The ex you can't forget

[vashti]

When is he coming? Can you get some time alone with your boyfriend when he comes? (I am referring to your son.)

[Gigabitch]

When is he coming? Can you get some time alone with your boyfriend when he comes? (I am referring to your son.)

It's a daughter, and yes, I can. I'm much more concerned about how to handle the time with her around- how do I present this? I haven't dated anyone since I got divorced (except for that stupid rebound fiasco, and God forbid she ever learns of that). She's met the ex-boyfriend before, but doesn't remember him very well. I don't want to freak her out, but I don't want to deceive her, either.

Where the hell is he supposed to sleep?

[vashti]

You have a daughter? I am shocked! All this time I thought it was a boy. I even think of him as gigaboy.

Anyway, in my experience, it is best to allow her to think of him as simply a friend of yours and avoid overly-friendly physical contact with him in her presence. Of course, this depends on how resiliant she is, and how bonded she is to your ex-husband.

[King Zarathu]

Holy shit, Giga has kids?! I never knew of this!

Sorry, Giga...I'm going to have to be vashti's now....

Wait...vashti has kids too...oh my God....

::kills himself::

[Gigabitch]

You have a daughter? I am shocked! All this time I thought it was a boy. I even think of him as gigaboy.

Anyway, in my experience, it is best to allow her to think of him as simply a friend of yours and avoid overly-friendly physical contact with him in her presence. Of course, this depends on how resiliant she is, and how bonded she is to your ex-husband.

Well, I've discussed the idea of a long-distance boyfriend with her. She has a friend at school who can relate- his mom has a guy in Phoenix who comes into town about once a month. The kids actually like him so much it's hard for the mom to get time alone with him. I can see Cali Boy ending up being this popular with my kid- I just don't know how to present it to her- does mommy's friend sleep in her room? Ack!

[Gigabitch]

Holy shit, Giga has kids?! I never knew of this!

Sorry, Giga...I'm going to have to be vashti's now....

Wait...vashti has kids too...oh my God....

::kills himself::

I thought you were smart.

[King Zarathu]

Me? Intelligent? Who are you bullshitting?

[vashti]

Well, I've discussed the idea of a long-distance boyfriend with her. She has a friend at school who can relate- his mom has a guy in Phoenix who comes into town about once a month. The kids actually like him so much it's hard for the mom to get time alone with him. I can see Cali Boy ending up being this popular with my kid- I just don't know how to present it to her- does mommy's friend sleep in her room? Ack!

Does she stay up late? Maybe you can make up the couch like he is going to sleep there for the sake of appearances. This way, if things don't work out with him, she isn't looking at him as someone mom was intimate with, ya know?

[Gigabitch]

Does she stay up late? Maybe you can make up the couch like he is going to sleep there for the sake of appearances. This way, if things don't work out with him, she isn't looking at him as someone mom was intimate with, ya know?

Good point. We're still at the "contemplating signing the lease" as he puts it. I guess I need to ask him how he wants to be introduced to everyone here. "Hi, this is Cali Boy. He's my LD booty call, in for the weekend. I had to import him because the guys here suck rocks."

[vashti]

Yeah, I guess it could feel a bit odd to be calling a grown man your "boyfriend". Maybe he has a preference for another title.

[Gigabitch]

The mind reels. I am so damned crude sometimes. it never shows unless you know me, though. Most people think I'm somewhat prim.

[precious]

I broke up with my "ex I cant forget" just less than 8 years ago. I can't get the guy out of my mind. I love the man I'm with. But my ex still ingers from time to time. And once in a while I think about him when things are bad btwn me and my man. I dont want to ever get back with him, he broke my heart, i didnt get over him for years! But like I said, hes still dangling in my thoughts every now and then.

[Gigabitch]

I broke up with my "ex I cant forget" just less than 8 years ago. I can't get the guy out of my mind. I love the man I'm with. But my ex still ingers from time to time. And once in a while I think about him when things are bad btwn me and my man. I dont want to ever get back with him, he broke my heart, i didnt get over him for years! But like I said, hes still dangling in my thoughts every now and then.

So why do you think that is? Is it because he was the love of your life or just because you have unfinished business with him?

[Mathias]

Mathias and I both have this- an ex we can't forget.

My story: Whirlwind romance 12 years ago, I broke up with him because I'm a fool but we stayed in touch, I was with my husband for almost 11 years, we got divorced, now I want my ex back.

I went to see him in California last month and we reconnected in a very physical way. Now we are e-mailing and talking on the phone, but not enough for my taste, and we're both pretty stumped about what to do with this whole California / New Mexico problem. Neither of us is planning to relocate.

What about you, Mathias?

Seriously, I didn't even see this thread until now. I apologize.

Mine's interesting. We met in summer camp when I was FOURTEEN (yes, TEN years ago for those of you who are counting). She was the first girl I really liked...and we did all the cutesy stuff that fourteen year olds do. We held hands, we kissed awkwardly, and we cried and hugged when we left.

The thing is, we've been in random contact ever since. When I was seventeen, she came to where I lived to visit a college, and we made out. Later that year, we went to prom together in HER hometown. She invited me all the way down, her parents paid for my plane ticket, etc. Nothing really happened, as she had a boyfriend at the time (we cuddled on the couch that night, etc, but nothing else). Then, she visited me at my college once, which was way out of the way.

Then, we both got into separate relationships. Hers was for three years, mine for four.

However, we BOTH just ran into the same problem. Both our (now) exes decided they didn't want to do it anymore, and so we've been communicating again to help each other through it. There has been flirting in the e-mails/conversations, but nothing serious.

I've seen this girl for a total of 34 days in my entire life. Yet, I'm like Giga...every time this comes around, I think about her. Yipe.

[Alexander84]

Who doesnt wonder on what actually was and how things could have been, sounds completely natural to me moreso when current relationships are in a time of turbulence, there'll always be some form of reminisce.