How can I be attractive ?

[MrNiceGuy]

You should be banned from having an opinion. I suggest some sort of jaw clenching device that prevents stupid women from speaking.

I said it in my post retard, I said that women don't just want someone attractive they go above and beyond that in terms of their requirements. I really don't want to be rude but you force be to be a complete cunt so I can get some real advice during hoping that idiots like youj will go away and stop posting nonsense advice due your inability (as a woman I might add) to process very simple ****ing logic.

If you cannot understand :
{
Me = semi attractive man
Me= want attractive woman
Semi attractive woman = want very attractive man

Woman waits her turn for very attractive man, leaving semi attractive man single.
}
Then you should go back to watching opera and have your head filled with continuous nonsense while you live in your derragned little fantasy land.

I am a man who is perdiodically in a noticeable degree of pain and I do not need your shit.

ROTFLMAO!

Good one. Some of these women on here are crazy!

Feminism has destroyed the world.

I remember when girls were girls and didn't have all these control issues they have today.

But I am meeting more and more who are giving up on (or never fully picked up on) the whole feminism movement and dropping it like a bad habit. They want to stay at home an raise kids instead of working full time.

Which is a good thing. The death of the family and the societal issolation caused by women going out into the workplace has created all sorts of problems in our society.

Women today seem alone and unable to cope. They NEED men. They just need to be reminded.

[Sonrisa]

ROTFLMAO!

Good one. Some of these women on here are crazy!

Feminism has destroyed the world.

I remember when girls were girls and didn't have all these control issues they have today.

But I am meeting more and more who are giving up on (or never fully picked up on) the whole feminism movement and dropping it like a bad habit. They want to stay at home an raise kids instead of working full time.

Which is a good thing. The death of the family and the societal issolation caused by women going out into the workplace has created all sorts of problems in our society.

Women today seem alone and unable to cope. They NEED men. They just need to be reminded.

yeah, i remember when women stayed home and the husbands treated them like crap along with beating the living shit out of them....now those were the days....

anyone missing it?

[Raze]

yeah, i remember when women stayed home and the husbands treated them like crap along with beating the living shit out of them....now those were the days....

anyone missing it?

Sonrisa, that still happens. The depressing part is some women actually like being treated like dogs. Not all, but some.

[Sonrisa]

how old are you Raze?

[Raze]

For your reading pleasure, Sonrisa.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Reports of abusive husbands, who beat and even kill their wives, gather lots of publicity and create huge outcries, as they should. For example, there are two recent reports from Buffalo, New York and Mississauga, Ontario, Canada. I hope these guys and any others who do such heinous things to other people, including wives, get put away forever.

But there's an even more prevalent bullying strategy that husbands use to control wives, that tends to get overlooked because it's not as violent. These are husbands who abuse and control their wives by sneaky, covert, manipulative tactics that demean the women and keep them subservient. I call these controlling husbands, "stealth bullies."

Even though overt, physical, domestic violence isn't involved in these cases, women need name the emotional abuse and violence, harassment and domination as "bullying" in order to rally their spirits, strengthen their backbones and get the help they need to stop the abuse or to get away.

Of course, the sooner women recognize and label what's going on (especially before they have children); the easier they'll be able to get away.

Here are some of the warning signs of stealthy, controlling husbands.


They control everything - what you do, where you go, who spends the money and what it's spent on. They may say that they work hard and make the money, so they should have control of it.
Their make the rules - your "no" isn't accepted as "no." They're always right and you're always wrong; their sense of humor is right and they're not abusing you, you're too sensitive. Your concerns generally don't get dealt with - theirs are more important, so they can ignore your wishes.
They control you with their disapproval, name-calling, putdowns, demeaning, blame and guilt - no matter what you do; you're wrong or not good enough. You're told that if you were perfect, you'd be treated better. They blow up over minor things or if you resist in any way. You're to blame if they hurt you. Or they control you with their hyper-sensitive, hurt feelings, whining and threats to commit suicide.
They argue endlessly and withhold approval and love if you don't do exactly what they want. You feel emotionally blackmailed, intimidated and drained. You walk on eggshells; they threaten you, the children, the pets, your favorite things.
You're told you're incompetent, helpless and would be alone without them. They stimulate your self-questioning and self-doubt.
They isolate you - they won't allow you to see your friends or your family, go to school or even work.
You're told that a woman's place is to be treated like they treat you. You should accept whatever they dish out. They often get their friends and even your family of origin to agree with them. You have to tolerate their behavior until you can convince them to change.

