Suddenly a different aspect on how we should have sex?

[Togoru]

So my boyfriend recently has been into wanting to try sex with out condoms. It started a week or so ago, it was before we had sex and he started rubbing against me and attempted to start with out one on. When I asked what he was doing, since before we always had used back up protection, he said he wanted to see what it felt like with out a condom "just for a couple seconds". Well I wasn't wet enough so he couldn't even get it that time, so we put a condom on and then were able to. But the next time we had sex after that, he first had a condom on for a little, took it off and finished with out one. Then the last time my boyfriend and I had sex he went in me with out a condom on at all. don't worry, I don't need a lecture I am on birth control and take it regularly so I am not worried about pregnancy. my boyfriend and I have always use condoms but more recently he's been interested in having sex with out condoms. Before he was always afraid to, or didn't think of it as the safest idea, or didn't want to risk it or try it til marriage at least. Even though I've been on birth control for months now and even a couple months ago he wasn't fond of the idea of sex with out condoms for all those reasons. and suddenly he wants to experience that and do that with out them? What do you think is the reason if he was once so against it but now wants to? Also, last time we had sex, I never noticed him doing this behavior before, but he turned his head to look down at himself going inside me while he was thrusting a few times. Is that usual for guys to do? What's up with that?

[IndiReloaded]

Condoms aren't just to prevent pregnancy. I hope he doesn't have an STI.

Most sensible people insist on condoms until they are sure they are in a longterm, monogamous relationship. How long have the two of you been together?

[whenweawake]

i am having the same issue. i have been with my bf for 6 months we both made sure no std before hand but i still fear the 2 percent chance of becoming pregnate. we had the talk that if he wants to continue this way he needs to deal with the 2 percent chance, we agreed but im still scared and honestly dont like the mess.

[Togoru]

We've been together for a year and a half now. We were always exclusive and never had interest in anyone else or intentions to hook up with anyone else while together even at the very start of our relationship. He doesn't have an STD or anything like that. I don't either. So we were never worried about STDS or STIs cause we were always exclusive with each other and lost our virginity to each other. We always used condoms even when i was on BC a few months back (and still am on the pill) and even with the pill, my "perfect use" of it, we still talked about sex with out a condom before and agreed to wait tonedperience it. Although suddenly now he wanted to try it and we did. I don't understand what made him want to try despite brig scared/nervous to try before. Also, I don't mind no condom but sometimes I wonder about the accuracy of the pill even though I take it regularly there's still always a chance. And the "mess" isn't always the best. But I can feel it more with out a condom too and I asked him and it seems like it's what he prefers now cause he can "feel it better" too. I have mixed feelings about it.

[Kaius]

If you are on the pill, and neither has STDs, then why worry? I have had sex for over 20 years....with girlfriends, strangers, and wife (at that time).
I almost never used a condom, and all these years I never got a woman pregnant, and never contracted an STD. If you are sure enough that
nothing bad would happen, you don't need a condom. By the way, none of the women I've been with were on the pill. You just gotta know what you are doing.

The reason why men enjoy "bareback" is because it feels 100x better. It feels amazing. Frankly, I don't consider it "real sex" when condom is involved.
It's basically a barrier, so there is no contact at all. It's so impersonal, and totally defeats the purpose. I suspect your boyfriend saw some porn, which
is always "bareback" and he wants to experience it....hence the looking down.

[malteser]

Also, last time we had sex, I never noticed him doing this behavior before, but he turned his head to look down at himself going inside me while he was thrusting a few times. Is that usual for guys to do? What's up with that?

This does seem like a usual thing for guys to do. They are turned on by visuals so I believe this is why they do it.

[Kaius]

This does seem like a usual thing for guys to do. They are turned on by visuals so I believe this is why they do it.

I always look down to see the entry. As a matter of fact, I prop up myself so I can see myself go in and out of my woman. It is the biggest turn on.
Also, watching her big breasts bounce while we have sex is the most awesome visual stimulation. Yes men are visual.

