How to take it from here?

[Gigabitch]

I guess the next question would be whether I should go up to her next time I see her and ask her again, or will that just make me seem desperate/annoying? Should I just wait for her to get back to me?

Man, these questions seem so sophomoric to me but seriously... I worry too much. Especially with so many other things (trouble with my ex's reaction) hanging over my head.

Jim, she knows you're interested. Don't go up and ask her out again.

Another issue, though: The Ex. Ex means ex. What does ex mean to you?

[music_jim]

Jim, she knows you're interested. Don't go up and ask her out again.

Another issue, though: The Ex. Ex means ex. What does ex mean to you?

I know, I know. I shouldn't care what she thinks, I mean hell, she was the one who broke up with me almost a year ago and can't get over it.

I think she's hinting at ending our friendship... which honestly, although it'll hurt like a motherf*cker, would probably be the best thing to happen. I can't be friends with someone who isn't going to support me to the same length that I support her.

It just sucks because I don't have a whole lot of friends, many acquaintances, but not many real friends, so she's basically my best friend.

As I said earlier, I guess there's something to be said about trying to be friends with an ex.

[Gigabitch]

Poison! Doom! Actually, for your own sake, you should end that "friendship" right now. She's like an emotional hemorrhage.

You can't make any real friends in this condition.

[music_jim]

Well, swing and a miss, everybody.

I talked to her a little more today, turns out she doesn't date, she wants to focus on her schoolwork, her parents don't want her to anyway... lots of stuff.

So here I am again, back at square one. I guess I have a new "friend", which doesnt' help me too much. Better than nothing but still...

I just can't get a break, can I?

[clynn]

Well, at least it isn't pesonal!

Some girls are like that - don't want to be distracted by boys while they're in school.

Seems a little silly to me, since what is it all about anyhow?

But, truth be had, boys CAN be VERY distracting.

[music_jim]

Well, at least it isn't pesonal!

Some girls are like that - don't want to be distracted by boys while they're in school.

Seems a little silly to me, since what is it all about anyhow?

But, truth be had, boys CAN be VERY distracting.

I hear ya. I told her it's admirable that she wants to focus on her work and that I really wouldn't distract her or anything... but yeah, not much can really be said. I doubt even the smoothest talker in the world could've saved the situation.

I guess to look on the bright side, I don't have to worry about other guys getting with her. And maybe, just maybe, if I stick around and work slowly.... things could work in the future. I've been there too many times before, but hey... ya gotta do what you gotta do.

[Tone]

Yeah but don't get too hung up on her, like I said it's not the end of the world.. just chalk one up to the game.

You're not gonna win them all... and all those "no's" will make that next "yes" you get so much sweeter.

[music_jim]

I understand. But contrary to girls in the past, this one is actually worthy of waiting around a bit for. Of course, if a better opportunity presents itself, I know where I'll be.

I guess I should admire that she thinks the way she does... I'm the first guy to ask her out in the music dept., and from what I hear a lot of other guys want her, and not in very good ways. At least those guys'll get frustrated and move on. I at least have some patience and control.

[music_jim]

Okay, I guess this still applies to the topic's title, and it's a problem I've had with girls in the past, not just this one.

Ever since I got rejected by this girl, I've kinda been staying out of her sight. I guess it's because I'm humiliated a bit; I put myself out there yet again, in better form than anytime in the past, then crashed and burned.

How long does this feeling of humiliation last? What can I do to get over it and resume normal life? It's hard to think of because as much as I want to go on normally, I can't turn off my emotions or my feelings for this girl (nor do I really want to). And I see her on an almost daily basis.

Seriously though, it's becoming a pain in the ass to take the long way around to all my classes anymore.

[Tone]

It will last for as long as you choose to focus on it.

What have you got to be ashamed about? Because you went after something you wanted? That's nothing to be ashamed about, jim, - that's something to be proud of. You did something A LOT of people won't ever do... because of their fears and insecurities.

She should respect you for it, especially if you are still holding your head high, smiling, and acting as if it's no big thang... which it isn't. So stop allowing your insecurities to trick you into thinkin it is.

[clynn]

No, don't feel ashamed or shy or anything!

You want a relationship and you want one with her...

....she doensn't want to date in her life right now. All she will feel is good and flattered in your company. Feel pleased that you made someone feel good about themselves.

[Gigabitch]

Ever since I got rejected by this girl, I've kinda been staying out of her sight. I guess it's because I'm humiliated a bit; I put myself out there yet again, in better form than anytime in the past, then crashed and burned.

Of course, you're not supposed to feel humiliated. You're supposed to be the super high-functioning person you know you were meant to be, just like everyone else on LF.

That said, I think you'll feel like shit until you find someone else to concern yourself with.

[music_jim]

Thanks for all the great advice, everyone. You're all correct. And Tone, what you said is actually very similar to what I wrote in my notebook earlier; I rant in my notebook, it's like therapy. But yeah, I shouldn't let my insecurity make me think that something bad happened.

Again, thanks for the help from all of you. Hopefully this will turn out well, if not, hopefully it'll just make me stronger, like the experience with the last girl did to me.

[daisy]

Hope everything will be good for you!!!