What should I do with my boyfriend?

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11-03-14, 11:31 AM
GiveMeLove

What should I do with my boyfriend?

Everytime we hangout, he kept begging me to have sex without using condom. He wants to do pullout method. I wasn't comfortable, but he kept saying I won't get pregnant, and he made it a promise. When I tell him, he won't take me seriously and won't listen. I'm not even ready for a baby! I felt so hesitant to hangout with him. I just wanted to talk and do something fun. I want to wait to have sex when we have a place of our own and birth-control. I should've told him this.. but idk he'll probably brush me off. He kept saying that I wanted it, when I really don't feel like doing it. I try hugging, kissing, and cuddling and giving him bj, but it's not even enough. :(
I try talking to him about it, but he gets upset telling me I won't get pregnant. I think he's in denial.
I don't know if I should leave him? We been together for 3 years. He was my only bff in high school. He's done everything for me. His family LOVES me, and he will be depressed if I leave.

I love him and I know nobody's perfect. I don't know what to do.
11-03-14, 12:09 PM
basilandthyme

Yes, wanting to use the 'pullout' method is a bad idea. A really stinky idea which is likely to leave you pregnant.

If you're not willing to get contraception and have sex with a your boyfriend who's waited soooo long for you, done everything for you and who adores you, I suggest you set him free to find someone who's willing to meet his needs.

Though I will warn you that if you're not willing to compromise on this thing about living together first, you're going to be a virgin for a loooong time. If you're fine with this, then that's great. But do be aware of the consequences of your decision.
11-03-14, 12:15 PM
BackUpOrGetStng

I've been pulling out for years with no problems. The one time I got one passed the goalie, I didn't pull out.

Conclusion: Pulling out works.
11-03-14, 12:34 PM
smackie9

Depending on the indiviual the possablitiy IS STILL THERE to get pregnant.

You are playing russian roulette because chances are he's not going to pull out.

Go on the god damn pill NOW! and make him pay for it if he wants to so bad.

I agree with basilandthyme if you are going to make him wait even longer, you are being unfair to him, especially keep your true intensions a secret, cut him loose so he can find someone that will give him sex. Poor guy.

- - - Updated - - -

Go to your doctor and take a look at all the other methods available like a diaphram, the sponge, the pill, the patch, and make a decision.
11-03-14, 12:43 PM
BackUpOrGetStng

Pulling out NEVER fails!
11-03-14, 01:06 PM
basilandthyme

Quote:

Originally Posted by BackUpOrGetStng [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Pulling out NEVER fails!

Are you shooting blanks there mate?
11-03-14, 01:08 PM
searock

OP, why don't you just use condoms? How old are you?
11-03-14, 01:13 PM
HeartIsAching

Quote:

Originally Posted by BackUpOrGetStng [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I've been pulling out for years with no problems. The one time I got one passed the goalie, I didn't pull out.

Conclusion: Pulling out works.

Anecdotal at best. Bad advice at worst - which this is.

Statistical evidence is that pulling out is far riskier than using proper contraception.
11-03-14, 01:26 PM
basilandthyme

Quote:

Originally Posted by searock [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

OP, why don't you just use condoms? How old are you?

I think it's more about her not wanting to have intercourse with him at all
11-03-14, 02:03 PM
Wakeup

Go to your doctor and ask for an IUD which your doctor will insert. Then the stupid asshole can pull out all he wants.

If you get pregnant then he'd likely run like a donkey whose ass in on fire so don't take a chance on getting pregnant by a man that is not YOUR HUSBAND.

Where in the States are you from that y'all are so laxidasical in your birth control? Where are you from that you'd ask a board full of strangers instead of going to your doctor/free clinic and getting options that will keep you child free and STD free (condoms are for that). Have him get tested and you do too.
11-03-14, 03:16 PM
GiveMeLove

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wakeup [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Go to your doctor and ask for an IUD which your doctor will insert. Then the stupid asshole can pull out all he wants.

If you get pregnant then he'd likely run like a donkey whose ass in on fire so don't take a chance on getting pregnant by a man that is not YOUR HUSBAND.

Where in the States are you from that y'all are so laxidasical in your birth control? Where are you from that you'd ask a board full of strangers instead of going to your doctor/free clinic and getting options that will keep you child free and STD free (condoms are for that). Have him get tested and you do too.

To Wakeup, I live in WA.

We don't live together and I'm savng $ to move out of parents. I did have sex with him and used condoms before.

I changed my mind and I don't want to do it, until we have our own place. I don't want to get an accidental pregnancy even though I'm on birthcontrol, and I hear stories about that. I dont want it to happen to me.

I tried calling him, he won't answer.

To searock- Im 18.
11-03-14, 03:40 PM
pcmaster

GiveMeLove, I think you are doing everything right. At least one in this relationship uses head. You should talk to him say soomething like" that thing is huge just a touch of it can make girl pregrant".
Your BF acting like a child so good that you didnt deny sex at all but looked for alternatives. Otherwise this might seem suspicious that girl dont want to do sex anymore. Still good that you looking into future. Communication is criticaly importand at times like this. Your relationship will be as good as good is communication.

Wish you luck ^_-
11-03-14, 05:05 PM
Starnique

Quote:

Originally Posted by BackUpOrGetStng [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Pulling out NEVER fails!

You're ridiculous.

OP don't let him pressure you into anything you're not comfortable with. Pull out method is crazy because one day its gonna feel too good or y'all will just stop caring...trust me. If you're gonna go raw, get on birth control.
11-03-14, 05:26 PM
Wakeup

Quote:

Originally Posted by GiveMeLove [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

To Wakeup, I live in WA.

We don't live together and I'm savng $ to move out of parents. I did have sex with him and used condoms before.

I changed my mind and I don't want to do it, until we have our own place. I don't want to get an accidental pregnancy even though I'm on birthcontrol, and I hear stories about that. I dont want it to happen to me.

I tried calling him, he won't answer.

To searock- Im 18.

Do NOT move in with this boy. Save your money and use it for College. Not to move in with a boy wait and move in when you are educated and able to take care of YOURSELF without the help of another child. (your boyfriend). If you are on birth control then you shouldn't be as concerned about pregnancy as you are. You are concerned because you know you are too young to be looking after a child when you are not in a relationship that includes TWO educated adults who are committed through marriage and are with jobs that will support yourselves and a child(ren). PC is right, you're smart so think about your future and be prepared through education and a good job BEFORE moving in with him.

Adding: Are you on good terms with your parents, Givemelove?
11-03-14, 10:56 PM
michelle23

Your only 18. Too young to be thinking about living together. Why dont you want to have sex with him? You have been together 3 years. Do you love him? If you do want to then tell him only if he uses condoms and get on the pill
12-03-14, 12:44 AM
pcmaster

18 is perfect age to start living apart from parents. Wish I would left home right at 18. It makes growing up much easier. Well worth it. Your BF should put in just as much efford as you do to make it happen.
14-03-14, 11:01 AM
BackUpOrGetStng

Quote:

Originally Posted by basilandthyme [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Are you shooting blanks there mate?

Nope, I've knocked a girl up before, but not when pulling out.
14-03-14, 11:23 AM
basilandthyme

Quote:

Originally Posted by pcmaster [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

18 is perfect age to start living apart from parents. Wish I would left home right at 18. It makes growing up much easier. Well worth it. Your BF should put in just as much efford as you do to make it happen.

Depends where you live PC. I moved out when I was that age in the mid 80's and never regretted it. But many cities now (including mine) have such exorbitant rents that renting is simply not affordable for someone who hasn't got an established career.