Should I travel hours for someone I barely know?

[SuperR0ckz]

There's this girl I like working in a store next to the store I work in, we talked only a couple of times and it was fun, we had a laugh together and there was some teasing. But she was only working there for only a few days before being transferred to another location quite far away.

However on her last day, I planned to ask for her number but decided to delay it for the so called "opportune" moment. Suddenly, there was a lot of work to do and by the time I finished it, she smiled and said goodbye from her store. I tried to look her up on social media but there is just too many and I feel like a dirty stalker xD

After spending some time regretting, I recalled that she is going to another location for work in a few days, it's around 2 hours to get there, and I don't have the exact place so I'm going to have to look. Should I go? Or has the opportunity passed and I'll look very desperate travelling hours just to get her number. HELP!

[pcmaster]

You seem quite young. Reminding me of myself when I was a teenager. Anyway try to look her up on FB again and if you dont find her then go to her new store and dont just ask for number, ask her out on a date too. Basicaly be bold, dont hide your intentions, do whatever you want, be how you wanna to be at the moment.

[Hooo!]

Why not?
But then you make sure you tell her the truth in a playful way. Can’t go like”hey I was just around and I thought I’d drop by.”
No one would believe that.


Tell
That you wanted to kick yourself because you weren’t brave enough to ask for her number and that you would have liked to get to know her more privately and because you feel she is a ___ person you made a little effort to correct your mistake. But now you are a little embarrassed because you are looking like the big stalker coming out to see her and hopefully she won’t mind? :-)

- - - Updated - - -

Gotta have some balls for that one
And maybe she sais no.
But on the other hand
What do you have to lose?

[GLYC]

I would just Facebook her. And send her a message that's pretty direct.

Also. I would never show up to a woman's place of employment like that unless we were pretty damn serious already. .
That can be some pretty scary behavior for some women (stalkerish signs)
Plus, you wouldn't even know if she'd be working at that time and a 2 hour drive? Yeah, no thanks.

[Hooo!]

What glyc said is also true.
That is why i would - IF you want to do it - be very anti stalkerish/freakish. Give her your number not ask for hers for example. Let her every freedom to take a next step if she wanted to.

[TheEvilJester]

I'm glad some others have chimed in on this. I saw this one before there were any other responses, but I kind of wasn't sure how to feel on this one. My gut instinct, personally, would be to say you shouldn't travel 2 hours out of your way to MAYBE run into some girl you barely know. Even though we know your intentions are innocent, that could very well come off seeming kind of stalkerish. ...At the same time, I wasn't sure if maybe I was way off base and something like that could seem super sweet/romantic. It does seem some of the others shared my concerns, though, that it could possibly be poorly misinterpreted.

Is there any way you can find her on social media? That really would be your best bet, to just add her on some social media and hope to start chatting there. I know you said you tried and didn't find her, but did you maybe not look all that thoroughly. To be perfectly honest, I think in this day and age almost everybody does that. Sure, I can understand why if may feel a little stalkerific, but people's social media is out there for anybody to find. There are certainly actions that may cross the line, but just looking for her on social media in hopes of adding her/talking to her is not, in and of itself, stalkerish.

If you absolutely cannot find her on any social media, then, I don't know.... I guess I'd say maybe just assume your chance has passed. I mean, unless you know anybody from your place of work/nearby who may actually be friends with her and could give her your number. Something like that. But, if you otherwise have no way to connect to her, I don't necessarily think I'd suggest traveling all that way to ask her out/ask for her number.

Again, though, maybe that is just me. I don't know.

[SuperR0ckz]

I'm glad some others have chimed in on this. I saw this one before there were any other responses, but I kind of wasn't sure how to feel on this one. My gut instinct, personally, would be to say you shouldn't travel 2 hours out of your way to MAYBE run into some girl you barely know. Even though we know your intentions are innocent, that could very well come off seeming kind of stalkerish. ...At the same time, I wasn't sure if maybe I was way off base and something like that could seem super sweet/romantic. It does seem some of the others shared my concerns, though, that it could possibly be poorly misinterpreted.

Is there any way you can find her on social media? That really would be your best bet, to just add her on some social media and hope to start chatting there. I know you said you tried and didn't find her, but did you maybe not look all that thoroughly. To be perfectly honest, I think in this day and age almost everybody does that. Sure, I can understand why if may feel a little stalkerific, but people's social media is out there for anybody to find. There are certainly actions that may cross the line, but just looking for her on social media in hopes of adding her/talking to her is not, in and of itself, stalkerish.

If you absolutely cannot find her on any social media, then, I don't know.... I guess I'd say maybe just assume your chance has passed. I mean, unless you know anybody from your place of work/nearby who may actually be friends with her and could give her your number. Something like that. But, if you otherwise have no way to connect to her, I don't necessarily think I'd suggest traveling all that way to ask her out/ask for her number.

Again, though, maybe that is just me. I don't know.

Well thank you everyone for all your advice, I know it may seem stalkerish but it was one of those times where we got along enough to be friendly when we met. In the end, I did go and found her, took 1 hr mustering enough courage and I got her no. And other social media stuff. I made it as casual as possible and I think it went alright.

[TheEvilJester]

Hey, well, then I am glad to be wrong. I think, kind of, therein lies the distinction. Maybe she likes you/enjoys your company... so she didn't necessarily think anything of it. If she wasn't all that terribly interested, or barely knew you are whatever, then maybe it would have seemed creepy and stalkery.

Now that I think of it (wish this had occurred to me before) if there was any simple way to sort of explain away casually why you'd happen to be somewhere two hours away, that could have been a good way to approach it. Not that I generally promote lying, but that would really be more like a little white lie. If you two hit it off and became a thing, it could even be a cute story for later. I think that was mainly what made it seem to some of us that it could be misconstrued as being stalker activity. The fact that it seemed like a lot to go two hours out of your way just to hopefully get a chance to ask her out. Not that we thought it WAS stalkery (at least I didn't, I don't know about anybody else) but that it could seem that way and just put her off.

Anyway, whatever. Doesn't matter now because you did it and it worked well... and I am VERY happy to have been wrong. Good luck! I hope it continues to go well.