This girl has really...really...messed with my head and heart.
Alright first off, this is not my main way of meeting girls and I did not have any hope that I would actually find someone on a dating site.
Short version,
Girl messaged me. Thought she was kinda cute so I replied. We must have messaged each other at least once a day for a month. Just talking about soccer games, music, whatever. I gave her my phone number and email saying she can call me whenever. One day, she messages me (kind of the same time that I was trying to meet her or try to get her phone number) that her parents are getting divorced and she has sisters blablabla. She said, in a nice way, that she wasn't "ready" to meet anyone new whether as a friend or date. While she said this, she writes things like "you're so amazing" or "hugs"...things like that. If it weren't for those hints I would have dropped the whole thing and never write back unless she did.
So, after a few weeks, I caved in and messaged her this long letter and this thing was crazy okay...I didn't know I could write something like this...it was good but sappy ya know....anyway, she responds with a message that told me how cute she thought I was but also that she wouldn't talk or meet me or anyone because of her "situation" and hopefully in January we'll catch up again and meet and so on. The reason I believe she said January is because she is supposedly enrolling into the same college as myself for the spring. School starts in a week from now.
Well, as I said before, this girl absolutely tortured my heart. I don't know why...I don't know how....and I don't know why it hasn't faded.
I felt so connected to this girl for her personality, that of course, I couldn't wait to try and meet her when college starts. Naturally, I looked her up on facebook. Yep...and I found her. Her profile is completely private and all that... I resisted sending her a message...until January 4th. (Now, keep in mind, I haven't talked to her since October) I caved in and wrote another one of those lovey dovey-ish letters. It was because of this damn romantic movie I had just watched and friggin Itunes playing some songs out of my "Romantic" playlist.
I haven't heard anything from her since. So, did I go overboard? Did I write too much too fast? I guess if you girls need to see that final letter I gave her on Jan. 4th I'll private message you it. It's um....I don't know...I worry that I came off as a "weirdo" now and ruined any chance by not only writing her this letter but also looking her up on facebook and messaging her.