[Togoru]

I just typed a HUGE message out and accidentally hit the "back" button, my gosh that sucks.
so here goes again but probably not as good as the first time I typed this all out...

There's always a risk even with protection. The fact that you had sex with those women and didn't have any sort of protection I'd suppose it is a matter of luck rather than "knowing what you're doing".

But that's something I always wonder. I use the pill every day and "perfectly" with never missing one. I have been taking it since June now. Even with the pill by itself as a contraceptive, 1 in 100 women still become pregnant in a year. The sensible side of me would want to be as protected as possible but the pill is pretty effective though so I guess I'd have nothing to really worry about.

For any ladies on BC, do you just use the pill alone as protection with no back up? How do you feel when using it alone: confident or sometimes anxious?

[Mona_B]

Ok, maybe it is a different culture here. I would find it strange to use condoms with someone in a relationship. Maybe he simply feels safe enough with you now and ready to accept the minimum chance of an "accident". That should actually make you feel good. And if you are worried that he could have STD and want to be sure, why don't you both simply go and get tested?

Sorry, I really don't see the problem...

[Lover14]

Its just because it feels better, and seeing it probably turn him on more! Don't fret.

[Superfantastich]

I don't use condoms and take my pill very regularly, in the beginning I was slightly anxious but once you get away with it a few months in a row you are fine
As Mona B said I guess its just being willing to take responsibility for that slim chance of pregnancy and how tragic it would be if you were to get pregnant
the choice is yours..

[bulrush]

The 2% failure rate for the pill is because a company simply cannot claim something is 100% effective. It's about liability. That 2% also covers really stupid people who think you only take the pill on days you have sex, or for people who keep "forgetting" to take a pill and, for example, skip 3 in a row.

I had sex with women for years who were on the pill and we had no problems. Just be careful if you take an oral antibiotic as some of them render the pill ineffective. Your doctor talked to you about this, right?

[MaidenMinx]

I always found I was never 100% confident in the effectiveness of the pill. I've always hated condoms so never used them in a relationship. When I fell pregnant I wasn't on any sort of contraception. I was under the impression that I was too unhealthy for it to happen.

Out of all the contraceptives I've tried I'm enjoying the ius the most. It has dual ability to protect against pregnancy though it's risks are high enough that here in Aus they won't prescribe it to women that haven't finished child bearing or don't have a monogamous partner.

On the watching himself thing, I've not yet met a guy who doesn't enjoy watching himself thrust away. Personally, I enjoy watching it too.

[sweetiepopeye]

If you are on the pill, and neither has STDs, then why worry? I have had sex for over 20 years....with girlfriends, strangers, and wife (at that time).
I almost never used a condom, and all these years I never got a woman pregnant, and never contracted an STD. If you are sure enough that
nothing bad would happen, you don't need a condom. By the way, none of the women I've been with were on the pill. You just gotta know what you are doing.

The reason why men enjoy "bareback" is because it feels 100x better. It feels amazing. Frankly, I don't consider it "real sex" when condom is involved.
It's basically a barrier, so there is no contact at all. It's so impersonal, and totally defeats the purpose. I suspect your boyfriend saw some porn, which
is always "bareback" and he wants to experience it....hence the looking down.

How deuded are you! Your comments "you just gotta know what your are doing" are very irresponsible of you, the "withdrawal" method is totaly unsafe! The smallest amouth of pre-cum can get a girl pregnant if it's inside of her! Did you not learn anyhing in sex ed?! Also your comment regarding sex not being "real" if you bag up is utter rubbish. I can imagine you to be quite an aggressive lover. Using a condom is not impersonal nor defeats the puropse, it is safe and responsible. Shame on you for never using one, I expect you have fathered many children without even knowing.

[Boisdevie]

He probably wants to try sex without a condom because it is so much better that sex with a condom.