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Thread: am i in the wrong??

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
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    Female
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    am i in the wrong??

    me and my boyfriend have been together a year and a half. 6 months into our relationship he we had an argument, he went to a party and told me the next day he was tempted to cheat on me but didn't. since then i have found it really hard to trust him. Theres a girl he use to go to school with about 8 months into our relationship he started meeting her like once a week for dinner, everytime they were on online at the same time they would sit and chat for ages, he would even carry his laptop round the house to carry on talking to her instead of simply telling her he was busy? there have been occasions when we have been out with our couple friends and hes left me with the 2 of them to go meet her & when we went away for the weekend he sat textin her through the meal and in the hotel room. i told him i felt uncomfortable about how he was with her, esoecially meeting her so much for dinner an he told me they have always been really good friends... i told him that if this was the case they would of done this the first 8 months of our relationship? and i would like him to stop seeing her so much. am i in the wrong?

    he also talks to some girl in scotland, we live in england. he met her online and has never met her in person. sometimes when were suppose to be watching a dvd or in bed and she texts him - he goes online to chat to her. he knew her before me, they skype and ive seen old messages between them where he tells her how beautiful she is and they say "love you" to each other, i dislike this and the fact he gives up us spending tine togeter to talk to some girl hes never
    met - however he keeps askin when shes going to come down and meet him. i want to tell him i dont mind her talking to him but not all of the time and not them arranging to meet up - he stopped me emailing some boy i have known for 7 years... why is it okay for him too?

    i have lost all my trust in him. i always find porn on his phone or laptop & whenever we drive past girls walking in the street he stares.. he says this is to see if he knows them, however he never looks when we go past males or older people, it really bothers me he checks people out infront of me and makes it so obvious. he sits online on forums looking at photos of girls ... or always going through photos ofnl girls on facebook... its getting really bad, i hate watching tv/films with attractive women in them or the thought of him going out drinking with friends or away with them as i feel he'll be on the look out.. and after him already being tempted t to cheat, i really worry. shall i talk to him and tell him how insecure i am? and if so, how do i appproach the matter?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Gender
    Female
    Posts
    6
    I don't think you're in the wrong here. I'd say he's having an emotional affair with these other women, actually.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Gender
    Female
    Location
    Waco, TX
    Posts
    420
    He has many flaws that by themselves may be overlooked, but all these things together sound like a recipe for disaster.
    I have a male friend I go and hang out with, even at his apartment. My husband is fine with this, in fact, he looks forward to these nights because he can go out to the garage and do manly things without me being needy of his time. My husband has a female friend he's had lunch with, and sometimes they text. But I would be upset if he called her beautiful, if he said, "love you", or if he gave up time with me to be with her.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Posts
    597
    "he was tempted to cheat on me but didn't."
    "he started meeting her like once a week for dinner, everytime they were on online at the same time they would sit and chat for ages, he would even carry his laptop round the house to carry on talking to her instead of simply telling her he was busy?"
    "sometimes when were suppose to be watching a dvd or in bed and she texts him - he goes online to chat to her" . . . just wow
    "he checks people out infront of me and makes it so obvious"

    --> he's not trustworthy and he's disrespecting you . . . leave him and find someone who will treat you better

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Gender
    Male
    Location
    CALIFORNIA
    Posts
    244
    Eh, im 50/50 on this. U should have said something long time ago. imo Hey, at least he tells u and compfy bout saying it. But, ya... u need to let him know how u feel now. So, good luck

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