Our worlds have been broken..

[Daybreaker]

What do you define as fighting for you?

Doing as much as she can to break down the barrier with her parents and force them to put a little more weight and attention to her personal desires and happiness. We're not bad people. Our parents have souls.

[vashti]

You know, with her history of boyfriend-choosing, can you blame her parents for worrying? Her judgement sounds impaired.

It is true you know more about this from your own perspective. I am offering you the parental perspective. If you want to grow as a person, you might try seeing things from their point of view.

And I think "abnormally overprotective" is an oxymoron when you are talking about the parent of a daughter.

[Daybreaker]

You know, with her history of boyfriend-choosing, can you blame her parents for worrying? Her judgement sounds impaired.

It is true you know more about this from your own perspective. I am offering you the parental perspective. If you want to grow as a person, you might try seeing things from their point of view.

And I think "abnormally overprotective" is an oxymoron when you are talking about the parent of a daughter.

Her judgment, in my opinion, was incredibly impaired.
She's getting better, I hope, at least.

It affords me very little solace to think of things in their perspective, as I got an idea from her angry father. But I appreciate it very much.

And yeah, I suppose it's an oxymoron, but it's nothing like I've ever seen. Not even in any type of media or in my imagination. That's all I'm saying.

[Cain]

Her judgment, in my opinion, was incredibly impaired.
She's getting better, I hope, at least.

It affords me very little solace to think of things in their perspective, as I got an idea from her angry father. But I appreciate it very much.

And yeah, I suppose it's an oxymoron, but it's nothing like I've ever seen. Not even in any type of media or in my imagination. That's all I'm saying.

I can assure you that from what you've said, they aren't abnormally overprotective. Don't you understand that just like she'll be telling them that you're different and that you're amazing, it's what they've heard about her other bfs until they broke her heart. It's going to take years to convince them otherwise that you won't do the same.

[Daybreaker]

I can assure you that from what you've said, they aren't abnormally overprotective. Don't you understand that just like she'll be telling them that you're different and that you're amazing, it's what they've heard about her other bfs until they broke her heart. It's going to take years to convince them otherwise that you won't do the same.

Her father threatened to ruin my life and pull off counts of me being with a minor, as although it's not true "he can make it happen." He's a lawyer. You can't tell me what to and what not to understand because you have no idea what she's said about her other BFs.. she's very close with her parents and she tells them everything. She has told me everything about her previous relationships, I know her past, do you?

Her other relationships didn't last half as long. She says they're overreacting. Her father, upon meeting him for the first time, told me: I've been to prison and I'm not afraid to go back. He then set a gun down on the counter. He's a massive hot-head, have you ever dealt with a jerk father? I'm certain you have.

I think I have the right to dub that as overbearingly protective.
Do you need me to give you all these details or can you not take my word for it that they're protective?

Why is it that you're making it impossible for me to feel good about my decision?

I thought these were advice forums, and not the "every guy that posts is a plague-like, average, typical predator that I already know everything about" forums.

I may have gone over the line but I just wanted to get that off my back. I still thank you as you're constantly providing me with new perspectives.

[vashti]

Personally, I love her father. this is exactly the kind of man you want to father your daughters.

Anyway, be happy. My daughter will have to have boys fill out the following if they ever want to take her out (thanks to indi):





APPLICATION FOR PERMISSION TO DATE MY DAUGHTER

NOTE: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless
accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, lineage,
and current medical report from your doctor.

NAME_____________________________________ DATE OF BIRTH_____________

HEIGHT___________ WEIGHT____________ IQ__________ GPA_____________

SOCIAL SECURITY #_________________ DRIVERS LICENSE #________________

BOY SCOUT RANK AND BADGES____________________________________________

HOME ADDRESS_______________________ CITY/STATE___________ ZIP______

Do you have parents? ___Yes ___No
Is one male and the other female? ___Yes ___No
If No, explain:
__________________________________________________ ____________

Number of years they have been married ______________________________

If less than your age, explain
__________________________________________________ ____________

__________________________________________________ ____________


ACCESSORIES SECTION:

A. Do you own or have access to a van? __Yes __No

B. A truck with oversized tires? __Yes __No

C. A waterbed? __Yes __No

D. A pickup with a mattress in the back? __Yes __No

E. A tattoo? __Yes __No

F. Do you have an earring, nose ring, __Yes __No
pierced tongue, pierced cheek or a belly button ring?

(IF YOU ANSWERED "YES" TO ANY OF THE ABOVE, DISCONTINUE APPLICATION
AND LEAVE PREMISES IMMEDIATELY. I SUGGEST RUNNING.)


ESSAY SECTION:

In 50 words or less, what does "LATE" mean to you?

__________________________________________________ ____________

__________________________________________________ ____________

In 50 words or less, what does "DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER" mean to you?

__________________________________________________ ____________

__________________________________________________ ____________

In 50 words or less, what does "ABSTINENCE" mean to you?

