*Sigh* please give advice

[Mimi_B]

Oh he never has treated me bad, but I know right now he doesn't care for he child and I'm happy now.
I don't want stress or problems so I asked him to stay away now while I'm pregnant,
I never told him to stay away from the child, I said I WANT HIM THERE FOR HIS CHILD!

Lol what are you people reading? I'm pretty sure I said that already.

[xxazurexx]

Would you not agree that it's better for your child to know his/her father. you have absolutely NO idea how the guy would treat the kid, probably A LOT better than he's ever treated you. It's going to hurt your child because he/she will be missing a parent. There's a lot a man can bring to the table when it comes to raising a child, yeah I know, single parents all over the world, thats doest mean you're still not selling your kid short by denying him/her to know their father. There's lots of great fathers out there that weren't ready for a kid when they got one........

She will let him see the baby and when things are all going her way....

And he will be walking around on egg shells to keep her face straight and just so he can see his kid.

[xxazurexx]

Oh he never has treated me bad, but I know right now he doesn't care for he child and I'm happy now.
I don't want stress or problems so I asked him to stay away now while I'm pregnant,
I never told him to stay away from the child, I said I WANT HIM THERE FOR HIS CHILD!

Lol what are you people reading? I'm pretty sure I said that already.

Well he can't be there and won't be there 24/7.....like you are probably hoping.

He has his OWN life too.

[Mimi_B]

Yeah, well he parties like every day and goes out to bars and drinks, and he smokes (weed) and other crap too. I don't think its bad (we're from ny) but it is bad when it come to my baby you get it?
That is what I mean, I'm also not going to be leaving my child with him so he can leave the baby with a family member to go do him.

This isn't about me and him, it's about what is best for "our" baby.

[xxazurexx]

^Well a man who drank and smoked weed, wouldn't get around my kid either....unless supervised.

[Mimi_B]

I definitely dont want or need him there 24/7
but he will be the father and i won't prevent him from being there when the child needs him.
I'm definitely not going through no custody battle and i now he wont put me or the child through that and I wont do it either.
but you guys misunderstood me, i asked him to stay away now while I'm pregnant. not later on.

[Mimi_B]

yes that is exactly how i feel like, i'm not sure what he will be doing if i'm not around.
I know he's not a bad man, but i also don't know anymore up to what point he has taken his drinking, partying and smoking now a days.
but i know it is sometime every week, and not just on weekends! so can you see my point now. I'm not trying to be a bad mom, I'm just trying to be a good one.

[Queentee]

well i gues u can just give him a chance to be there but is he decides not to be then thats when you may want to consider not allowing him to see his child.At his age though its very surprising but since u said u live in a good environment heyy u might not even need him then .Best of luck


@xxazurexx CHILLAX

[Mimi_B]

[QUOTE
@xxazurexx CHILLAX[/QUOTE]

Thanks for all your help. But yeah that is exactly how feel right now and it's what I will be doing. Thanks again

[xxazurexx]

I am chilled....just speaking my mind.

You just came across in your posts, that you think because you are pregnant, this guy now owes you something and is obligated to you. He isn't....

The way I see things is, is that this guy isn't to blame and for the predicament you are in and because you chose to have sex with a guy you were not in a stable relationship with....therefore he owed you and owes you nothing.

If he's acting all hostile, etc now, he probably hasn't quite got used to the idea yet - it's a lot for him to take in and adapt too.

If he contacts you, then tell him he can see the child.

Just don't expect anything from him. By that I mean, him committing to you.

Good luck anyway....single mums can do it alone and there are thousands and thousands to prove it.