To what extent do you think about former partners?

[and_for_what]

To all you more experienced people who have had more than one serious boyfriend/girlfriend... maybe even ex-husbands or wives... I'm interested to know how they feature in your thoughts today, and how you look back on those times.
Surely everyone sometimes wonders "what if..." - so I'll ask how prominent a thought that is in your mind, if you let it be.


Do you see your previous failed relationships as having been essential stepping stones leading to your current, happy state?

Just anything that comes to mind

(the nature of the relationship(s) and the breakup will of course affect your answers, so a brief description of such things would go well with whatever else you say)

thanks a lot

[Illusional]

there are reasons why past relationships didn't last and you mustn't forget them. usually after some times has past after a break up, most people only remember the good memories and always wonder how things might have turned out.

i say, leave the past in the past.

raverboy

[Cain]

I remember my last serious relationship and I'm thankful for that. It's definitely changed my outlook on relationships and how I approach them in the future.

[Charlie Boy II]

all my serious girlfriends have been great girls. I don't think about them much but when I do it's always with a sense of fondness and gratitude.

[Aeradalia]

I look back at my past relationships and see all the mistakes I had made... as well as some of the good things too. However, they failed for a reason, and I must never forget that reason.

[Charlie Boy II]

I hate that term "failed relationships". Relationships are temporary by nature. Just because a relationship ends, it doesn't mean it's "failed".

[vashti]

I never think about them unless I am asked.

[IndiReloaded]

all my serious girlfriends have been great girls. I don't think about them much but when I do it's always with a sense of fondness and gratitude.

I never had a bad breakup either. I feel the same way. My old BFs were exactly what we each needed at the time.

[Charlie Boy II]

yes, but what they think about me is another matter, I suspect.

[Lipp]

Maybe its a sort of "those who forget their history are doomed to repeat it" kind of thing.

[Illusional]

I never think about them unless I am asked.

so what memories do you keep of me?

raverboy

[Gigabitch]

I have no time to think about exes, since all of my imagination is taken up with fantasies about Illusional.

But seriously, I have no rancor for exes, nor to they get a lot of my attention. If there are any bad feelings remaining, I usually assign them to my own bad judgment for staying too long or not seeing the writing on the wall.

I don't miss any of them.

[Gribble]

Sometimes I think about them when I jerk off. That's about the extent.

[and_for_what]

Thanks for the replies. Let me clarify that I mean also what do you think about them now, if asked (and I just asked). How do you see them, looking back and considering them (you, them and the relationship)? To borrow a term from somewhere - using your retrospectroscope what do you see?

Giga's answer is an example of an interesting one - that what bad memories remain she can attribute to her own shortcomings at the time.

[Illusional]

I have no time to think about exes, since all of my imagination is taken up with fantasies about Illusional.

shall i make all of your dream reality??

raverboy