And So I Died Of A Broken Heart...

hey, this is my first post. i found this forum while looking for advice.

well where to start...

The Beginning.

the most beautiful girl ive ever seen. she breaks up with her boyfriend whos a drug addicted, alchoholic, piece of crap that doesnt have a job and cheated on her constantly (also hit her). we start dating, she is staying with a friend and doesnt have a place to live. we start living together shortly after.

things are great we are truly in love i would do anything for her.

months go by, we begin to smoke marijuana on occasion eventually it takes over our lives. we would fight about things but never get any resolution. we would just brush it off and not deal with the problem. and smoke some more weed. things get bad and the exciting "newness" of the relationship wears off. eventually it gets to be too much.

she leaves me...

i cant believe this would ever happen. we were supposed to get married and have kids. we had problems but it wasnt the end of the world. she loved me what happened???

i realize that my drug abuse had made me a different person than i was and stop cold turkey. and will never touch the stuff. this means nothing to her obviously as she continues to use occasionally.

she refuses to talk about the break up and nothing seems to change her mind. she has built a wall around her heart and thrown me out. she says she has never been single and doesnt know who she is, she needs to find herself.

2 months later i find out that she is back with her old boyfriend and may be engaged.

i would give the world the world to see this girl smile.

what is wrong with her and what do i do?

sounds like you're trying to blame it on the weed instead of just of accepting that it isn't going to work

Drugs and relationships don't mix.

Women who make a habit of choosing men who abuse drugs do so because they are getting something out of it. It may be nothing more than she gets to look like the "good" guy while he uses, or she gets to look like a hero if she can persuede him to stop. It is a win-win situation, in a sick sort of way.

She must not have considered her level of drug abuse to be on par with either yours or the old guy if she continues to partake on occassion, and although I do not condone drug use, there is a difference between an occassional user and a regular user.

In the end, though, what is going on in her head doesn't matter. You need to focus on moving forward rather than wallowing in the past.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by aplesandoranjes

what is wrong with her and what do i do?

---

Was that a serious question?

Because I feel compelled to laugh at you.

I think when you've been drug-free for about a year, things will be a lot easier to understand. Right now, you're reeling from all of this. You're not going to die of a broken heart.

Make a clean break from her and her messed-up choices, and make a new life for yourself.

You might want to think about relocating, at least temporarily. The people you have around you now were used to the pot-head loser who couldn't get along with his girlfriend. They may resist change.