Defining relationship?

Been dating someone new for 6 weeks. We spend tons of time together, not just having sex or "hanging out" but real dates, and also double dates with his or my friends. I've met all his friends & any time he goes out, I'm always invited. When the weekend comes he just says, "Ok so what are WE doing this weekend?" Talks about stuff like trips we should go on in the future etc.

Some people (mostly my friends) refer to him as my "boyfriend" and this never seems to bother him. (Like, he'll never correct them or gently talk to me about it.) Also I asked whether he's sleeping with anyone else when it came up in conversation (I wanted to discuss continuing to use condoms vs not). He gave me a clear "no." I'm thinking it's pretty clear what's going on, and I shouldn't make things awkward by bringing up a formal talk right? I'm just the type of person who always wants to know exactly where things stand.

You are having sex, but you are wondering whether or not you are in a relationship?

Yes, I slept with this person very early on, which was something I'd never done before but felt right. but sex has never been the main focus of our time together, not even close actually. Lots of times we'll just be out getting coffee and hanging out.

I don't think you understood my rhetorical question.

You are in a "relationship".

And I think it's ridiculous to be so couscous about defining it when you've gone to the final physical stage of it.

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Originally Posted by toknow [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

And I think it's ridiculous to be so couscous about defining it when you've gone to the final physical stage of it.

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Funny auto correct fail.

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Originally Posted by learning1 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Also I asked whether he's sleeping with anyone else when it came up in conversation (I wanted to discuss continuing to use condoms vs not). He gave me a clear "no." I'm thinking it's pretty clear what's going on, and I shouldn't make things awkward by bringing up a formal talk right? I'm just the type of person who always wants to know exactly where things stand.

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At only six weeks in, I think the discussion about not seeing others is as concrete as you'll get for now. It's far too early to expect anything else.

Just learn to go with the flow

hes acting like your bf. i would have had the conversation 4 weeks ago BEFORE sleeping with him. yes IMO you should ask him to be exclusive and tell him you want this to be a commited relationship coz you really like him and hope he feels the same (which it looks like he does)

where i come from, its not normal to date more than one so i never needed to have this "talk" with my bf. we never defined our relationship but in the us its different and you should have done that ages ago

How would we know? Ask him if he considers u his gf or not.

but is that awkward to just throw out there? some of my friends are like, listen it's only 6 weeks, let things hAPPEN naturally

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Originally Posted by basilandthyme [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Funny auto correct fail.

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Funny comprehension fail.

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Originally Posted by learning1 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

but is that awkward to just throw out there? some of my friends are like, listen it's only 6 weeks, let things hAPPEN naturally

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Are you kidding me, you've slept with the guy and you are asking if it would be awkward to mention the word relationship!?

I just don't want to come off as over-analytical or demanding.

if he's not sleeping with anyone else and doesn't correct anyone when someone calls him your boyfriend then, im pretty sure that you're his girlfriend.

So you've been seeing him for six weeks and you're questioning using condoms?. Get to know him before you give him the privilege of going raw. I don't care what he tells you. That's a silly, inexperienced little girl for you that will get burned and cry because you don't know how it happened. I know plenty of girls that got caught up in BS. Be smart okay. Smdh.

Everyone here who isn't contributing needs to shut up and get the f*ck out of the forum. The OP is asking a question, not to be judged. I'm looking at you, toknow, you ignorant twit. Starnique, you're a close second here.

learning1, if you're not sure, ask. Relationships are about communication, and if you're only 6 weeks in and already on different pages, then long term the chances of success are slim to none. Don't make it a big formal conversation, just ask him if he considers your relationship "exclusive", because you would like it to be. It is that simple.

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Originally Posted by Cerby [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

learning1, if you're not sure, ask. Don't make it a big formal conversation, just ask him if he considers your relationship "exclusive", because you would like it to be. It is that simple.

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Thank you. But he's already confirmed that we're exclusive as in he's not sleeping with anyone else. So in his mind things may be obvious and he may wonder what exactly I need reassurance about. I don't want to look overdramatic

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Originally Posted by Cerby [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Everyone here who isn't contributing needs to shut up and get the f*ck out of the forum. The OP is asking a question, not to be judged. I'm looking at you, toknow, you ignorant twit. Starnique, you're a close second .

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Look, I don't know who the f!#k you think you are but you or your opinion don't mean shit to me. You don't tell me what to contribute and what not to, lets get that straight. Don't try to handle me cause I'm not the one. You clearly have me mixed up.

Op, you're grown and still learning I see. If he's your bf, do him raw or whatever you want. Six weeks just really stood out to me. You don't have to give him all the specials at first. I'm not perfect and I do what I do but I know what I'm doing. I say what I say for a reason but we all have diff experiences and I'm glad I'm so advanced.

The time to discuss where things are going is BEFORE you start sleeping with him. I can't believe you talked to him about not using condoms before you ever know if you're in a committed, exclusive relationship. Ick.

And I don't think it's clear what's going on. Sounds like he's getting a lot of sex without commitment, and beyond that, who knows. Just because your friends call him your BF, doesn't mean he thinks he is.

Regardless, at this point, the horses have already left the barn. But, there is something seriously, seriously wrong if you can discuss having unprotected sex, but don't want to ask him if he considers you a relationship or a **** buddy. Think on that for a bit...

