Being used

**TAVS** · 13-09-05, 12:56 AM

I feel sooo used sometimes. In reality, I dont think my ex wants anything to do with me. If you ask me, I think the only reason she still contacts me is because she gets bored and just wants someone to hang out with her. I wouldn't be surprised if I never heard from her again once she moved. Sorry, just felt like posting. She just called me to see if I could leave work and give her a ride home from Target. The sad thing is, I would have done it, if I had driven my truck today. But I'm on the bus so I had to say no. I've done crap like this in the past like the time she called up a couple months ago and had cut her foot. Can you please bring me some bandaids and ointment? Sure, I'll drive right down, give me 20 minutes for the commute. Man, I'm lame.

**nimPy** · 13-09-05, 01:01 AM

I've been used before by a girl who i thought would be a potential girlfriend. Always ask me to the malls and stuff so i can drive. Won't pick up my calls, but would call me when she needs something. Best thing for you to do is just tell her to be more independent and stop asking you for favors. Tell her to find someone else to use

**Lloyd95** · 13-09-05, 01:04 AM

Dude, you're a doormat. You're losing all your self respect, no girl is going to want to be with you.

I know it sucks breaking up and all, but you know that you're not going to be with you; she's moved on, unless she wants to watch her control you like a dog.

You need to go Cold Turkey with no contact; it'll suck for awhile, but after a few days, you'll be thinking of her less and less, and able to move on.

If I lived closer to you, I'd come over and slap some sense into you.

You should go visit Jeblina once you get past this pathetic state you're in.

**Jeblina** · 13-09-05, 01:06 AM

Hmmm....it does sound like she contacts you when she's bored....or not getting enough attention from other people she knows? You're not lame....just a nice guy...and she knows this....

I think it would be wise if you avoided doing any "favors" for her....no matter how she tries to guilt you.....unless it sounds like a REAL emergency......but I don't even know if you should take my advice...I mean, I was the one who was dating Captain ****stick/Dopestick

EDIT* It's a good thing that you can actually SEE that she's using you...and you're not in denial about it.....that way, you'll be able to protect yourself from being used because you actually recognize what it is

**TAVS** · 13-09-05, 01:14 AM

Yea, I don't really think I'm lame. It just irks me sometimes. She doesn't do it intentionally, I dont think. I'm hoping her leading me on for 4-months was genuine and not some lame selfish act to keep me around as a tool. She's really not that type of person. She really is a great girl guys, she's just confused with life and has strange ways of dealing with it. I wish her the best, and once she's gone come Sept 23, I'll be moving on. Don't worry about my confidence either, I've got plenty.

**misombra** · 13-09-05, 03:10 AM

sept. 23d can't come soon enough man you are totally whipped.

**Asip4u** · 13-09-05, 03:12 AM

As long as you both know where you stand, it's really up to you. Some guys are open up about it and actually don't mind being used...lol...I was used once before and it hasn't happened since, simply because i won't allow for it. If i see that things aren't going where i'd like them to, i move on, simple as that. Life is too short to be wasting on those who don't give a shit and just want to use you.

**Ellynn** · 13-09-05, 06:17 PM

Yeah you are too nice. So yeah its easy for her to talk to you....and therefore call you when she needs something. If you honestly don't mind.....then thats cool. I mean I wouldn't put too many feelings into it .....thinking that things are gonna work out. But if you want to be friends....and you can handle it. I say more power to you...

But honestly.....if you want her out of your life and want to move on. Then it would probably be best to drop the "nice guy" act with her. You have to let her know you have a life outside of her.....and then get one. Why put yourself thru that. I have been thru that myself with ex's of mine...and I found the easiest way to move on.......was to cut off contact.

**squirrley** · 14-09-05, 06:06 AM

TAVS, there are some guys who are just truly nice and will always be there for their x's, you sound like one of them, hell my x is too. Super great guy. But I dont bother him in the way yours does, and if she'd call you to go hang out once in awhile it might be nice, but sounds like its just when she doesnt have anyone else to do it for her. Maybe you could try and not do these things everytime she calls upon you. Or freak out one day and call her and ask her for a favor see what she does!

**TAVS** · 14-09-05, 06:11 AM

Good idea Squirrley.

I think I'm just going to let it slide for now. She'll be gone in 10 days anyway. Thanks for all the great coments ya'll.

**TAVS** · 15-09-05, 05:49 AM

Alright, I stood up for myself today, if you want to call it that. So I called her on the phone today to tell her she's used 3000 minutes (50 hours!) on our cell phone plan this month and she's going to have extra charges on our bill. First let me say, I have no clue how anyone could be on the phone that much. I'm half tempted to look at the call records, but I'm trying to resist. Who knows what I might find. Anyway, I digress.

I'm suppose to hang out with her for a while Saturday. *don't be jealous Jeblina* She tells me she also wants to spend some time boxing up her stuff at my house. She says, "I need to get it boxed up and bring it to the apartment, Dad doesn't want to drive out to your house to get my stuff." I was like, we'll that's not my responsibility. Your dad is driving 4 hours to come get you; I think he can survive another 10 minute drive.....

No way am I going to take two trips in my truck hauling all her crap; just to unload it so it can be loaded again a week later. Aye Aye Aye.

Anyway, thought this would be a good addition to my thread.

**Jeblina** · 15-09-05, 09:59 AM

::tries not to be jealous...tries not to be jealous::

Yeah....don't look at the call records unless you're prepared to see the worst.

let sleeping dogs lie....

**Only-virgins** · 15-09-05, 04:30 PM

Hey TAVs. All I see is your threads everywere started by you....seriously...

Tone · 15-09-05, 10:31 PM

I like you, Terry!

**rachel4u** · 19-09-05, 04:50 AM

Arn't we all being used everyday by our surrounding? it's all how you think of it ...

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