The ex-girlfiend problem....

[nadine1986]

We've known each other for about 12 months but at the beginnig it was only "Hi". I liked him and wanted to know better, so as we had some lessons together we started to talk a little. Sometimes went back home together ( he even gave me a lift once... ) I wasn't sure if he was really interested in me ( he didn't ask me out or something ) but there were some signs like eye contact, asking many questions about me and so on... I almost gave up hope becouse there was nothing more and lately he's changed his behaviour...He tried to spend some time with me and my friends ( didn't do it before) ask if I go or not etc. Finaly there was a weekend trip and he asked me to go...I wasn't sure if I should go becouse it was something like " men-trip" but finaly he persuaded me...but than well he's changed his behaviour once again...We've talked and he told me that he wasn't ready to start anything new, becouse of his past realtionship ( they broke up 2 years ago and it was his fault, the don't contact each other) He finds me atractive and pretty and so on but he doesn't know if he could forget...What should I do now...why did he want me to go there? what does his behaviour mean ( he sometimes acts very strange like he was jealous or something, asks if I'm seeing someone etc why?) I really don't know what to do...

[Yggdrasil]

I'd ask him why his previous relation was broken up and since it's 'his fault' what he has done to remedy that?

I guess right now: nothing. And that's probably why he doesn't want to go into another relation.

[nadine1986]

Yeah I asked him about it and he told me..it's complicated...he cheated on her and than confessed her the truth, she forgave him but he couldn't face the fact he did it and left her. After some time he changed his mind but she didn't want him back... I don't know what to think of that situation...he told me I attract him and he can't resist it because he is just a man.. I think there may be something more than physical attraction... but he doesn't want to admit it and he is afraid of starting new relation without beeing sure he is totally fair...He likes to spend time with me I think and told me he could tell me everything...

[Yggdrasil]

I hate to tell you this but there is this saying: once a cheater, always a cheater.

I dunno but... I'd create a lot of distance between him an me.

[utopianhercules]

I concur with yggdrasil -- once a cheater, always a cheater. He is stupid, wussy and unclear.

He does like you and all those endless questions do mean that he is interested. But then, is he really the guy you want?

No man is worth it if he can't come out and communicate openly and clearly. Men are supposed to do that, although it won't hurt if a woman does that.

He should call you; ask you out and spend good time with you. Prove himself that he has changed and that he is really committed to you. I don't think he is going to do this, anyway.

No matter what, I wouldn't want to be a guy who got ditched because he was cheating on his girlfriend then.

When he finds the next marginally prettier girl than you, he will scoot off behind her and will you come back here to post about it?

[whaywardj]

Go on seeing the guy, but keep your own council around any romantic impulses that might originate from him or you. You gotta spend some time with a person just being acquaintances, then maybe friends, before you can really have any clear ideas on what to do about the romance beast. I'd keep the intimate touching (say, kissing) to a minimum, too, for awhile.

[Yggdrasil]

Oh BTW: beware of STD's.

[spacecow]

He just wants in your pants!

[damn2008]

Guy needs to grow some balls...get over his ex-...get over himself and just figure himself out before he moves on.

Just be careful and keep the guard up. If he isn't ready to move on, you'll know it...so don't get too attached or you could wind up getting hurt.