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Originally Posted by learning1 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Thank you. But he's already confirmed that we're exclusive as in he's not sleeping with anyone else. So in his mind things may be obvious and he may wonder what exactly I need reassurance about. I don't want to look overdramatic

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Not sleeping with other girls doesn't mean he's not dating others, nor does it mean he is interested in a relationship.

Again, so messed up you'll talk about raw dogging, but can't discuss the emotional side.

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Originally Posted by namemyname [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I can't believe you talked to him about not using condoms before you ever know if you're in a committed, exclusive relationship. Ick.

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That was the point of getting a clear statement that he isn't sleeping with anyone else before not using condom. as far as dating others? Literally logically impossible sincce he's with me or at his job (a public service job w/late night hours) every single night of the week, and I'm invited to anything he does with his friends. Also... "a whole lot of sex"? he will often ask me to do things that dont involve sex whatsoever, we'll go the whole day without. It's really obvious it isn't his main focus w/me

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Originally Posted by learning1 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

That was the point of getting a clear statement that he isn't sleeping with anyone else before not using condom. as far as dating others? Literally logically impossible sincce he's with me or at his job (a public service job w/late night hours) every single night of the week, and I'm invited to anything he does with his friends. Also... "a whole lot of sex"? he really doesn't even try to get that, often asking me to do things where we go the whole day not even having sex.

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So then what's your question, again?

But really, are you ready to put yourself at a serious health risk after 6 weeks with someone you barely know???

And if he's not asking you for sex, then he's likely getting it elsewhere, unless he considers you more in the friendzone.

You can't have it both ways, and this whole thing is strange. You rarely have sex, but you're asking him to have unprotected sex? Eh?

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Originally Posted by namemyname [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

And if he's not asking you for sex, then he's likely getting it elsewhere, unless he considers you more in the friendzone.

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This is really off base -- I just know it. But you are right in saying that it's stupid for me to not be able to talk to him a bout a relationship/commitment if i can talk about sex without condoms. Maybe I should tell him exactly that... "really, before we have sex without condoms, we should probably make sure we're on the same page with everything else - is this what you'd consider a relationshp? is that what you even want, to be boyfriend/girlfriend?"

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Originally Posted by learning1 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

That was the point of getting a clear statement that he isn't sleeping with anyone else before not using condom. as far as dating others? Literally logically impossible sincce he's with me or at his job (a public service job w/late night hours) every single night of the week, and I'm invited to anything he does with his friends

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No it's not impossible. That comment alone shows your lack of experience and your naivete. I'm not saying he's doing other people, but it's not impossible. Late night hours? Perfect excuse. As I said, I'm not saying that's the case but you're not his gf yet and you have a lot to learn. Talk to him and be real with him. I can see a guy easily getting over on you.

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Originally Posted by learning1 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

This is really off base -- I just know it. But you are right in saying that it's stupid for me to not be able to talk to him a bout a relationship/commitment if i can talk about sex without condoms. Maybe I should tell him exactly that... "really, before we have sex without condoms, we should probably make sure we're on the same page with everything else - is this what you'd consider a relationshp? is that what you even want, to be boyfriend/girlfriend?"

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Well, if you feel that you're not a friend, and that you are more, than yes, definitely ask him!!

And, I still think it's way WAY too soon to put yourself at risk. You don't know this guy. 6 weeks is not a long time, and although you *think* you know his every move, you don't.

If you insist on having unprotected sex, then at least I hope you'll both go get tested first. I mean, seriously. You are aware that some STD's can kill you, render you infertile, or leave you with a permanent virus???

I think there are bigger concerns than the label, frankly. If I were him, I'd be seriously concerned about a girl who wanted to screw me raw, and before we ever discussed where we both saw things going.

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Originally Posted by Cerby [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Everyone here who isn't contributing needs to shut up and get the f*ck out of the forum. The OP is asking a question, not to be judged. I'm looking at you, toknow, you ignorant twit. Starnique, you're a close second here.

learning1, if you're not sure, ask. Relationships are about communication, and if you're only 6 weeks in and already on different pages, then long term the chances of success are slim to none. Don't make it a big formal conversation, just ask him if he considers your relationship "exclusive", because you would like it to be. It is that simple.

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LOL....that's funny coming from a guy who looks like a green pickle. You are way off.

Maybe if you change your picture I will take you more seriously............Nah....you'd have to get a brain transplant for that.

Can you keep a strait face reading what you wrote? I couldn't. Stick with the circus.

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Originally Posted by Cerby [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Everyone here who isn't contributing needs to shut up and get the f*ck out of the forum. The OP is asking a question, not to be judged. I'm looking at you, toknow, you ignorant twit. Starnique, you're a close second here.

learning1, if you're not sure, ask. Relationships are about communication, and if you're only 6 weeks in and already on different pages, then long term the chances of success are slim to none. Don't make it a big formal conversation, just ask him if he considers your relationship "exclusive", because you would like it to be. It is that simple.

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Cerby, as usual, making sense.

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Originally Posted by HDBadger [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Cerby, as usual, making sense.

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LOL....That clown? You are confused, that's called crying, not making sense. Still funny to watch.

cerby, next time I come here, I'm expecting you to have changed your picture to something more appropriate for you........you in a clown suit crying.