Dating my Ex-Girlfriend's best friend

[Random Guy]

Hey folks, this forum seemed as good a place as any to ask for some advice regarding my particular situation.

So, here's the story, I'll try to keep it small:

I broke up with my girlfriend of three years in January after she had an affair behind my back. Her sleeping around went on for about two weeks before I found out and things ended. So, I guess you could say we didn't quite finish on good terms.

Initially I turned to friends for comfort, but there was one particular mutual friend who I got closer to as a result. She is my ex-girlfriend's best friend but she couldn't believe what had happened and talking to her really helped me get over the relationship.

About a month ago me and this new girl started talking more and started going out to the same places. We found that we had more in common than we thought and there was a physical attraction there as well.

Well, a couple days ago we admitted to each other that we liked each other. Not only is my ex-girlfriend a problem in this scenario, but this girl also has a boyfriend of about two months.

The girl I like says that it would be really tough for anything to happen between us because of her being so close to my ex. In fact as we started to hang around more some people started to say that we should get together. My ex heard about this and told her that she would be uncomfortable with it.

Unfortunately everything just seems too awkward to even contemplate having a relationship with this new girl. But we get on so well and we've told each other that we have feelings for one another.

My question is, is dating an ex-girlfriend's best friend ever OK? Personally I think it should depend on the terms of the breakup. She cheated on me and left me broken hearted. And to top it all off she is now in a relationship with the guy she cheated on me with. I don't think she should have any right to say, "I'd find that uncomfortable, I wouldn't like you to go out with him." Fair enough, if we broke up on good terms then sure, but after everything that has happened? She's moved on now, and I want to as well.

But my ex's best friend, she says that she has to stay her best friend despite what she has done to me and despite what she feels, she can't just go and start dating me.

So what's the general consensus? Is it OK to date my ex's best friend after everything that has happened? Or should I try and leave things be, however hard that is?

[xxazurexx]

Your ex cheated.

And am I right in thinking that her best friend has a bf?

If so and if cheating was that big of a deal to you, you wouldn't be trying to cheat a guy of his gf. You are doing to someone else, what they did to you!
One rule for you huh?

Dating my best friends ex, would be a 'no go' for me. It's something I wouldn't do and have never done.
I'm loyal like that and to my friends.

[Olderandwiser49]

I agree you shouldn't see her, but not because she is your ex's best friend (that doesn't seem to bother her, does it?). Ex is past tense, and she certainly doesn't seem to have any concerns about you. No, I wouldn't date her because a person who will cheat with you, will cheat on you. It's a virtual guarantee.

[lahnnabell]

Apparently this girl doesn't think much of her "best friend" if she's contemplating dating her ex boyfriend (you). My friends exes are off limits as a general rule. And this girl has a boyfriend. If you pursue this girl while she is still with him, it puts you in the same boat as this your ex's new boyfriend.