EX girlfriend showed up out of the blue> really confused

[shypshnius]

By the way, do you think she would respect me more if i just told her i'm tired of playing her games and blocked her?

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I honestly wanna make her feel bad about the way she was treating me the last couple days. I want to message her something like: "Honestly, i'm actually glad you finally showed your true colours. No wonder you got no female friends and only get along with guys. You're just an attention whore and i think you understand it yourself". And then instantly block her. What do you think? Would that be too harsh?

[GLYC]

That's awful. Never use putdowns. You have things incredibly backward, do none of that.

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That makes you sound so butthurt, and while it's okay to express disappointment, that's a very childish way to do so.

When women I'm dating are disrespectful to me, I literally say things like "You know what, this wasn't cool". I don't yell, I dont use putdowns

You should just walk away. This relationship will be so hard to fix, it sounds like both of you have made some pretty grainy mistakes that would be hard to recover from

[madotnw_nihs]

So it was clear from the start she likes to play games and mess with your mind. Just walk away.

[TheEvilJester]

Agreed with GLYC. Why let yourself be lowered to her level? Believe me, I think we can all understand how tempting it can be to tell somebody off. But, it really doesn't do you any good. Heck, it can even just wind up causing worse drama than you'd have had if you just let it go.

My personal advice would be to just politely but firmly tell her something like "Look, I was find meeting up as friends, but it doesn't seem to me like you are sincere in that. I think it would be better if we just go our separate ways. Best of luck to you."

You don't really achieve anything by telling her off. You really just risk making yourself look like the bad guy when you have every right to be upset. It would be one thing if SHE came after you calling you nasty names and whatever. You have every right to defend yourself and tell her in no uncertain terms to go away. But, name calling (such as calling her an attention whore) is just not worth it. You MAY even be right.... but what exactly is it going to achieve? Even if you ARE right, she'll never admit it and she'll probably never change. The more likely result is she'll just blow up at you and return the name calling. It is more likely to just wind up as much more frustration than you need.

[GLYC]

Agreed with GLYC. Why let yourself be lowered to her level? Believe me, I think we can all understand how tempting it can be to tell somebody off. But, it really doesn't do you any good. Heck, it can even just wind up causing worse drama than you'd have had if you just let it go.

My personal advice would be to just politely but firmly tell her something like "Look, I was find meeting up as friends, but it doesn't seem to me like you are sincere in that. I think it would be better if we just go our separate ways. Best of luck to you."

You don't really achieve anything by telling her off. You really just risk making yourself look like the bad guy when you have every right to be upset. It would be one thing if SHE came after you calling you nasty names and whatever. You have every right to defend yourself and tell her in no uncertain terms to go away. But, name calling (such as calling her an attention whore) is just not worth it. You MAY even be right.... but what exactly is it going to achieve? Even if you ARE right, she'll never admit it and she'll probably never change. The more likely result is she'll just blow up at you and return the name calling. It is more likely to just wind up as much more frustration than you need.

Exactly. You learn that you can only control how you show up in life.

I've had cases where I even apologized to women after we got into disagreements where there was little of it being my fault. Situations where I was possibly 1% at fault, or I happened to hurt a woman's feelings while defending myself, I apologized.

Life isn't about being a cold jerk.

You need to be what you want to attract. And any woman that showed up like how I described in my last post and this post, I would look at her as being even more attractive due to her great morals.

[TheEvilJester]

Agreed.

It can be really tempting to tell people off when they have wronged you. I think we have all been there at some point in our lives. You can't help that part of you thinks the person deserves to be punished for their misdeeds, that they don't just deserve to get away with it. Heck, in many instances, that IS actually probably true. They probably do deserve to be punished..... but life will eventually take care of that for you. Karma's a b*tch. In the short term, you may feel like you are punishing them, but more often than not you are really just punishing yourself. Better to let go of the negativity they represent and move on.

Could have been a whole different story if she sincerely wanted a chance to let you back into her life. Even if just as a friend, even if she still felt you two didn't work as a couple. As long as she had been sincere about it and had treated you with respect it could have been different. But, seems like she just wants to jerk you around and lead you on. So, better just to leave her in your past in my personal opinion.