Am i crazy?

[Bels]

Ok so, beginning of this year I met up with this guy who i have known since I was 16. Its the first time we had hung out together when neither of us had been in a relationship. One thing lead to another after a drunken night out and things... happened. The next day he hinted to me about seeing a film that was in the cinema and i suggested we go, we had lunch together then watched the film and had such a lovely day. About a week later we went out again and things happened again and then the next day he suggested watching a film together. We sat on the sofa and watched movies and he insisted on holding my hand and cuddling me and we stayed like that pretty much the whole day, In fear that it was becoming obvious that I liked him and i didn't want to scare him incase he didn't feel the same I told him I wanted to be single this year after coming out of a 4 year relationship only 5 months prior.. so stupid of me I know. I then took him to his house and the following day he went back to uni. For about a month I didn't hear anything from him, then every now and then I would get the odd facebook message. Now he is back from uni for the summer and I messaged him and we have been chatting quite frequently, the other day I asked him if he fancied coming out with me and some friends on a night out, he was vague in his response and said yes the day before the event. Then the day of he was asking for my address and details saying he will come round earlier and we will spend the day together, then he messages me minutes later saying he double booked himself and can no longer come. My friends say if he really liked me he would make an effort with me and he would have chosen me over his forgotten plans.
I really really like this guy and I can't get him out of my head but am i being crazy? Does he like me?
I don't want to ask him to another event because I feel the ball is in his court now seeing as he let me down last minute.

What do I do? Help please!

[pcmaster]

I suggest dont give up if you like him. Try to get together with the guy again.

[TheEvilJester]

Well, I can't really comment on your sanity in general. ;-) Heck.... I wouldn't have any room to talk anyway. I can't even get all the voices in my head to agree on my own sanity.... or lack-there-of. LOL!

However, in this case I will say that you are not insane. Yes, it is possible he likes you. I mean, people don't usually have things "happen" with somebody they don't like. Of course, it is entirely possible he only likes you because things "happen" when you two get together.... but it could also be entirely possible that things "happen" when you two get together BECAUSE he likes you.

Also, it is possible that he did think he liked you.... but when you kind of pumped the breaks on him that made him worry you didn't really feel the same so he decided to back pedal. Believe me, I'm not blaming you. I can understand you sort of gut-reacted out of a fear that maybe things were moving too fast.... that maybe you'd get hurt. It's not like you are the only person ever guilty of doing/saying something you later regretted. I think we've ALL done that at some point.

IF he did sincerely like you, then it is not necessarily too late. Maybe it is, but it is just as possible that maybe it is not. Honestly, the only way to find out is to give it a try. You could try setting up plans to get together again. The thing is, if he thinks you just want to be friends, he may just continue to be as unreliable about plans as before. What might honestly be better is to just go ahead and ask him out. Make it clear you mean on a date. You could even, if you wish, say something to him kind of like "I know before I told you I wasn't ready for any new relationship, and at the time I did need some time. But now I do feel ready to move on and I'd actually like us to date again if you'd be up for that as well."

Maybe don't actually use the R word since you don't necessarily want to scare him into thinking you are rushing things. Maybe somebody else could suggest how to word that a little better, but I think you get the basic idea.

Unless ask you may never know. If he's not interested in you as more than a friend, wouldn't you be better of knowing? If he IS, then maybe he's just reluctant because he thinks you are not. Good luck to you!