What do women want.

[vashti]

its not just alcohol and a nice car that will make women like you, i have had girls offer me sex based on reputation (not sexual reputation but my circle of friends), that to me is ****ing pathetic, most guys would never even think about having sex with someone just because their friends are connected or considered "cool" - i remember Tupac saying in the resurrection documentary "i was in the club one year before i got famous and couldnt find someone to dance with - saying i am too short or too skinny, after i became famous i was in the same club and the SAME girls that didnt like me the year before were all over me"

in my opinion when meeting women, having a good "heart" dont mean shit

I think your problem lies in your definition of "woman". It sounds to me like you are still dating young girls.

[CAM]

No...not Dr. Phil But, I actually do have four university degrees (one of which is a Ph.D.)

[jurupa]

In fact, it is a societal sickness of focusing on women's emotions and pleasure..."what women want," etc. Ironically, the very generation of women who said that they didn't want to be put on a pedestal are silently demanding that we ask "What makes women happy?"--essentially, commanding attention.

Like I said before, girls will say one thing and do another. Very few girls actually say then follow up doing it.

In the long run, it means naught. Live your life. If you find a girl/guy who makes you happy--great. If not, great, too. Friends of mine find this approach too passive--they tell me: "But Cam, you have to make a concerted effort...otherwise you'll be alone." Alone is better than obsessively worrying about how to please someone else and to serve their needs.

True, but I don't think your friends are saying to obsessively worry about it, but more make and effort every now and then.

Take a look at the Wall Street Journal weekend edition today (4/20)--20 and 30 somethings are sooo used to praise and people serving their needs that they can't have a normal relationship--their narcissism gets in the way. So, perhaps we should be a little bit less obsessed with some deterministic way of getting a woman or a guy--making their personal pleasure centers turn on is not the sole basis of personal or interpersonal happiness...and our obsession with it might explain why women get big boob implants and why guys are obsessed with their dicks.

Uh I am not one of those's 20 somethings that are used to bring praise and people serving my needs. But I do know what your talking about but it is actually entitlement issues that they get.

[vashti]

Men's biggest problem is focusing solely on what makes her happy. Men would be a lot less obsessed with their penis size if they weren't under the impression that women think that is important...and while we get these quiet wink-and-nod emails/blogs that say "big enough to get the job done," there are always the sly smiles which lead one to believe otherwise.

In fact, it is a societal sickness of focusing on women's emotions and pleasure..."what women want," etc. Ironically, the very generation of women who said that they didn't want to be put on a pedestal are silently demanding that we ask "What makes women happy?"--essentially, commanding attention.

Actually, I think the key to genuine happiness is having the ability to find meaning in serving others - not by impressing them with the size of our secondary sex characteristics, but by connecting on a soul level and giving people (regardless of gender) what they *really* need, which is usually a meaningful connection to other people. I also think lots of women spend their time trying to figure out what men want and how they can give it to them.

And for the record, I like it up on my pedestal.

It is interesting to see other people's perceptions of women, and I have to wonder what kind of people some of you guys are exposing yourselves to. I don't know how you all find such trivial people to hang around. I must be naturally repelling them.

[misombra]

Men's biggest problem is focusing solely on what makes her happy. Men would be a lot less obsessed with their penis size if they weren't under the impression that women think that is important...and while we get these quiet wink-and-nod emails/blogs that say "big enough to get the job done," there are always the sly smiles which lead one to believe otherwise.

In fact, it is a societal sickness of focusing on women's emotions and pleasure..."what women want," etc. Ironically, the very generation of women who said that they didn't want to be put on a pedestal are silently demanding that we ask "What makes women happy?"--essentially, commanding attention.

In the long run, it means naught. Live your life. If you find a girl/guy who makes you happy--great. If not, great, too. Friends of mine find this approach too passive--they tell me: "But Cam, you have to make a concerted effort...otherwise you'll be alone." Alone is better than obsessively worrying about how to please someone else and to serve their needs.

Take a look at the Wall Street Journal weekend edition today (4/20)--20 and 30 somethings are sooo used to praise and people serving their needs that they can't have a normal relationship--their narcissism gets in the way. So, perhaps we should be a little bit less obsessed with some deterministic way of getting a woman or a guy--making their personal pleasure centers turn on is not the sole basis of personal or interpersonal happiness...and our obsession with it might explain why women get big boob implants and why guys are obsessed with their dicks.

lol i love to watch guys get defensive about the penis size thing lol. i don't know why. maybe because deep down and even superficially i could really give a ****. if a man is truly in love with a woman he doesn't care what her breasts look like. if a woman is truly in love with a man it doesn't matter what his penis size is. i guess the funny thing is is that guys seem to get a lot more defensive and insecure about it than women do.

btw i have had luck with the search, and i also enjoy my pedestal.

also, i would like to see details of this study about being self involved and all...

[enterprise]

What do women want?

Me, of course.

[Gribble]

'Sombra, I think what it comes down to is this: if I meet a girl I truly love, I could care less what size breasts she has or how great her ass is. None of that really matters. But what if her vagina wasn't good enough to get me off? I don't know... what if it was always dry and loose? That's the problem. Some guys feel as though maybe they aren't physically capable of satisfying a woman. Large breasts are just aesthetics, they don't have any impact on the actual lovemaking.

