Still new at this

[johan]

Ok can I have your opinion on something else too?

I've been to some distant places on vacation where I met some very nice people who did things like help me with directions and they were so kind as to spend quite a lot of time to assist me to find the right building to goto and such. I was thinking next time a stranger helps me like that or I help someone like that would it sound like a good idea to ask them to hang out or if they can show me around sometime rather than just thank them and part? Like could I ask for a email or phone # to get in contact with them later? I personally would like to be friends with such nice people but its hard to make the connection.

[Tedel]

You know? After reading you, I don't think you haven't had any date so far because you are too shy; I think it is because you are too busy.

Some places to meet cool people are parishes or other religious groups, gyms or (daytime) clubs. Don't try to meet people in a bar or disco (nightclub) because people don't go there to meet new friends too seriously.

I agree with Vashti that online dating could be for you. There are free sites like PlentyofFish.com and paid ones like LoveMe.com or ForeignLadies.com, which have a fairly good reputation as far as I'm concerned.

That said, the next advice would be to hold your horses: Women have a sort of detector (a.k.a. 6th sense). They know who is looking for "someone" and they just stay away because they don't want to be a "someone", they want to be loved for what they are (well, who doesn't).

How many friends have you got? "Friendship is the school of love", so perhaps that should be your first objective.

Hope this helps

[vashti]

I think it would be okay to thank someone who helped you with directions (or whatever) by offering to buy them a cup of coffee before parting ways. (More than that might look like a scam to meet women.) If they accept your cup of coffee, you can tell them you've enjoyed their company and wish you could meet up again...

[inspectahdeck]

Man,...this world is 'free roam' in a sense,...you can pretty much go up to anyone and say anything you want,...of course you know the things that are totally unacceptable,..which are mainly just walking up to a girl and saying "hey, wanna ****?" ...let your barriers go and say whatever you want to whoever you want, because guess what if they dont like what you said, do you really think you would want to be their friend/date them?

[johan]

I can't do the online dating thing. Don't think I haven't tried it before and my previous experiences taught me one thing: if I want to get to know a girl and find out what shes really like (and get her interested in me) the best way is to meet her in person and not through computer.

I don't know about the social things that were said. It all sounds good in theory but I have followed them in practice before and it just doesn't work out half as good as I would have wanted it to. I have had so many bad experiences and not a single good one to balance it out. I think I'm disillusioned at this now. I don't believe in love or anything. I don't remember what that emotion was like anymore...

Tell me,
If I look at this in a practical way without any emotion or expectation then is it a good idea to just wait until I finish school and get a high paying job? I have read before that most women say their number one criteria in choosing a man for marriage is not their looks, personality, or style but their salary. Should I wait until I am very financially successful before looking for a girl??

[Moonchild]

Financial success isn't as important as financial stability. If you do end up with a very well-paying job, would you like the type who is more interested in your money than who you are?

[vashti]

I think at your age, smart girls are looking for potential and promise more so than affluence.

Have you heard of or tried "speed dating"?