you state exactly that you cannot imagine being in bed with a woman and not try to copulate with her. You even admit it makes you seem damaged. You also say there is "no way" a heterosexual man could keep his cock in his pants apparently, only if he were gay....so that's exactly what i'm talking about, you have your way of doing things and are generalizing for all mankind. That is ignorant, you are reinforcing a sexist clichée about men with your statements, it's not me talking about stereotypes, it's you behaving like one. Again, just because you behave that way doesn't mean all of us do.

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fwiw: I give this post two thumbs up. Coming from one man (miffy) (who has no trouble attracting the opposite sex) to another it says much... and, it says it without a hint of misogyny or PUA mentality.

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Originally Posted by smackie9 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Again this is all for the attention, the more you post against him the more attention he is getting.......you are feeding his addiction for getting you all rialled up lol.

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Her again... Why are you posting here then if you don't want to give me attention hahahahaha ;)

No, my objective is not to get off off anyone's emotional turmoil but it is interesting why you should have projected that...

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Originally Posted by Wakeup [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

fwiw: I give this post two thumbs up. Coming from one man (miffy) (who has no trouble attracting the opposite sex) to another it says much... and, it says it without a hint of misogyny or PUA mentality.

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You are projecting your insecurities. Miffy does have an interesting opinion, one that would cater to a female's insecurities, actually, this is his PU method.