Calling while she's on vacation...

[masaki1085]

I've been on 4 exceptional dates in the past two and half weeks with a great girl. It has been going REALLY well in all aspects, and both of us have admitted to each other that we really like each other and like spending time with each other.

Unfortunately, timing-wise, she left on a week-long vacation the day after our last date on Monday night. She, of course, does want to keep things going once she returns.

Before she left, I made sure it was okay to be in touch phone-call wise while she was away (which, of course, it was). We've been shooting a few texts back and forth, here and there over the past two days around her traveling (initiated on both ends), but neither of us have called each other yet.

In this world of the "he's/she's just not that into you" logic and the "invisible rules" of the "dating game," I tend to get into the habit of overthinking about things. As plain and simply dumb as this might sound--I don't know how soon I should try calling (or at all).

What I mean by this... some people say, "Wait for her to call--let her miss you." Then I start thinking, I don't want to be a bother on her trip or come across as needy. But in contrast, the "let her miss you" idea almost seems like a head game--what if she called me later and asked "how come I didn't hear from you?"

Some might also say, however, "You said you were going to call--you should call. Let her know that she's on your mind." She seems to really like me--I'm not sure if I want to send her mixed signals by not calling her (because I really like her), even if she's on vacation.

I, of course, want to be respectful of her space while she is away and give her time to enjoy her vacation and visit her friends. I didn't plan on calling her often or everyday due to that fact--I don't wish to demand her attention or dominate her vacation. But, where is the fine line between being respectful of this space and letting her know that she's on my mind?

[Gigabitch]

I say call her. That "let her miss you" thing can really piss a girl off, especially if she thinks things are going well and suddenly gets radio silence.

Call her and make a plan for date 5.

[masaki1085]

I decided to call her--I ended up getting her voicemail--all I basically said was "...wanted to say hi, see how your vacation was going...looking forward to hearing about what you've been up to, but in the meantime hoping that you're enjoying yourself and i'll talk to you soon..." In a nutshell, I didn't leave any "clause" requesting a call back.

Like I said, I don't want to smother her or call too much... and perhaps I'm overthinking.

She texted back a few texts the next day, asking if one particular time was okay to try to call. Said she missed me. Said she's having a great time but is looking forward to getting home. Apologized for missing my call and said it was confusing to know when to call because of our differing schedules and time differences (she's 3 hours behind on vacation).

I was taking a half personal day yesterday to take a trip this weekend myself for a concert--mentioned that to her in response and said this would be the best time if she wanted to call. She's not the kind of person who keeps her phone readily on her when she's busy--she never actually ended up calling me, which is fine. I'm assuming that she's busy doing vacation things. Haven't heard a text back either. I did not text/call her beyond my one reply to her texts.

The last nugget of information she left me via text might have me worried because I don't want to leave an impression that I expect contact back. I never said anything about expecting her to call, and I hope that I didn't imply it.

Any thoughts on what might be going through her mind?

Or maybe I'm just overthinking?