Of course, the same type of list applies to abusive, controlling, stealth-bullying wives, partners, coworkers, bosses, boyfriends, girlfriends, teenagers and friends.

Many women allow themselves to be bullied repeatedly because they don't recognize and label the control and abuse as "bullying." When you recognize and label these bullies' tactics and tricks, you'll be empowered to resist them. When you learn effective skills and techniques, you can resist them successfully.

Peaceful methods (understanding, tolerating, logic, reasoning, forgiveness, their sympathetic therapy) sometimes stop mild bullying. But you need firmer, stronger methods to stop relentless, determined husbands.

Of course it's usually not easy to stop the behavior or to get away. There's no one-size-fits-all answer. Tactics must be designed for each situation. Factors such as money, children, outside support, age, health, threatened increase in abuse to physical brutality and murder, and family of origin and cultural values can be extremely important in designing effective tactics.

But the first step is always for women to make an internal shift from acceptance or tolerance (even though you may hate them) to a commitment and determination to end the abuse and bullying, no matter what it takes. Without that inner commitment, women usually end up begging the husband to change and waiting forever. The inner commitment is necessary to give strength and power to the right tactics in your hands.

Resources cited:

[url]http://buffalonews.com/home/story/593547.html[/url]
[url]http://mississauga.com/article/24694[/url]

Ben Leichtling, Ph.D. is author of the books and CDs "How to Stop Bullies in Their Tracks," "Parenting Bully-Proof Kids" and "Eliminate the High cost of Low Attitudes." He is available for coaching, consulting and speaking. To find practical, real-world tactics to stop bullies and bullying at home, school, work and in relationships, see his web site ([url]http://BulliesBeGone.com[/url]) and blog ([url]http://BulliesBeGoneBlog.com[/url]).
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
In thousands of homes across Canada and the United States the family can be a crucible for seething violence. Women are beaten daily and innocent children are victims of brutal assaults. There is another form of violence that exists, has been largely ignored and even laughed at. Men are also victims of domestic violence.

Statistics show that men are sometimes the victim of physical and emotional abuse at the hands of their partners or spouses. Martin Fiebert, Ph.D. investigated physical aggression by women on their male partner. 285 women from 978 women polled, stated they were physically aggressive toward their male partner. He also found that women in their twenties were significantly more likely to be aggressive than women in their thirties and above.

Advocacy
Numerous studies have been conducted that validate some women are physically and emotionally aggressive in relationships. There have been public conferences about this issue and Senator Anne C Cools (of Canada) has been instrumental in helping to get these issues into the public forum.

Men rarely come forward to share their experiences, as they fear it is a loss of their manhood and they fear being labeled “a wimp”. There is now clinical literature (Williams & Myer 92) that states men are reluctant to seek help, as they fear being stigmatized. Seeking help, regardless of gender takes a wealth of strength and courage regardless of whether the victim is male or female.

Women Can Be Violent Too
Many of today’s women know of an uncle, father, brother or cousin who has been the victim of domestic violence. Women have in fact sought services for their loved ones as they can not believe what women can get away with in today’s society. They have found in their search is the attitude that if men are abused, it’s only in self-defense. In the late 1990’s there was a public debate in Toronto, “When She Hurts Him”. During this debate, Judy Rebick (former president of the National Action Committee on the Status of Women of Canada) said that if a man hits his wife it is in self-defense.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Years of domestic abuse ended in a suicide on Friday when an Alberttown man who had promised to change his ways turned himself over to police and ingested poison while at the station. He died at the public hospital shortly after.