[zro]

vashti, you may be right as i am only 22 so my personal experience is limited to that age range, but from what i have experienced and have seen from my older mates's experience, women are more materialistic and more vain than men, thats why they can be "played", when you are weaker in the head, it is easier to "manipulate" considering you have the right tools, this is not just "younger" girls, my older mates (25 and 26) last week convinced a 37 year old woman to let them tag team her, to be honest i was disgusted, her 18 year old daughter was right there as she walked out of the bar with them

[CAM]

lol i love to watch guys get defensive about the penis size thing lol. i don't know why. maybe because deep down and even superficially i could really give a ****. if a man is truly in love with a woman he doesn't care what her breasts look like. if a woman is truly in love with a man it doesn't matter what his penis size is. i guess the funny thing is is that guys seem to get a lot more defensive and insecure about it than women do.

btw i have had luck with the search, and i also enjoy my pedestal.

also, i would like to see details of this study about being self involved and all...

You misread me--I was referring to your shallow reference about penis size. I wasn't getting defensive.

The "self involved" article was in the Wall Street Journal Personal Section today (4/20)--just a newspaper article, but there's academic articles that support the same conclusions.

[vashti]

vashti, you may be right as i am only 22 so my personal experience is limited to that age range, but from what i have experienced and have seen from my older mates's experience, women are more materialistic and more vain than men, thats why they can be "played", when you are weaker in the head, it is easier to "manipulate" considering you have the right tools, this is not just "younger" girls, my older mates (25 and 26) last week convinced a 37 year old woman to let them tag team her, to be honest i was disgusted, her 18 year old daughter was right there as she walked out of the bar with them

Yes, that is rather disgusting, but I assure you not all of us are materialistic, vain, weak in the head, and easy to manipulate. It sounds like that woman was simply in competition with her own daughter.

Have you considered that maybe that is just the type of person your mates attract? As I said, I don't tend to attract such hideous people. Why do they?

[zro]

Yes, that is rather disgusting, but I assure you not all of us are materialistic, vain, weak in the head, and easy to manipulate. It sounds like that woman was simply in competition with her own daughter.

Have you considered that maybe that is just the type of person your mates attract? As I said, I don't tend to attract such hideous people. Why do they?

Well my mates are guys who just like to have a bit of fun and have sex, i think they just pick a target and then go to work on them, i would like to believe that most women are actually nice humans with a sense of self respect, but to be honest i have seen the nicest girl turn into a "slut" once she has a few drinks in her and go for the "man whores" instead of the nice guy, i know its unfair to judge a group of people by one or two specific incidents, but i have seen it happen too many times, its actually quite sad beacause i was raised in the middle east where i got taught to have a high respect and dignity for women, but over here in the west its hard to maintain a respect for a female who is offering you sex after 20 minutes of meeting her, my mates call me stupid for not taking advantage, but i just cant do it, have too much respect for myself to touch these kind of bitches

[vashti]

Well my mates are guys who just like to have a bit of fun and have sex, i think they just pick a target and then go to work on them, i would like to believe that most women are actually nice humans with a sense of self respect, but to be honest i have seen the nicest girl turn into a "slut" once she has a few drinks in her and go for the "man whores" instead of the nice guy, i know its unfair to judge a group of people by one or two specific incidents, but i have seen it happen too many times, its actually quite sad beacause i was raised in the middle east where i got taught to have a high respect and dignity for women, but over here in the west its hard to maintain a respect for a female who is offering you sex after 20 minutes of meeting her, my mates call me stupid for not taking advantage, but i just cant do it, have too much respect for myself to touch these kind of bitches

You are trying to meet nice girls in a bar? I don't think you will find one. Nice guys, either. I would hate to be judged based on your impressions of bar-fly women.

[zro]

its not just bars and clubs, even at universities and in general, women will be vain and choose men who have material things, the nice guy gets shunted in the "friend zone" and the man whores 9 times out of 10 will get the attention of the females, what bothers me is not the fact that women are vain and go for looks and material things, part of it is human nature..of course people attracted to good looks, but the fact that they lie and claim to want a guy with a "loving personality or a good heart", when in fact their actions show the complete opposite..at least guys are honest, looks DO matter if i am not attracted to someone, i dont give a **** about how good your personality is, there is never going to be anything sexual there, and to add insult to injury women will bypass looks if you have social status or material things eg hugh hephner and donald trump or my example of tupac earlier in the thread, at least guys dont swoop that low

[misombra]

'Sombra, I think what it comes down to is this: if I meet a girl I truly love, I could care less what size breasts she has or how great her ass is. None of that really matters. But what if her vagina wasn't good enough to get me off? I don't know... what if it was always dry and loose? That's the problem. Some guys feel as though maybe they aren't physically capable of satisfying a woman. Large breasts are just aesthetics, they don't have any impact on the actual lovemaking.

well now you're gonna make dry and loose vagina having people insecure. lol. at least we can use lube and do some exercises. what are small penised people gonna do? make up for it some other way maybe. i would hate to be in bed with a man who was uptight and insecure about his penis.

[vashti]

to add insult to injury women will bypass looks if you have social status or material things eg hugh hephner and donald trump or my example of tupac earlier in the thread, at least guys dont swoop that low

You must be kidding! Smart, average looking girls are overlooked all the time by boys that are more interested in hot but stupid girls. There is plenty of shallowness to go around. I think a lot of people outgrow it, though.