My husband and I are both in our early 30s.
What should I do when my husband turns down sex with me to watch porn right after I go to sleep (sometimes in the same room that I am sleeping in.)
When we do have sex it is pretty kinky. I am very experimental and willing. I've tried new toys and outfits, losing over 65lbs (mostly for myself, but I thought it would help). When we do engage in intercourse he seems to enjoy it, but lately it has only been about once every two weeks. If I approach him a few days afterwards and try to initiate something he will tell me "didn't you just get it the other day?" Every time we have sex it has to be this whole big kinky ordeal. The days of quickies are over. Now he plans it when he wants it, and when he doesn't I go without.
We have had a few problems with him sexting a coworker in the past (to this day I am not permitted to speak an ill word about her) and him signing up for sexting sites, which he claims to have done out of curiousity and no desire to cheat---despite specifically searching for younger girls in our area. He swears he would never cheat on me, that he loves me and would die before losing me. I believe that he loves me...but I just don't know what to do. I feel like I have tried everything: paying more attention to him in and out of the bedroom, trying not to add any extra stress, sending him cute or sexy texts, talking to him, etc. Nothing works. He tells me what I want to hear and then he just hides it better the next time. It always seems to turn around to be my fault some how, without him actually acknowledging my points.
I just don't understand how he can say I am so sexy all the time, yet he choses to watch porn over being intimate with me.