Clarence Blair, 40, of 67 Fifth Street, Alberttown ingested two bottles of a poisonous substance on Friday- the first on his way to the Alberttown Police Station and the other while there.

Police rushed Blair to the hospital after realizing what he had done, but doctors were unable to save him. Blair was frothing at the mouth after he drank the second bottle.


Clarence Blair
Relatives are saying that stress pushed him to commit the act since according to one relative, “he had a lot of problems”.

Alexis Blair, his wife, told Stabroek News yesterday that her husband was abusive and that he had stepped up his attacks on her in the days leading up to him taking his own life.

She recalled that on Tuesday last he dealt her a severe beating during an argument. She chose to forgive him.

Blair said that she had made prior reports at Alberttown Police Station for her husband, and on Thursday morning she was forced to make another one. She related that on Thursday the man dealt her another severe beating, so severe that she had to be rushed to the hospital.

The woman’s head was bandaged as she spoke and she showed recent physical scars and others that were there from over the years. She fought back tears explaining that after 21 years of marriage she was willing to “forgive and forget”.

The police advised her on Thursday to report any sighting of her husband. Alexis Blair said that he showed up at her work place on Friday morning and immediately fled the premises.

She recalled alerting two constables in the area who accompanied her back to the work site and managed to apprehend her husband.

She said her husband slipped away from the constables shortly after they apprehended him and later showed up at their Alberttown home making threats.

“He tell how I gon punish and he gon beat me and beat me in front of de police,” she related. She said that she did not respond.

Clarence Blair already had the substance on him when he showed up at home. An older brother upbraided him about his behaviour and urged him to go to station.

He decided to turn himself in to the police and told relatives that he would change.

He then asked his eldest daughter to accompany him to the station and subsequently left home.

This was around 2 pm on Friday. The girl saw him drinking something from a bottle but had no idea what it was at the time.

Alexis Blair lamented last night that she had lost her husband. She said that they had many fights, but that “things would work out.

“I can’t bear it,” she said struggling with her emotions.

The couple has seven children, the youngest being five months old. Clarence Blair was employed as security guard at Kalibur Security Services.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My age is not important nor does it have anything to do with this topic.

[catheuphoria]

Hello there, I'm new here

Need advices, cuz I couldn't deal with these things. I consider myself as a not-so-boring typical of girl. But I don't know why I couldn't start any conversation with people, what should I do? Am I a little anti-social? Boys love girls who can talk about anything, but I just stay silent everytime both boys-i-do-know or strangers come
and thats what makes me so difficult to make friends, especially from another countries!

[ecojeanne]

age is no measure of ones ability to make sense of the world around them, you should know that sonrisa, oops, maybe in your 'wise' old age you still haven't caught on, some old people are like that, stuck in a time warp thinking they know more while the world passes them by

[NeoSeminole]

- dress nicely
- wear cologne
- exercise regularly
- get a tan
- smile more

I can't give you more advice without seeing what you look like.

[NeoSeminole]

ecojeanne says:

"age is no measure of sensibilities, you should know that sonrisa, oops, maybe in your 'wise' old age you still haven't caught on, some old people are like that, stuck in a time warp thinking they know more"

I raff when people think age = wisdom.

[Only-virgins]

- dress nicely
- wear cologne
- exercise regularly
- get a tan
- smile more

Can't go wrong with those idea. Add eye contact and it is all good.

[Raze]

Make sure you brush your teeth and have gum available in case of emergency. No one likes stinky breath.

[Sonrisa]

For your reading pleasure, Sonrisa.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Reports of abusive husbands, who beat and even kill their wives, gather lots of publicity and create huge outcries, as they should. For example, there are two recent reports from Buffalo, New York and Mississauga, Ontario, Canada. I hope these guys and any others who do such heinous things to other people, including wives, get put away forever.

