Hey everyone! Allow me to first introduce myself. My name is PJ, I'm a 20 year old male from New Jersey and im a college student. I've been struggling for the past couple of years in the dating world, and so I'm here to help seek the advice of others. Allow me to first give you a brief background...
All throughout my high school career, I was what I'd call successful with women. Being not the most popular kid in school, and being very shy to new faces, I managed to have various girlfriends all throughout high school. Over the summer before my first year of college, I had broken up with my girlfriend (not because of college I should add) and was looking forward to seeing what school had in store for me.
Now, unfortunately, my results were less than expected. I should add that I am not "in" with the social norms, I don't drink alcohol or do any type of drugs. Ive never had a desire to do so, and as good as it makes me feel that I know I don't cave in, at the same time it also screws me over in the sense that I never had that strong desire to go out and party. Now don't get me wrong, it never stopped me from going to parties, but at the same time I dont exactly call hanging around with a bunch of trashed kids a good time either.
Anyways, lets just say that I've been unsuccessful with relationships since the end of high school. I've been with a few girls here and there, but things just went wrong and unfortunately didn't work out (due to distance, loss of interest etc.). Now, here's where I get to my most recent timeline. As of 2010, I've had 4 potential relationships that in all cases the girl ended up changing her mind. Now, the situations were all slightly different, but to go into them is pointless because well yeah it still ended up in the same result.
At this point I just don't know what I'm doing wrong. Im not the best looking guy out there, but I know that I'm not hideous or anything. And yes, I have a shy personality at first, but I am a fun person and am very easy to talk to once I get to know someone. Is it my personality that does it? I am a very caring, nice person, sort of old fashioned if you will. Im not like most people my age, I'm very respectful and have a hard time "treating girls like shit to get their attention". I think its wrong so I just don't do it. Do I need to be more aggressive? Do I need to push myself past that point and just take authority?
For all of you who read the whole thing, I thank you and look forward to getting some help from all of you. Thank you!