Met someone online and now we're going to meet. But I am a Fat Guy.

[Dolmetscher]

I just moved to a new city. I've never met someone online before, but I figured, since I work all day, and am brand new to town... I'd sign up for one of those online dating sites. It worked. I've had probably 15 ladies respond. I'd say 75% of them I can cross off immediately for one reason or another. But there is this one that I connected with. We talk on the phone a lot. And we text everyday. She seems to be really into me. She always texts me first, and she calls me, and she makes lots of comments about how she really enjoys talking to me. She even said that it feels like she's known me her whole life.

Now, not to sound too arrogant, but I am a very likable guy. I have traveled the world, and lived in Europe for 6 years. I am a trained chef. I worked for CNN in Atlanta. I now have a great job in software. I speak four languages fluently. I'm not rich, but I can pay my bills. And no matter where I go, I make people crack up laughing, and end up hearing things like, "You are the coolest guy! What's your number?"

And I am tall... 6 ft. 4 inches (almost 2 meters for you EU folks). But... I am also over-weight. Now... I am not a total wobbling pumpkin, or so fat that I look like I might drop dead of a heart attack any second. But I have a real belly. I mean, you know how some guys have gotten a little soft in the stomach? Well, I am very soft. XXL soft. Everybody tells me that I carry it well, and that I don't look "Fat"... I just look like a big guy. Anyway... who cares what they say. I know how I feel. And I feel like a fat guy. And I've seen pictures of this girl, and she is beautiful. She has the prettiest face with the prettiest blue eyes. I am very attracted to her, but I really just like the way she is, and the things we talk about.

I did not mis'represent myself or anything. I included two pictures of myself and one of my dog, because the dog kinda comes with the deal. Both pictures are recent, and very clear pictures of my face. But in both pictures, I am wearing dark shirts, and standing directly infront of the camera, so... I have to admit, they are my "best pictures". I guess everyone does that on those sites. I'm sure she didn't post her worst picture. Anyway... getting to the point. I am supposed to meet her one day this week. For all the ladies who might be reading this... please be brutally honest, would a guy that you really really liked personality wise, who turned out to be over-weight... still be someone that you could be with? I know every girl's different. I am just looking for some perspective here. Thanks for reading!

[Saya]

Everyone is different and some girls might like big guys and some likes skinny guys etc...

Personally, I probably wouldn't mind about the looks since I care about the personality/sense of humor and since I like talking, if a guy can talk/interact/list and understand me then it's great for me.
If you have good personality then I don't think looks would matter that much, but that's just me I guess.
One of my friend is similar to me, she even mentioned to me that her bf isn't that good looking/attractive guy, but she loves his personality so much and that he is so kind and nice to her. They've been together for 2years now.

So I guess, it really depends on girls...
But if you care about what you look like then maybe you can dress up nicely with black or dark shirt so that you could look a little bit slimming? Since black/dark colour will make you look a bit slimming. Just like what you mentioned about your pictures.

[Dolmetscher]

Thanks Saya...

I agree. From a man's perspective. I don't care if are a girl is absolutely gorgeous or if she is plain and wears nerdy glasses. If she and I hit it off, and she is at least somehow cute to me, on even the smallest of levels, I would be all into her. I guess I should just shut up and meet this girl before I keep taking to her on the phone, and really start to have feelings for her. That way, things are still casual, and IF she does not like how I look, I haven't gone too far down the rabbit hole of talking to her.

[Gypsybell]

Thanks Saya...

I agree. From a man's perspective. I don't care if are a girl is absolutely gorgeous or if she is plain and wears nerdy glasses. If she and I hit it off, and she is at least somehow cute to me, on even the smallest of levels, I would be all into her. I guess I should just shut up and meet this girl before I keep taking to her on the phone, and really start to have feelings for her. That way, things are still casual, and IF she does not like how I look, I haven't gone too far down the rabbit hole of talking to her.

Height is a big factor in your favour, There's a world of difference between a mountain and a molehill. You sound like an impressive guy all round, she's sure to have picked that up. I wouldn't worry too much. Personality wins everytime for my vote, But just tell her what to expect if you're going to worry enough to be nervous on your first sight. A big confident grin is what you need, and maybe a hug so she can feel all small and dainty. That's a turn on for women, whatever we say, we like our men to be big and strong! Don't forget to wear a really nice aftershave. I wish you well.

[devonbrown]

As a guy, I can only tell you what my female friends have told me. And the height thing is a big deal to most women. As for the belly, I think it depends completely on the woman in question. Some don't mind, some might. But the biggest thing that everyone says is that if you have confidence, treat the woman well, and attempt to carry yourself well, some physical "flaws" don't make that big of a difference.

Good luck.

[ochriso]

[url=http://forum.bodybuilding.com/]Bodybuilding.com Forums - Bodybuilding And Fitness Board[/url]

[Atlas]

Almost everybody only post their best pics online......you have a lot to offer her...don't worry about it and she won't...girls like Per$$sonality......

[Sonrisa]

post your pic here to get an honest opinion

[girl68]

I'll be dead honest. I'm pretty sure you think of her like my dude thought of me. I too had insane chemistry with him (a random I met online) and was super eager to meet him.

Well I met him, he was fat- it was a straight up deal breaker. It wasn't that he wasn't sweet, kind blah blah... there was just the immediate thought I'd never want to have sex with him. Instant turn off. Needless to say I never spoke to him again after the date. He called me twice, then got the hint. I felt like a bit of a bitch, considering the chemistry but I wasn't going to force some attraction when there physically was none, not even a little bit to work with.

And I'm not a total superficial little twat. When I first met my guy now, I wrote him off because he was short, he grew on me and I'm totally in love with a shortie.

Lesson: hit or miss man you really never know. Have fun at the best of your ability.

[Sonrisa]

and you can charm her with your fingering skills

[sadie_genie]

It is not a major issue. You are like a giant huggable bear!

[HeartIsAching]

Did you lie? Did you deliberately omit the truth? Then you might have an issue.

Then again, you might get lucky.

[vashti]

Most women are more forgiving of physical flaws than men are. It probably wouldn't be a deal-breaker for me... your other attributes would probably compensate.