__________________________________________________ ____________

__________________________________________________ ____________


REFERENCES SECTION:

Church you attend __________________________________________________ _

How often you attend ________________________________________________

When would be the best time to interview your:

father? _____________

mother? _____________

pastor? _____________


SHORT-ANSWER SECTION:

Answer by filling in the blank. Please answer freely, all answers
are confidential.

A: If I were shot, the last place I would want shot would be:

__________________________________________________ ____________

B: If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is my:

__________________________________________________ ____________

C: A woman's place is in the:

__________________________________________________ ____________

D: The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is:

__________________________________________________ ____________

E. What do you want to do IF you grow up? ___________________________

__________________________________________________ ____________

__________________________________________________ ____________

F. When I meet a girl, the thing I always notice about her first is:

__________________________________________________ ____________

F. What is the current going rate of a hotel room? __________________

I SWEAR THAT ALL INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TO
THE BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT,
NATIVE AMERICAN ANT TORTURE, CRUCIFIXION, ELECTROCUTION, CHINESE
WATER TORTURE, RED HOT POKERS, AND HILLARY CLINTON KISS TORTURE.


__________________________________________________ _______
Applicant's Signature (that means sign your name, moron!)


_______________________________ ________________________________
Mother's Signature Father's Signature

_______________________________ ________________________________
Pastor/Priest/Rabbi State Representative/Congressman

Thank you for your interest, and it had better be genuine and
non-sexual. Please allow four to six years for processing.

You will be contacted in writing if you are approved. Please do
not try to call or write (since you probably can't, and it would
cause you injury). If your application is rejected, you will be
notified by two gentleman wearing white ties carrying violin cases.
(you might want to watch your back)

[Daybreaker]

Personally, I love her father. this is exactly the kind of man you want to father your daughters.

Anyway, be happy. My daughter will have to have boys fill out the following if they ever want to take her out (thanks to indi)

This thread isn't about how you like rubbing your love for her father in my face. Are you aware that a comment like that is offensive to someone in my situation? I can completely understand why you would say that, but I am involved in a specific way that doesn't allow me to appreciate a comment like that.

Unless you're being facetious, you seem like the type of parent that ends up on Dr. Phil, caught babying your 21 year old son/daughter, unable to understand that your role in your child's life transitions, not your importance.

But this isn't about her dad. This is about coping. Coping with the fact that everyone involved thinks her parents are overreacting, and there's not a damned thing anyone can do about it. You probably like that mighty parental feeling, though.

Well, have a soul. Put yourself in my shoes, it must be hard to do.

EDIT:
Btw, I lol'd at the application.

[lesa]

My apologies as I have not read the other posts...but this was the parent's home, correct? I don't care what my significant others tells me is okay I am not stripping, sexing, or anything like that in my SO parent's home...I had a SO who spent time in my mother's home.....I was a puritan for that whole time together...and I spent time in his mother’s home and I was a puritan again for that whole time. This was a fiancé and I still would not do anything like that in a parent's home even when he would always make advances toward me...no.

I can guess the embarrassment I would have for that kind of action and I am not willing to risk it...plus they almost always have a reason to knock. Oh, I should mention that I was in my mid 20's and he was in his late 20's to early 30's at the time.

It’s a major lesson in houseguest etiquettes….that you will probably never forget.

[vashti]

Daybreaker only wants to hear about what a victim he is, lesa, and how evil her parents are.

[Daybreaker]

Daybreaker only wants to hear about what a victim he is, lesa, and how evil her parents are.

No, you just seem to be stuck on how evil guys my age are.

I loathe self-victimization and that's not what I'm asking to advance.

Sweet Jesus, why are you on the offensive now?
Like I said, put yourself in my shoes.
You've only given me one side of this (the parents') and I expressed a bit of frustration because that's the only thing I've been exposed to as of yet.

Empathy is mind-opening.

Regardless of what I've done to disrespect her parents and what they've said/done to me, I still have loads of respect for them because they care so much about their daughter.
And while I was on their good side, they treated me with so much respect. I felt very honored, and I still do.
I'm not a victim. I'm in a situation of bad luck.
I'm just not willing to walk away from this right now, or any time in the near future, unless something more drastic happens.

[vashti]

I do feel bad for you. It is hard to not feel like you are trusted.

But I still ultimately empathize with her parents. Sorry.

[lesa]

After noticing that there are over 35 posts in one day, I figure I should read a little more about this situation.

I have to agree with one of the posters about the couch incident. It may not appear intimate to you but you are displaying an extremely relaxed attitude in her parent’s home. I was always sitting up straight when my SO was around--in my own mother’s home. She had no problems with him at all and although she is somewhat conservative…she loved him! He ALWAYS entered my mother’s home like a gentleman. First he would hug her (something I don’t even do, lol). Then he would sit in the living area until I arrived. He NEVER hugged me, or kissed me, or placed his foot on the coffee table, etc. He practically appeared like he was a business partner of mine rather than an intimate partner. I don’t know the psychology of this presentation and I do not think he really had a plan to act that way but my family loved him for it. My brother would have punched him out if he did not act the way he did but because he did act like a complete gentleman (I never ever had to open any doors for myself), he was a winner.