But there's an even more prevalent bullying strategy that husbands use to control wives, that tends to get overlooked because it's not as violent. These are husbands who abuse and control their wives by sneaky, covert, manipulative tactics that demean the women and keep them subservient. I call these controlling husbands, "stealth bullies."

Even though overt, physical, domestic violence isn't involved in these cases, women need name the emotional abuse and violence, harassment and domination as "bullying" in order to rally their spirits, strengthen their backbones and get the help they need to stop the abuse or to get away.

Of course, the sooner women recognize and label what's going on (especially before they have children); the easier they'll be able to get away.

Here are some of the warning signs of stealthy, controlling husbands.


They control everything - what you do, where you go, who spends the money and what it's spent on. They may say that they work hard and make the money, so they should have control of it.
Their make the rules - your "no" isn't accepted as "no." They're always right and you're always wrong; their sense of humor is right and they're not abusing you, you're too sensitive. Your concerns generally don't get dealt with - theirs are more important, so they can ignore your wishes.
They control you with their disapproval, name-calling, putdowns, demeaning, blame and guilt - no matter what you do; you're wrong or not good enough. You're told that if you were perfect, you'd be treated better. They blow up over minor things or if you resist in any way. You're to blame if they hurt you. Or they control you with their hyper-sensitive, hurt feelings, whining and threats to commit suicide.
They argue endlessly and withhold approval and love if you don't do exactly what they want. You feel emotionally blackmailed, intimidated and drained. You walk on eggshells; they threaten you, the children, the pets, your favorite things.
You're told you're incompetent, helpless and would be alone without them. They stimulate your self-questioning and self-doubt.
They isolate you - they won't allow you to see your friends or your family, go to school or even work.
You're told that a woman's place is to be treated like they treat you. You should accept whatever they dish out. They often get their friends and even your family of origin to agree with them. You have to tolerate their behavior until you can convince them to change.

Of course, the same type of list applies to abusive, controlling, stealth-bullying wives, partners, coworkers, bosses, boyfriends, girlfriends, teenagers and friends.

Many women allow themselves to be bullied repeatedly because they don't recognize and label the control and abuse as "bullying." When you recognize and label these bullies' tactics and tricks, you'll be empowered to resist them. When you learn effective skills and techniques, you can resist them successfully.

Peaceful methods (understanding, tolerating, logic, reasoning, forgiveness, their sympathetic therapy) sometimes stop mild bullying. But you need firmer, stronger methods to stop relentless, determined husbands.

Of course it's usually not easy to stop the behavior or to get away. There's no one-size-fits-all answer. Tactics must be designed for each situation. Factors such as money, children, outside support, age, health, threatened increase in abuse to physical brutality and murder, and family of origin and cultural values can be extremely important in designing effective tactics.

But the first step is always for women to make an internal shift from acceptance or tolerance (even though you may hate them) to a commitment and determination to end the abuse and bullying, no matter what it takes. Without that inner commitment, women usually end up begging the husband to change and waiting forever. The inner commitment is necessary to give strength and power to the right tactics in your hands.

Resources cited:

[url]http://buffalonews.com/home/story/593547.html[/url]
[url]http://mississauga.com/article/24694[/url]

Ben Leichtling, Ph.D. is author of the books and CDs "How to Stop Bullies in Their Tracks," "Parenting Bully-Proof Kids" and "Eliminate the High cost of Low Attitudes." He is available for coaching, consulting and speaking. To find practical, real-world tactics to stop bullies and bullying at home, school, work and in relationships, see his web site ([url]http://BulliesBeGone.com[/url]) and blog ([url]http://BulliesBeGoneBlog.com[/url]).
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
In thousands of homes across Canada and the United States the family can be a crucible for seething violence. Women are beaten daily and innocent children are victims of brutal assaults. There is another form of violence that exists, has been largely ignored and even laughed at. Men are also victims of domestic violence.

