Does anyone have anything good to say about Online Dating?

[maxmax]

Depends on what you're looking for.

Well, in most cases, if you're looking for sex, you'll probably find it.

[seganomics]

My experience with POF was alright. Ok Cupid has been a mixed bag. Someone earlier said the trick is to meet them soon instead of putzing around with emails and I think that's the case. The more emails the romantized that person has become, or it gets to a point where it's awkward to ask to meet in person as you've been talking with someone for six months with the eqiv of a conversation in an elevator.

But I suppose it doesn't matter where you meet someone. My friend is married to her mail man. But she's the happiest married person I know right now.

My problem is I don't go a lot of places regularly except for starbucks. Maybe I should go a few times without my headphones in and be open to interaction.

[oldskool83]

POF landed me more dates and girls the ok cupid...but at the time i did have massive long crazy hair so im sure lots of women were not into that. the min i shaved my head and loaded a new pic up everyone started saying i hot and messages came in. i seemed to connect better with older women 28-35 on okcupid and young ones around 19-25 on POF.

part of my issue with online dating is ive noticed some women only want the attention, some will call and text you everyday but are to busy to date...to me whats the point of wanting to date then? just somthing to keep in mind.

[MarkAPS]

I personally don't have any problems with online dating. It's just a different game.

[Boisdevie]

I'm a big fan of using website to meet people. I met my GF online and without the 'net we would never have met in a million years because she lives 80 miles away from me and because she has kids she can't exactly hang around bars in the hope of meeting somebody. We talked for a long time before we met in person - good way of knowing you're not dealing with a loony.

[seganomics]

I mean it must work to some extent right? Otherwise it still wouldn't be around. But I'm beginning to feel like for a true lasting relationship you need to be friends first. Is that possible to cultivate with someone online thru a site like OKCupid or POF or is it all about instant gratification?

I see it working with like a forum or game, but is there such a thing as an online dating site for friends? I know everyone says they are looking for friend first but are they actually? Seems like being on a dating site has the end desire of being with someone romantically.

[legality]

it all depends, I met my bf on an online language learning site but its been 2 years of long distance relationship and we are together but I wasn't on that website to fall in love or flirt with someone. I truly was learning a language and fell in love with him!

[smackie9]

Women have high expectation and looking for dude with money and looks, guys are usually looking for sex.....with a hottie. The free sites are around not because they work, but there a lot of hopefuls like yourself that get sucked in to the concept that you will find true love on there...the advertisers are the ones that keep these sites going, and by no means because of a success rate.

[kageri]

Someone earlier said the trick is to meet them soon instead of putzing around with emails and I think that's the case.

I spent 6months talking to my now husband online before we met. I didn't find that length of time I talked to someone really made that much difference except that I refused to meet anyone after one short exchange. I quickly blocked the guys who immediately wanted to call and set up a date that week. There's not a chance in hell I'll meet someone off the internet when I know absolutely nothing about them. Most of the time we talked a couple weeks and then we'd meet.

The free sites are around not because they work, but there a lot of hopefuls like yourself that get sucked in to the concept that you will find true love on there

I never used anything but free sites and I not only found dates that weren't just looking for sex but married someone of one of those free sites. It works just fine if you have the patience to wade through the junk and you don't have unreal expectations. Since it's the internet where things happen fast people seem to expect they will meet someone quickly when really it's no faster than dating off the internet. I met someone I wanted to date about every 6months off the internet and I met someone I wanted to talk to about every 4 months and someone I wanted to date about every 6months on the internet. It's pretty equivalent really.

[seganomics]

Kageri, did you reach out to your husband or did he reach out to you... was he in a match or did you just stumble upon each other. I've been wondering with OK Cupid. I'm typically pretty passive and then complain that I can't find anyone... BUt should I be aggressive in my search or will it just happen?

[maxmax]

Nothing 'just happens' at least, not usually.

If you want something to happen, put some efforts toward it.

[Riku]

I met the guy I'm seeing now on OK Cupid and things are going REALLY good. I don't remember how his profile showed up but I looked at it, thought he was really cute, couldn't think of what to say so I moved on. I planned on going back and messaging him later but then the next day he beat me to it and messaged me.

Yeah a lot of guys on these sites are just looking for sex but not all of them. It's pretty easy to spot them, ignore any guy that has a pic with his shirt off and you have that narrowed down by about 70%. The rest you can just tell by conversation and how they talk. Don't be aggressive in searching it's about meeting someone you connect with and being too aggressive I think makes it look like you are just trying to get a relationship without caring who it's with. Just sign up, look around, message people that peak your interest and see where it goes. I haven't tried PoF but I like that on OK Cupid guys can see that you looked at them so a lot of times they will end up messaging you simply because of that, I don't know if it gives them a bit of confidence in thinking you are already into them or what.

[Wakeup]

Of course it is.

Unlike Evo, however, I wouldn't refer to the vast majority of women on the sites I've been on as 'grossly unattractive'.

So, either he is particularly fussy, or he lives in one god-ugly part of town.

I'm thinking he's an over-achiever..

[kageri]

From searches and the newer quiver thing I'd pick 3 guys a week to stalk their profiles. At the end of a week whoever didn't message me I'd either decide to message or throw them in the failure pile. In frustration during one of those weeks I tried blocking whatever the "casual sex" option was at the time because I was tired of the guys messaging me and immediately wanting to meet for sex. Then I realized that every guy allows for that option just in case and I'd therefore just blocked pretty much everyone including my stalking targets for the week. I decided to fix my error by messaging all of them and that included my husband. He had a not serious gf at the time which is why he didn't message me and I had a guy I was seeing, met on okcupid, that I was refusing to officially call a bf so we started talking with no real plan where anything was going. We complained about our not serious relationships and the subsequent break ups from them to each other along with sharing the more insane messages we were getting on dating sites until I finally asked him if he was ever going to invite me to meet or what. A few months later he was moving in to my house and a few months after that we were married. 2 1/2 years later I don't regret any of it.

[Evo1114]

I'm thinking he's an over-achiever..

I'm just an above-average dude who needs an above-average mate.