Sometimes parents may try to find a reason to not like a person but when you give them no reason they can only eventually begin to like you. I was quite conservative at his mother’s house but I think it really surprised her from a female point of view, but I was loved there too. I even got to spend nights in his childhood bedroom!

This is you gf parents’ home…don’t do ANY PDA in front of them or in their home and most likely their curiosity of you will become love for you, and not hate. How can they not like a complete gentlemen? Your gf needs to drop the issue because she will make it bigger than it is. Let it go and start over with her. Of course now you have to regain that gentleman feeling about you in her parents but you can spend time with her at the university and in your apartment/dorm…as you two are adults. Have you two appear as serious adults to the parent…not as teenagers. They will respect your relationship. They will come around later but don’t make a fuss now or ever.

Also, don’t try to rationalize the father’s behavior. Understand that the father will always want to protect his daughter, and he may only see her as a little child but as long as you avoid public display of affection or relaxation in front of him at all times he will find that you are a great person. You two are adults and can otherwise do whatever, but give the parents that sense of control in their home and in front of them…even when you are 40 years old.

[Daybreaker]

After noticing that there are over 35 posts in one day, I figure I should read a little more about this situation.

I have to agree with one of the posters about the couch incident. It may not appear intimate to you but you are displaying an extremely relaxed attitude in her parent’s home. I was always sitting up straight when my SO was around--in my own mother’s home. She had no problems with him at all and although she is somewhat conservative…she loved him! He ALWAYS entered my mother’s home like a gentleman. First he would hug her (something I don’t even do, lol). Then he would sit in the living area until I arrived. He NEVER hugged me, or kissed me, or placed his foot on the coffee table, etc. He practically appeared like he was a business partner of mine rather than an intimate partner. I don’t know the psychology of this presentation and I do not think he really had a plan to act that way but my family loved him for it. My brother would have punched him out if he did not act the way he did but because he did act like a complete gentleman (I never ever had to open any doors for myself), he was a winner.

Sometimes parents may try to find a reason to not like a person but when you give them no reason they can only eventually begin to like you. I was quite conservative at his mother’s house but I think it really surprised her from a female point of view, but I was loved there too. I even got to spend nights in his childhood bedroom!

This is you gf parents’ home…don’t do ANY PDA in front of them or in their home and most likely their curiosity of you will become love for you, and not hate. How can they not like a complete gentlemen? Your gf needs to drop the issue because she will make it bigger than it is. Let it go and start over with her. Of course now you have to regain that gentleman feeling about you in her parents but you can spend time with her at the university and in your apartment/dorm…as you two are adults. Have you two appear as serious adults to the parent…not as teenagers. They will respect your relationship. They will come around later but don’t make a fuss now or ever.

Also, don’t try to rationalize the father’s behavior. Understand that the father will always want to protect his daughter, and he may only see her as a little child but as long as you avoid public display of affection or relaxation in front of him at all times he will find that you are a great person. You two are adults and can otherwise do whatever, but give the parents that sense of control in their home and in front of them…even when you are 40 years old.

Your post made me cry of happiness.
That is beautiful.

Thank you for understanding my position.

The thing about the couch is that I would always prefer to stand, off to the side, quiet and firm. But they would always invite me to take a seat as they can be a relaxed family.

Her father would always tell me to loosen up and have a seat, sometimes I politely insisted that I stood and sometimes I kicked back and had a sit. I've gone through many screening conversations with them and I've always tried to be as gentlemanly as possible. It seems it's rather difficult to give you an idea of what type of person I am because I didn't come out telling you how I normally act. Thank you for your post as it's inspiring, encouraging, and makes me feel better about this whole situation.

[Cain]

Firstly, don't get offended when I make a comment. If you want to avoid people making certain comments, be more descriptive. You make it seem like she's never lied to you or her parents. People don't always tell everyone everything.

Secondly, do you really think her dad is going to kill you so that he can go to jail and not be able to protect his daughter from others? He went to jail, but did you ever stop to think about how long ago that might have been or what it was for? I can assure you it most likely wasn't a serious felony, because if it was he most likely would have been disbarred. Her father was using a scare tactic in order to get you to remember who the boss is and who you have to answer to if you break her heart. If you're the good guy and all her other ex's were assholes, why would he want to kill you when he could have killed them?

I know that it sucks. You want to be with her, but her parents are an obstacle right now. If she is really ready to stand up to her parents regarding your love for each other, she shouldn't let them come between you. She shouldn't make you wait two years until she moves out. But if she is dependent on them for now, don't be surprised if she does. I'll be honest, if my mother didn't like my gf and told me that I'd have to move out and that she wouldn't help me unless I broke up with her, I'd move out. There would be no one standing in my way of being with my gf.

[vashti]

Her father would always tell me to loosen up and have a seat, sometimes I politely insisted that I stood and sometimes I kicked back and had a sit.

Having a seat and laying on the couch aren't really the same thing, though. Anyway, when he says to loosen up, he doesn't really mean it. He wants you to be a little bit scared of pissing him off.