My long distance boyfriend says he's confused about our relationship...

[Jessica1]

and he wants to separate for a while?
Okay, so my bf went mia for about 4 days. He then texts me saying that we're moving too fast and that we should separate for awhile because the fact that I was far from him made him sad and unable to focus.
Background info:
-We're both in college..freshmen. We are high school sweethearts. I go to school in Arizona and he's about four hours away in New Mexico (which means that yes we are within traveling distance from each other and he visited me last week).
-When he visited, we practically got naked and had what would have been sex if I wasn't so tight.
-I must add that before coming, I went about a day without speaking to him after a convo in which he basically complained about me not contacting him in 2 days o_O BUT now he's complaining that we shouldn't speak every night be/c he's busy!! wtf? what does he want??
-During the 4 days that he went MIA, I did send him a text every night (note: I would have NEVER done this if he didn't say we should at least speak once a day). and it wasn't like a "wtf are you doing??" type of text..it was more like a "are you okay..havent heard from you in awhile" type of text. I called him after the 3rd night as well.
-NOW i learn that he's basically been ignoring them o_O

i am just sooo confused and hurt. i love him a lot. i told him that it's okay if we break up but then he's like "nooooo i don't want to do that...im just confused right now" and then he stammers and stammers and can't get the words out of his mouth.
ughh WHAT DO I DO?? what do i say?? should i end the relationship right now? or should I wait for him to not be confused anymore? but while waiting, i'll be all fvcked up in the head thinking about

[smackie9]

He maybe is weighing his options. Stay with you and tough it out with the distance, or take his chances on the girl he has an interest in, with the possibly having regular sex.


The stammering is caused by guilt.

[bulrush]

Um, yeah. I went to college to get a very tough technical 4 year degree, but freshman year was just a review for me, really easy. So, it's not that he's too busy from classes, he may be too busy partying.

So you confirmed he is, in fact, ignoring your texts? LDRs are tough, I think you have to come to terms this may not work out. He might want to see you and see other girls on his campus. Of course he won't tell you because he will assume you would freak out.

I had an LDR, gf was 6 hrs away. It was working fine, until she decided we have different long term goals. It was ok, she told me she had to think about her long term goals the first time we met in person, and we eventually parted as best friends, each of us saying how great the other one was. It was a surreal breakup. It was like breaking up with my best friend, we were happy and sad at the same time. Happy to have met each other, but sad to part.

[James Banes]

Your dude doesn't sound like he's interested in the relationship. You're more like an escort than a gf. I'm 27, and I've been going to college off and on for years (some day I'll get that biological science degree....yes!!!) and I've had LDR while in college. It's extemely difficult to be at college and not look at other hotties. He's a freshman. Of course, he's looking at other chicks. How could you think otherwise?

Confession: I cheated in college while a sophomore with a girl I said I loved. She lived 2 hours away and it was sooo easy. I felt more like a stud than a jerk. I was thinking, "I'm 20 yrs old. How long are chances to **** girls my age going to last? Why should I be chaste to a girl who lives hours away?" She never found out and I don't think I've ever regretted it.

I've got bad news for you: he's looking at other chicks.

[Jessica1]

wow thanks.
any other advice?

[surfhb]

wow thanks.
any other advice?

I agree with James..... he wants out of the relationship. I hate to say this but you need to explore the world a little. Your in college and your worried about a guy you rarely see?

[IndiReloaded]

Your dude doesn't sound like he's interested in the relationship.

I've got bad news for you: he's looking at other chicks.

I agree. The more you chase him, the more he's going to pull away. Find another guy that YOU like and tell your BF you are thinking of 'a break'. See what pings.