Why is my fiance acting this way?

[MikeT323]

I caught my fiance texting another guy and she lied about it until I confronted her with the evidence. She also stored 3 of her ex boyfriends numbers under females names so I wouldn't be suspicious. She said this was because she felt I was too good to be true and we was only 3 months into the relationship. But now that I have forgiven her, she is very insecure now. I am not allowed to have my phone on silent, I can't go to the gym late at night anymore, she claims I go to the gym too much, I do go 5 to 6 days a week for 2 hours at a time though, every time my kids mom calls, she wants to know and know what we talked about and I think she snoops through my phone, but I'm not sure. But she has only started acting like this every since I caught her in those lies. Is this because she is having an affair or has she realized I'm a good man and she seen how close she was to losing me? Also I blatantly tell her in her face that she is a liar and I don't trust her, but she still insist on marrying me. Why?

[Wakeup]

I caught my fiance texting another guy and she lied about it until I confronted her with the evidence. She also stored 3 of her ex boyfriends numbers under females names so I wouldn't be suspicious. She said this was because she felt I was too good to be true and we was only 3 months into the relationship. But now that I have forgiven her, she is very insecure now. I am not allowed to have my phone on silent, I can't go to the gym late at night anymore, she claims I go to the gym too much, I do go 5 to 6 days a week for 2 hours at a time though, every time my kids mom calls, she wants to know and know what we talked about and I think she snoops through my phone, but I'm not sure. But she has only started acting like this every since I caught her in those lies. Is this because she is having an affair or has she realized I'm a good man and she seen how close she was to losing me? Also I blatantly tell her in her face that she is a liar and I don't trust her, but she still insist on marrying me. Why?

I think a better question is why DO YOU want to marry her if you believe she is a liar and you don't trust her?

[basilandthyme]

Agree with Wakeup. Given all the issues, why do you want to marry her? This is a disaster in the making

[MikeT323]

Because I'm so in love with her

- - - Updated - - -

Why do you feel it's a disaster waiting to happen?

[Wakeup]

Reposting with some changes:

Love has nothing to do with whether or not a relationship will be successful and happy. If you can't trust her then you will not be in a successful and happy relationship. At this point, if you marry her now I predict ex-wife No. 2 in your near future.

If she is being untrustworthy then you have good reason not to trust her. If you are acting suspect and shady then she won't trust you either (perhaps why she is always wondering where you are and what you're doing and wants you to cut down your not-with-her-time????? If you're always in the gym, when the hell do you have time to nurture a relationship? She likely feels lonely when or if you're never with her.

[TheEvilJester]

Wait... so she is the one who proves herself untrustworthy and then SHE gets super paranoid with YOU? Have you given her any reason to possibly believe you may not be trustworthy? If not, then I might venture to guess she is acting this way as an attempt to deflect the mistrust that would be directed her way. That, or I might think she was doing something untrustworthy, which has made her paranoid that maybe you are as well.

Love is definitely the most important thing in any relationship, but it is not THE ONLY important thing. Love can easily be poisoned and turned into something much more sinister, and mistrust is one big way to do that. If you cannot trust her, that is not love that will last, and it will only end with you being hurt. So, I have to agree with the general consensus here. I don't think I'd personally recommend still marrying her. Not unless she grows the heck up first. But, that will have to be your decision.

All the same, spending 5 or 6 days a week in the gym, 2 hours each time, that is quite a bit. I hate to discourage somebody from such a healthy hobby, but how does that leave much time for you two? Whether you do wind up staying with her, or wind up with another gal someday, how do you expect to have much time for them? Unless you happen to be with somebody who shares your passion for the gym, I kind of lean towards thinking you may need to cut that back while in a relationship. Trust me, I almost hate saying that, because I hate advising somebody to stop doing something that is so good for their health. I certainly wouldn't advise you to stop. But, maybe cut back somewhat so as to have more time for your significant other. Though, frankly I am not so sure this is the gal for whom you should want to cut back. Again, though, that is your decision.