Unreliable Men

**KandiJ** · 07-09-09, 07:51 PM

Are all men unreliable?

My boyfriend drives me mad saying he will do something and 3 weeks later its still not done. Then if i have to keep bringing it up i get accused of moaning, i cant win.

The most recent being ..... my car was parked in a car park with 1.5 hours free parking. I was busy so he offered to move it for me so that i wouldnt get a parking ticket. I had a feeling he wouldnt move it on time, so i said to him "well if i get a ticket, you can pay it"

Today i get one in the post, no surprise there.

Then i get "well i wont move it again for you" and he twists it all so its my fault.

If it was me and i told him id move his car on time, i would do it. Why cant he just do what he says he is going to do?

He is constantly letting me down. Should i just do everything myself even when he offers?

Thanks!

**miSSleepy** · 07-09-09, 07:58 PM

Yeh my bf is the same... I've stopped relying on him for the most part

**Wallace Stevens** · 07-09-09, 10:28 PM

NO, many men are reliable. I don't mean to impugn the status of your relationship, but I would try to move on. This man sounds like a bad apple.

**Cain** · 07-09-09, 10:36 PM

Why would you want to be with someone you can't rely on?

**misombra** · 07-09-09, 10:47 PM

you're responsible for your own car! pay your own damn tickets! it's not his fault your time went over. i wouldn't blame him for never offering again.

**Cain** · 07-09-09, 10:55 PM

Originally Posted by misombra

you're responsible for your own car! pay your own damn tickets! it's not his fault your time went over. i wouldn't blame him for never offering again.

I think it's more that he said he would do it and then didn't.

If I'm counting on someone to do something and they don't do it... repeatedly... the relationship is going to end. They can count on me, so why can't I count on them?

**misombra** · 07-09-09, 11:04 PM

if i offered to do something for somebody and they told me, "well then your responsible if it doesn't turn out right" i would want to not do it just on principle. and hell if i would pay that ticket HA!

if you want somebody reliable get yourself a servant.

**Wallace Stevens** · 07-09-09, 11:07 PM

Originally Posted by misombra

if i offered to do something for somebody and they told me, "well then your responsible if it doesn't turn out right" i would want to not do it just on principle. and hell if i would pay that ticket HA!

if you want somebody reliable get yourself a servant.

I think this evades the point somewhat. Relationships are built on trust and mutual support. Couples should be eager to help and support each other. You want to be there, in many ways, for your SO. In contrast, this man sounds selfish and vindicative.

**misombra** · 07-09-09, 11:12 PM

Originally Posted by Wallace Stevens

I think this evades the point somewhat. Relationships are built on trust and mutual support. Couples should be eager to help and support each other. You want to be there, in many ways, for your SO. In contrast, this man sounds selfish and vindicative.

i was with her until she put out the deal. you pay the ticket if you don't do it. she must have not trusted that he would do it on time. she could've had someone else do it or take a little time off to move her car.

if you don't like somebody who's unreliable, then you shouldn't be with them. but don't treat them like shit because of it. people in general are unreliable.

**KandiJ** · 07-09-09, 11:15 PM

Originally Posted by misombra

if i offered to do something for somebody and they told me, "well then your responsible if it doesn't turn out right" i would want to not do it just on principle. and hell if i would pay that ticket HA!

if you want somebody reliable get yourself a servant.

Wow ..... bit harsh lol

He has paid it though

**moonfairy_2002** · 07-09-09, 11:21 PM

I couldnt be with someone that is unreliable. to each his own.

**KandiJ** · 07-09-09, 11:23 PM

Originally Posted by misombra

i was with her until she put out the deal. you pay the ticket if you don't do it. she must have not trusted that he would do it on time. she could've had someone else do it or take a little time off to move her car.

if you don't like somebody who's unreliable, then you shouldn't be with them. but don't treat them like shit because of it. people in general are unreliable.

The reason i said to him that he could pay the ticket if i got one was because he said my car would be fine after the 1.5 hours. I said no seriously it wont, they use CCTV not parking attendants so IF he was moving it could he please move it before the allocated time was up. He said yeah no problem.

**KandiJ** · 07-09-09, 11:29 PM

Originally Posted by Cain

I think it's more that he said he would do it and then didn't.

If I'm counting on someone to do something and they don't do it... repeatedly... the relationship is going to end. They can count on me, so why can't I count on them?

Thats exactly it. If i say im going to do something for him, i do it. If i say ill be somewhere to meet him, im on time.

He always "forgets" or is late.

Fed up of it

**moonfairy_2002** · 07-09-09, 11:34 PM

Can you really live like this with him forever? I would try to explain it to just the way Cain said and see if he is willing to try to change.

**Wallace Stevens** · 07-09-09, 11:36 PM

Originally Posted by moonfairy_2002

Can you really live like this with him forever? I would try to explain it to just the way Cain said and see if he is willing to try to change.

You can't change anyone. This is the first and probably the incontrovertible rule of relationships.

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