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Thread: Confused - young man, older woman...

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    Confused - young man, older woman...

    Hi everybody!

    I need some advice. (Un)fortunatelly I fell in love into an older woman. The situation is weird for me, and sometimes it frustrates me. My feelings are strong, and I can't forget her, I want, but I can't. I see her lot of times in a week, and there is no chance to avoid it. There is very very big age difference between us (13 years). I know I have no chance, but I can't suppress my feelings. She is so special for me. I don't know what to do now, I always try to solve my problems, and in almost all cases I can solve them, but now, I can't.

    Please help me!

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    How old are you?
    -to be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting.- e.e.cummings

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    This whole culture of Cougars and Cubs is totally bringing out a new perspective of older women and younger men.
    I think it's great. Nothing more weird than older men and younger women.
    The sexual compatibility between older women and younger men is amazingly great.
    I think people should accept this trend, and don't feel it's anything strange. IMHO.

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    I'll second that kaius.

    Nobody_01, when I was 18 I was dating a woman who was 36. She was EXACTLY 18 years older than me because we were both born on the same day of the same month. As long as you keep the following in mind you should be fine:

    If neither one of you have a problem with the age difference, then there is no problem
    People's tastes in men/women change as they get older. Her tastes probably won't change, but yours might. Make SURE this is what you want or you'll end up hurting her.
    People continue to get older. Will you still be ok with the age difference in 20 years?
    Will you be able to tolerate the physical signs of aging enough that you will still be in love, be committed, and not cheat? (ie wrinkles, gray hair, more medical attention/issues)
    You have to be a strong person, because you will be criticized.

    By the way, how old are you?
    ...one can be sure of nothing until it has already happened...

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    I think I have always been attracted to women in late 30s / early 40s. When I was 19, I had a short fling with a 40 year old woman. She was the best I ever had, until now.
    My taste in women actually never changed. I ended up marrying someone 3 years older than me when I was 23. I think she was too immature for me....
    Now I am 35, and I am dating a 38 year old goddess, and I am super happy. I look forward to aging with her, because she would just get hotter to me.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Kaius View Post
    I think I have always been attracted to women in late 30s / early 40s. When I was 19, I had a short fling with a 40 year old woman. She was the best I ever had, until now.
    My taste in women actually never changed. I ended up marrying someone 3 years older than me when I was 23. I think she was too immature for me....
    Now I am 35, and I am dating a 38 year old goddess, and I am super happy. I look forward to aging with her, because she would just get hotter to me.
    I want to clone you and pass you out to my single girlfriends.
    Spammer Spanker

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    Is she single? And also, how old are you?
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

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    Im hoping he's at least 18 or 19. That way it wouldn't be a big issue imo unless one of them finds it weird.
    -to be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting.- e.e.cummings

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    I hope he is at least 25... 18 is pretty young!
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

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    I'd hope that a 25 year old man wouldn't be asking a question like that. The context of the last three sentences lead me to believe that this is a very young man, perhaps 18-21.
    ...one can be sure of nothing until it has already happened...

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    Incognito, you are right about my age, I'm 19.5 years old. To the question of vashti, she is single.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Nobody_01 View Post
    Incognito, you are right about my age, I'm 19.5 years old. To the question of vashti, she is single.
    I am not surprised you are attracted to a woman in her early 30s. First we are more confident and happy with ourselves than before then it's an age at which a woman does not really look her age.

    I think I look 26-27 rather than 34 (my brother's mates stare at me very often and they are 19).

    I have a got a friend I met when she was 34 ( my age today) and at the time I was convinced she was 22. She just has this beautiful fresh English rose complexion + a tiny body...

    Sorry not trying to make this all about me....

    So really I am not surprised you feel attracted. Women are taking care of themselves more and more these days and some women in their 40s could very well pull a 20 year old!!!

    Anyway. Now if I were in her shoes I know I would not go there. In her 30s a woman wants the real deal and everything might go too quickly for your liking...

    Depending on how you look. I mean if you don't look like a teenager I would indulge into a fling with you. But then again I know I would get attached...
    "Oh I could spend my life having this conversation. Look, please try to understand before one of us dies"

    Quote Originally Posted by Yet another guy View Post
    It's just plain simpler to view the world as black and white rather than probabilistic shades of gray.

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    Right on, Kaius. In college, I dated ladies in their late-twenties. In my late-twenties now, I'm dating a gorgeous 34-year-old. I've never been attracted to someone 18 years older than me (that's a little too Mrs. Robinson for me), but relationships with women a few years older are so much more fulfilling. Women in their 30's and 40's are superior to college girls in damn near every way.

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    I might have a fling with someone so much younger, but if I were you, I wouldn't get my heart set on an actual relationship.
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

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    My woman is 38 years old, blonde and really pretty. She's a high school teacher. Those horny teenage boys
    fantisize about her im sure. She hates the term MILF, but im sure they all think of her that way....i know i would if i were a 16 year old kid. Interestingly, my woman considers a 28 year old man a baby. She likes a mature man with career accomplishments and sophistication. Well...for once in my life im glad im not 18 anymore.

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