Statistics show that men are sometimes the victim of physical and emotional abuse at the hands of their partners or spouses. Martin Fiebert, Ph.D. investigated physical aggression by women on their male partner. 285 women from 978 women polled, stated they were physically aggressive toward their male partner. He also found that women in their twenties were significantly more likely to be aggressive than women in their thirties and above.

Advocacy
Numerous studies have been conducted that validate some women are physically and emotionally aggressive in relationships. There have been public conferences about this issue and Senator Anne C Cools (of Canada) has been instrumental in helping to get these issues into the public forum.

Men rarely come forward to share their experiences, as they fear it is a loss of their manhood and they fear being labeled “a wimp”. There is now clinical literature (Williams & Myer 92) that states men are reluctant to seek help, as they fear being stigmatized. Seeking help, regardless of gender takes a wealth of strength and courage regardless of whether the victim is male or female.

Women Can Be Violent Too
Many of today’s women know of an uncle, father, brother or cousin who has been the victim of domestic violence. Women have in fact sought services for their loved ones as they can not believe what women can get away with in today’s society. They have found in their search is the attitude that if men are abused, it’s only in self-defense. In the late 1990’s there was a public debate in Toronto, “When She Hurts Him”. During this debate, Judy Rebick (former president of the National Action Committee on the Status of Women of Canada) said that if a man hits his wife it is in self-defense.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Years of domestic abuse ended in a suicide on Friday when an Alberttown man who had promised to change his ways turned himself over to police and ingested poison while at the station. He died at the public hospital shortly after.

Clarence Blair, 40, of 67 Fifth Street, Alberttown ingested two bottles of a poisonous substance on Friday- the first on his way to the Alberttown Police Station and the other while there.

Police rushed Blair to the hospital after realizing what he had done, but doctors were unable to save him. Blair was frothing at the mouth after he drank the second bottle.


Clarence Blair
Relatives are saying that stress pushed him to commit the act since according to one relative, “he had a lot of problems”.

Alexis Blair, his wife, told Stabroek News yesterday that her husband was abusive and that he had stepped up his attacks on her in the days leading up to him taking his own life.

She recalled that on Tuesday last he dealt her a severe beating during an argument. She chose to forgive him.

Blair said that she had made prior reports at Alberttown Police Station for her husband, and on Thursday morning she was forced to make another one. She related that on Thursday the man dealt her another severe beating, so severe that she had to be rushed to the hospital.

The woman’s head was bandaged as she spoke and she showed recent physical scars and others that were there from over the years. She fought back tears explaining that after 21 years of marriage she was willing to “forgive and forget”.

The police advised her on Thursday to report any sighting of her husband. Alexis Blair said that he showed up at her work place on Friday morning and immediately fled the premises.

She recalled alerting two constables in the area who accompanied her back to the work site and managed to apprehend her husband.

She said her husband slipped away from the constables shortly after they apprehended him and later showed up at their Alberttown home making threats.

“He tell how I gon punish and he gon beat me and beat me in front of de police,” she related. She said that she did not respond.

Clarence Blair already had the substance on him when he showed up at home. An older brother upbraided him about his behaviour and urged him to go to station.

He decided to turn himself in to the police and told relatives that he would change.

He then asked his eldest daughter to accompany him to the station and subsequently left home.

This was around 2 pm on Friday. The girl saw him drinking something from a bottle but had no idea what it was at the time.

Alexis Blair lamented last night that she had lost her husband. She said that they had many fights, but that “things would work out.

“I can’t bear it,” she said struggling with her emotions.

The couple has seven children, the youngest being five months old. Clarence Blair was employed as security guard at Kalibur Security Services.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My age is not important nor does it have anything to do with this topic.

what's the point of those articles?

[Raze]

To make my point that abusive relationships are still prevalent.

[Sonrisa]

To make my point that abusive relationships are still prevalent.

prevalent to what?

[IndiReloaded]

You didn't need that uber post to make your point, Raze. Who would disagree?

Still, there were some good tips in there despite being off topic.

George, listen to Neo and OV, they made excellent suggestions.